how to open wine bottle

[AlpineK]

How to get a

[browntoe98]

This is insane... You want to be able to recork the bottle and you don't want little pieces of cork in your wine. I'd rather slab my wife's butt than a wine bottle's.

 

Just get out the old whisper lite stove, "far it up", as we used to say in Texas, and set that wine bottle on it.

 

No stove? No problem - the block of an internal combustion engine works well too.

 

 

[EWolfe]

Hell, I can't get this third bottle open WITH a corkscrew!

[Alpine_Tom]

russ said:

David_Parker said:

Alpine_Tom said:

You can hold it on its side and gently, repeatedly, bang the base of the bottle against the wall. The cork will gradually work its way out.

 

I lost a bet once while traveling in Europe. A very large German named Helmut bet me he could open a bottle of wine without using a corkscrew, breaking the bottle or pushing the cork into the bottle. I accepted and he proceeded to smack the butt of the bottle repeatedly with a very large and powerful hand. The cork slowly inched it's way out until it protruded enough for Helmut to grab it and pull it out. Later, while skiing on a glacier we had the same dilemma. With gloved hands we tried to repeat Helmut's stunt, but it hurt too much. I think we used a sneaker and smacked it with that until the cork came out enough for us to grab it.

 

My climbing partner tried the hold & smack method a few years ago, about a week before we were suppose to climb Stuart. Bottle shattered - sliced finger tendon - end of climbing season.

 

Thump it against the wall, people! Not your hand, the wall! And you can hold it in a towel, to be safe.

 

Sheesh.

[E-rock]

While we're on the topic, how do you use one of those corkscrews that has the two prongs that are supposed to slip down either side of the cork, between the cork and the glass? I can't seem to use it without pushing the goddamn cork in.

[EWolfe]

side to side - walk it like a penguin. ..

[joe_average]

MisterE said:

side to side - walk it like a penguin. ..

No, it's just ice cream.....

[EWolfe]

joe_average said:

MisterE said:

side to side - walk it like a penguin. ..

No, it's just ice cream.....

 

STFU, Molly-hater

[E-rock]

MisterE said:

joe_average said:

MisterE said:

side to side - walk it like a penguin. ..

No, it's just ice cream.....

 

STFU, Molly-hater

[Billygoat]

Alpine_Tom said:

russ said:

David_Parker said:

Alpine_Tom said:

You can hold it on its side and gently, repeatedly, bang the base of the bottle against the wall. The cork will gradually work its way out.

 

I lost a bet once while traveling in Europe. A very large German named Helmut bet me he could open a bottle of wine without using a corkscrew, breaking the bottle or pushing the cork into the bottle. I accepted and he proceeded to smack the butt of the bottle repeatedly with a very large and powerful hand. The cork slowly inched it's way out until it protruded enough for Helmut to grab it and pull it out. Later, while skiing on a glacier we had the same dilemma. With gloved hands we tried to repeat Helmut's stunt, but it hurt too much. I think we used a sneaker and smacked it with that until the cork came out enough for us to grab it.

 

My climbing partner tried the hold & smack method a few years ago, about a week before we were suppose to climb Stuart. Bottle shattered - sliced finger tendon - end of climbing season.

 

Thump it against the wall, people! Not your hand, the wall! And you can hold it in a towel, to be safe.

 

Sheesh.

 

Watch it these days guys, the bottle manufactuers have been making weak bottles to stifle the bottle washing industry that serviced the smaller vineyards. The big guys don't like losing any market share. The bottles in Europe are probably much thicker.

 

Why the hell is this thread going on and on...

[Thinker]

browntoe98 said:

 

Just get out the old whisper lite stove, "far it up", as we used to say in Texas, and set that wine bottle on it.

 

No stove? No problem - the block of an internal combustion engine works well too.

 

I wouldn't recommend this for a good bottle of wine, as the high temperatures could (and probably would) alter the flavor and character of the wine. Might be fine for the cheap stuff.

[Scott_J]

hell just score the neck and tap it off. now drink to heart's content

[bunglehead]

I tried that tappping the bottom of the wine bottle shit with a friend last night.

I call bullshit unless it's carbonated. The cork didn't budge at all.

[scott_harpell]

Thinker said:

browntoe98 said:

 

Just get out the old whisper lite stove, "far it up", as we used to say in Texas, and set that wine bottle on it.

 

No stove? No problem - the block of an internal combustion engine works well too.

 

I wouldn't recommend this for a good bottle of wine, as the high temperatures could (and probably would) alter the flavor and character of the wine. Might be fine for the cheap stuff.

 

it will kill it! why doyou think cellars are temp and humidity controlled!?! if you have ever tasted a wine that got too hot in shipping you know what i mean.

[David_Parker]

bunglehead said:

I tried that tappping the bottom of the wine bottle shit with a friend last night.

I call bullshit unless it's carbonated. The cork didn't budge at all.

 

You guys didn't hit it hard enough! Carbonation not needed. I agree about the glass quality being less these days. I drink beer anyways.

[bunglehead]

I was afraid the fucking bottle was gonna break.

[sobo]

Beck said:

...if you buy table wine by the 4 liter jug for 'table wine' in europe, it will have a screw cap. italy has a colloqualism for them, i believe

 

Literally, it would be "vino di tavola", but I've also heard these gems of libation referred to as "bomboli", which literally translated means something like a 5-gallon propane cylinder over here.