Hey buddy,
I've always worried about you and your wife. I would say the same as most here and take the job in Cali. Either way you are in a compromise and if it doesn't work out, you can still have COBRA from that job and Cali has some really great FMLA (Family Medical Leave Absence) laws. I mean, really, really, really, great ones. They'll basically pay up to like 60% of your wages if for up to six weeks. I can look up some more stuff for you if you want. You're a tough dude. Tough times don't last, Tough people do. Cheers mate