Overheard on the way to Certain Doom

[Retrosaurus]

Someone yelling down from Canary Ledge:

"Hey, someone up here is telling me I shouldn't lower off with the rope running thru the sling."

 

His paid guide from a reputable guide service had just set up a TR with the rope running directly through the slings, had belayed him up the first pitch of Canary and was about to lower him off when someone on the ledge from another party spoke up.

[EWolfe]

"Don't worry, I'll pull out.."

[Figger_Eight]

I watched some dude walk out of Camp Muir, headed for the summit, in cowboy boots.

[specialed]

Figger_Eight said:

I watched some dude walk out of Camp Muir, headed for the summit, in cowboy boots.

 

That man is my hero.

[Szyjakowski]

Figger_Eight said:

I watched some dude walk out of Camp Muir, headed for the summit, in cowboy boots.

sound like Kauk. he can even slackline in cowboy boots....

what a master of stone

[sayjay]

Two favorites:

 

Cathedral Ledge, NH, 3 pitches up off the ground, watched a rather petite woman sitting on the edge of the cliff completely unanchored, belaying her partner who was well in excess of 200 lbs and was flailing his way up some really hard climb. Repeatedly scoffed at other climbers who told her she oughtta anchor herself...

 

March, 1994, Camp Muir, going up to climb Gibs Ledges. Run into this guy from east Berlin who'd been sitting out weather at Muir for 3 days, waiting to go up the Ledges. No climbing experience whatsoever, but had learned about Rainier in a geography class back in high school and so showed up with a pair of homemade snowshoes, determined to climb it. We all got up at 2am to start climbing and he just turns to me (being the only girl of the 6 of us attempting the Ledges) and offers to take some of the stuff in my pack "because I have everything I need in my pockets" (!) Dude had on like an early 1970's ski parka, wind pants and some crappy gloves in his pockets and that's it....Yikes.

Then on the way down from Muir later that day there was a thick cloud deck at ~9000' and he ended up descending onto the Nisqually Glacier and got lost. Walked the glacier all the way out to the road and had to hitch back to the parking lot at Paradise.

 

Of course he thought the whole thing was just grand. Classic case of ignorance is bliss...

[Alex]

On the Tooth, a fine sunny day many years ago.

 

Me, rapping off the top, watching an older guy coming up leading with his rope clipped into a locker, instead of tied directly to his harness: "Hey you know you should probably tie in directly, what you're doing there isnt safe."

 

The guy, pissed off: "I'm a Boeing engineer, I've done the calculations!"

 

I shrugged and decided to skate before I witnessed something bad happen.

 

For many years this guy represented "BoeAlps" to me - it was only after a long while and after climbing with a number of other covert BoeAlpers that I realized that particular club does a real good job in general teaching the basics, and that this old fart was just an anomoly...

 

If you want to see REALLY scary stuff, just go to Marrymoor any day of the week!

[toptimmy]

Aug. 1976 Yosemite valley.Its getting dark and im saying to myself i wonder whats up there?And what are these metal things sticking out of the rock for.It was at this point I realized its easier to go up than it is to go down.

[Scott_J]

sayjay said:

March, 1994, Camp Muir, going up to climb Gibs Ledges. Run into this guy from east Berlin who'd been sitting out weather at Muir for 3 days, waiting to go up the Ledges. No climbing experience whatsoever, but had learned about Rainier in a geography class back in high school and so showed up with a pair of homemade snowshoes, determined to climb it. We all got up at 2am to start climbing and he just turns to me (being the only girl of the 6 of us attempting the Ledges) and offers to take some of the stuff in my pack "because I have everything I need in my pockets" (!) Dude had on like an early 1970's ski parka, wind pants and some crappy gloves in his pockets and that's it....Yikes.

Then on the way down from Muir later that day there was a thick cloud deck at ~9000' and he ended up descending onto the Nisqually Glacier and got lost. Walked the glacier all the way out to the road and had to hitch back to the parking lot at Paradise.

 

Of course he thought the whole thing was just grand. Classic case of ignorance is bliss...

This sounds like the same dope that was on McKinley a few years ago with ski pants, real old school crampons, a wind jacket of some sort etc. Park service and some guides finally hauled his ass off the mountain. I think he alos shit in someone's sleeping bag while they were trying to save his ass from freezing to death. You know the old saying god watches over fools and drunkards. Maybe its true cause the good seem to not get many chances.

[dalius]

Ever here of the English chap who tried to climb the north side of Everest back in the 30's(??), with nothing but "God's Will" on his side? I read about this in some book of short essays about soloing. He showed up with nothing but his boots and maybe an ice axe, some wool knickers, not much else. He brought NO FOOD or DRINK!!! This guy thought that he could survive on air alone, and if it was God's Will then he's make it to the summit. Can you say Looney Tunes?

 

Needless to say, the guy went up and never returned. Supposedly his body was found and thrown in a crevasse, but even the mountain doesn't want his sorry ass! The crevasses keep spitting him out and I guess he's been thrown and rethrown into many crevasses over the years. Mountain Gods don't want that shit though. True story. Sometimes Darwinism does indeed work.

[Crackbolter]

Was climbing at Smith last spring..overheard climber at the top of a route, "okay, take....lower." The female belayer yells, "wait! wait!....my harness belt just came undone!!!" Her harness was a black diamond alpine bod and the biner and device was only clipped into the lower leg loops which were held together by the plastic buckles.

 

I was thinking well, either help the belayer now or help the dying climber later.

[pope]

In the Tetons one summer, while lounging down at Jenny Lake, we heard some Frogs babbling incoherently on the path above us (I guess there was some logic to what they were saying but it sounded like French to us). They motioned to us to come have a look, then they departed promptly. Up at the path, we discovered the inspiration for their animated conversation......a large, reddish/brown bear lumbered steadily toward us. We walked back toward the parking lot but waited at the next bend to see what would happen. When the bear rounded the previous bend, it seemed to notice us and began running toward us. We walked calmly around the corner and then ran like hell down the next straight.

 

Just then, a tourist who had apparently been alerted to the bear's location, came down the trail with his wife. "Yeah, fellows I know a bear is coming." (Now to his wife who held a video camera) "OK, when I say 'Now!' just press the green button."

 

Now when the bear came into view, still galloping full-steam toward us, the tourist jumped in front of the camera, signaled his wife to start filming, and then narrated, "This is me, this is the bear! This is me, this is the bear!" as he jumped in and out of the picture. We were sure we were going to witness a bloody mess, but then the bear made a sharp right and jumped into Jenny Lake.

 

 

[EastCoastBastard]

 

My friends and I were driving back from Mt. Washington , NH and saw a mother black bear and her cub come out of the forest and wander around the grassy patch between the forest and the road. The car behind us stopped and these morons got out to "get a closer look".

We got out of there before we witnessed something horrible.

 

When I was about 12, I was car camping with my family in the Catskills, NY and a black bear cub came wandering through the campground. Some dumbf-uck kids and their fathers decided to chase the cub out of the campground by throwing rocks and hitting it with sticks. I watched one kid go up and kick the bear. Suprisingly the cub just ambled off and these people thought they were the shit.

[Retrosaurus]

"Hey, did you see that? That guy's gripper shoes just pop right off!"

 

Spoken by a guy with a pair of Quarks and wearing a pair of Sorels.

[specialed]

EastCoastBastard said:

 

My friends and I were driving back from Mt. Washington , NH and saw a mother black bear and her cub come out of the forest and wander around the grassy patch between the forest and the road. The car behind us stopped and these morons got out to "get a closer look".

We got out of there before we witnessed something horrible.

 

When I was about 12, I was car camping with my family in the Catskills, NY and a black bear cub came wandering through the campground. Some dumbf-uck kids and their fathers decided to chase the cub out of the campground by throwing rocks and hitting it with sticks. I watched one kid go up and kick the bear. Suprisingly the cub just ambled off and these people thought they were the shit.

 

black bears will always run away, there more scared of you. I'd like to see someone try that shit with a Grizzly or Alaska brown bear.

[DLunkman]

we were up ta the Tooth last summer and we just got donw from the raps and were eating and luonging and this guy with just sneakers comes up and says hi and starts climbing right up the South Face route. He didnt have anyone belaying him or not even any buddies there to help if he got hurt!

The guy started skething before the first crux a little and we just finished our food real quick and got out of there. We couldn't see where he was when we left. I doubt he fell off bvecause we never heard about anything later.

[Lambone]

solo the tooth...WHAT A MAINAC!

[bDubyaH]

black bears will always run away, there more scared of you. I'd like to see someone try that shit with a Grizzly or Alaska brown bear.

man if you can think it up someone has tried it up here, guranteed. I have seen people moving closer to brownies with a camera to their head, not really aware of how close they are getting, people also like to approah moose for some reason as well...in my opinion some of them need to get . i have enough problems getting chased by moose and shit when i'm out running. people intentionally messing with them (like the guy in anchorage who jumped on a moose's back) i have no sympathy for when the pain comes.

[minx]

bDubyaH said:

black bears will always run away, there more scared of you. I'd like to see someone try that shit with a Grizzly or Alaska brown bear.

man if you can think it up someone has tried it up here, guranteed. I have seen people moving closer to brownies with a camera to their head, not really aware of how close they are getting, people also like to approah moose for some reason as well...in my opinion some of them need to get . i have enough problems getting chased by moose and shit when i'm out running. people intentionally messing with them (like the guy in anchorage who jumped on a moose's back) i have no sympathy for when the pain comes.

 

"moose? it's not like we're talking about bears" I heard this about 5 min before coming face to face w/a moose on my last trip to WY. This was about a 1/2 a second before the moose charged towards us and the horse i was on went careening down the trail towards camp. I didn't mind getting smacked w/tree branches at full gallop so much as i minded the large cliff off to the left. Never been so scared.

[specialed]

Man I almost got gored by a buffallo in yellowstone when I was there skiing once. Everyone says don't worry about the bison in the winter it takes to much energy for them to chase you, blah, blah. I was out skating on this snowmachine track (don't ask me why) and came across two huge motherfucking bison playing? or fighting? maybe but they were jumping around and butting heads right in the middle of the track. Finally they chill and this dude in a snowmachine tries to pass them, and I decide to go behind him. Then at the last minute I decided just to let the dude go. And he gets up to the bison and the buffallo chases his ass. Dude revs the machine and bairly manages to escape the fuckers horns. I'm like oh fuck standing there in my lycra and shit. But I'm getting cold as hell so I just ski by and the buffallo is eyeing me and grunting the whole time. I don't think I've ever felt as vulnerable. Except for when that one chick put rufis in my drink, but thats another story.

[nolanr]

 

"moose? it's not like we're talking about bears" I heard this about 5 min before coming face to face w/a moose on my last trip to WY. This was about a 1/2 a second before the moose charged towards us and the horse i was on went careening down the trail towards camp. I didn't mind getting smacked w/tree branches at full gallop so much as i minded the large cliff off to the left. Never been so scared.

 

Most of what I hear, be more scared of the moose than the bear.

[jhamaker]

>>>Man I almost got gored by a buffallo in yellowstone when I was there skiing once.<<<

 

Unlucky you. I was skating back to W Yellowstone after 3 days of the park to myself along the river (river on left, steep ridge on rt) when I skied up behind several buffalo. I hung back and followed them for ever untill we came to a "slow vehicle turnout". The buffalo pulled over to let me pass. I just think they have a thing for snow machines. I don't blame them.

 

 

 

[Gaston_Lagaffe]

At Smith a couple of years ago I was sitting by Cinnamon Slab waiting for a group to finish the easy face climbs by it when I see this woman belaying her partner with a GriGri attached to a gear loop. Since the climber was only 7-10 feet off the ground I ask him if he can be secure for a second while his belayer fixes her setup. After explaining to the woman where to clip the biner the climber proceeds.

 

But wait, there's more.

 

The leader ties into the anchors and yells down for the woman to tie in and follow. I had decided to stick around for a second to make sure that her first error was just "that one time" you do something stupid. It wasn't. Me: "Ehemm." She (in a nice way, mind you):"Is there something else wrong?" Me:"Mmmm actually, yes. You're tied into your leg loop." and proceed to show her how to properly tie in.

 

On a side note: My friend, a total safety Nazi, rapped off the end of the rope and fell 25ft after being CERTAIN he saw BOTH ends of the rope hit the ground when he tossed it from the anchor. He got away with a broken ankle and bruised hip. Killed his 4 month climbing trip mid-way though. Lesson learned: tie a know at the end of the rope.

[Alpinfox]

DLunkman said:

we were up ta the Tooth last summer and we just got donw from the raps and were eating and luonging and this guy with just sneakers comes up and says hi and starts climbing right up the South Face route. He didnt have anyone belaying him or not even any buddies there to help if he got hurt!

The guy started skething before the first crux a little and we just finished our food real quick and got out of there. We couldn't see where he was when we left. I doubt he fell off bvecause we never heard about anything later.

_____________________________________

Oh My! This is deeply disturbing! I just checked my official Mountaineers Mountain Manual, and that soloing stuff is strongly discouraged! In fact, my last "assistant leader" said that he had even seen people soloing stuff that was HARDER than the tooth! How irresponsible and stupid... I think we should post guards at all trailheads and make sure that only "properly trained and equipped" people, like the MOUNTAINEERS of course, can get up to the mountains. It's for the safety of everyone.

 

La Ti Da, I'm a MOUNTAINEER! I think I'll take 10 other loud, yuppie wankers and go climb da toof in plastic boots and wear head to toe gore-tex in July and shake my head at those "irresponsible soloists".

 

-Mightier than you

[Attitude]

Another .