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sucky covers of songs


HappyCamper

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The caffeine is wearing off as the day grows long...can't stop surfing and yet political debate tough to wade in to....

 

The worst cover of all time:

 

The Wallflowers cover of David Bowie's "Heroes". The song is incapable of being covered. Actually even Bowie singing it now may be sacriledge.

 

Close runners up:

 

Police covering their own "Don't Stand So Close to Me" - one listen will make the reason why it sucks pretty clear. Also noted as the moment that Sting began to suck.

 

Sixpence None the Richer covering "there she goes" by the greatest one hit wonder band: The La's. The band's name alone means they suck in general.

 

Good covers:

 

"Sweet Jane" by Cowboy Junkies - covering some band called the Velvet Underground. Ok, now that I have crawled out of the primordial ooze and discovered the Velvets, I could see why some might call it a sucky cover. Whatever, the girl's voice is too haunting to ignore. If Jakob Dylan fronted the Cowboy Junkies, it would suck.

 

300 Thread Count Egyptian cotton sheets. That's comfort.

 

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Manfred Mann's Earth Band cover of "Blinded by the Light"

 

Easily the worst cover of all time. And for some reason, it's got way heavier rotation than the original -- which, like every song on "Greetings from Asbury Park NJ," is sublime.

 

Good cover? The Clash's version of Junior Murvin's "Police and Thieves." Better than the original, even without the falsetto stylings.

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Good Covers:

Kotton Krown - Two Nice Girls

Search and Destroy - Red Hot Chili Peppers

Kill the Police - Mudhoney

Phantom 309 - Tom Waits

California Uber Alles - Disposable Heroes of Hiphoprisy

 

Bad Covers:

Pinball Machine - The Fall

Lake of Fire - Nirvana

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Bad: Landslide by Smashing Pumpkins. Granted, Billy Corgan sucks green donkey dicks on the best of songs, but why he'd want to do a faithful cover of a Stevie Nicks tune is beyond me. Must have some sort of gauzy fabric fetish.

 

To me, good covers entail a re-envisioning of the original tune. Catpower's weary depressing cover of the Stones "Satisfaction" is a great example, as is Tom Jones fronting the Cardigans covering the Talking Heads "Burning Down The House" or the Flying Picketts acapella version of "Smells Like Teen Spirit" (including guitar parts).

 

Tear it apart and fuck it up is another great cover motif. Ever heard Negativland's version of U2's "I still haven't found (what I'm looking for)"? Its damned brilliant, and it got their pants sued off. Casey Kasem went after them too since they used a bunch of outtakes from American Top 40 in that same tune that show Mr. Kasem to be a raging dickhead.

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How 'bout, if anyone listened to This American Life this evening, that song in one of the stories, who was it? Some woman from the '80s Covering "The Itsy Bitsy Spider"? yellaf.gif Totally brain-bendingly bad. Shatner's got some competition there on the stylistic tip, and a definite beating on choice of content.

Edited by Dr_Flash_Amazing
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