War

[Sean_Halling]

Yes I think Mary would work just fine for Panther......of course she still has all her teeth though. I have to check with Backcountry but I propose that Team Gander Mountain transforms..or should I say evolve into Team PantherHunter. Yes that would do just fine. Changing times call for changing missions.

[panther]

Bring it on you little bitches. Paintball skiing will decide who's the man around here!

[ 11-16-2001: Message edited by: panther ]

[Cpt.Caveman]

Team Gander_WeakMothers are gonna lose bithes! Wheres SmallballsRocky!

[rat]

for your enjoyment, a cut-and-paste from interesting-people.org. it could've been written by bonzo, but wasn't.

>>This is a post from a CNN message board: Orion Ramsey - Friday,>>09/21/01, 2:35:00pm (#58980 of 58989)>>>>To those extremists that perpetrated this crime against our nation, I>>have a warning for you. There are those of us who look at your>>actions as irrational, twisted, and completely inhuman. By all>>measures, what you have done can only be seen as insane. I have news>>for you. We're more nuts than you, and it should scare you s***less.>>>>You may think that when you die for your cause, you go to Paradise>>with 72 virgins, can leave reservations for 70 members of your>>family, all your sins are forgiven, and you sit at the side of Allah.>>Big deal. We had 39 guys who rented a Beverly Hills mansion, cut>>off their nuts, built a web site, and proceeded to poison themselves>>to death to hitch a ride with aliens out on the Hale-Bopp comet.>>>>You shoot guns into the sky to celebrate victories over enemies, and>>people are killed by the bullets raining down on them. We not only do>>this for New Year's Eve in some cities, but we burn houses down, tear>>up streets, loot and sack our stores, and beat ourselves senseless>>when our sports teams win championships.>>>>Sports teams! We made a sequel to Police Academy 5. We gave an award>>for singing to two guys who never even sang. We put little sweaters on>>dogs. We shot John Lennon six times and didn't even aim for Yoko Ono.>>We think Elvis is still alive. We put Braille on drive-up automatic>>teller machines. We think that a simple button on a web site that says>>"Do not click if you're under 21" will do anything but cause a person>>under 21 to click on it. We take a large chunk of the island on which>>those buildings you destroyed sat and pretend that it isn't a part of>>our country after all, let people fly into our airports that we want to>>kill, drive them in limousines to speak against us on this "pretend>>territory" land, let them drive back to our airport, and let them fly>>them back home without a scratch. We sell hot dogs in packages of ten>>and the buns in packages of eight. We can't even decide if pitchers>>should have to bat for themselves or not. All those baseball fields>>we've got. And none of them are even remotely the same size.>>>>We gave millions of dollars to a guy that told us that God was going to>>kill him if he didn't raise enough money. When he didn't get enough>>money, he didn't die. So we gave him more money in celebration of the>>fact that God didn't make him die. We've managed to keep the formulas>>for Coca-Cola and Kentucky Fried Chicken secret for decades, we encrypt>>the most banal communications on our Information Superhighway, and yet>>we given away our most important nuclear secrets to the Chinese and>>Russians at the drop of a hat. And yet, with all this on the A-1 Psycho>>balance sheet, you still think you're more nuts than us that this won't>>result in your complete and utter annihilation? One way or another, your>>way of life will be over, period.>>>>Freedom's kind of a crazy, kooky, nutty thing when you look really close>>at it and all the bizarre and loony things that can result from it, but>>it's better than any other ideas anybody else has come up with. It's>>been that way since 1776, and built to last no matter how insanely we>>try to screw it up on a daily basis. We are even so nuts and ruthless>>enough as a nation to start insanely tearing at those of ourselves that>>even remotely resemble you in such rancorous, deplorable, and angry ways>>that will make you wonder if Allah has enough glue to piece enough of>>you back together for a flesh paperweight in Paradise.>>>>We may not know where you are now, but when we do I guarantee you that>>the majority of our high school children will still have no idea where>>on the globe where you are or where you will end up being buried. But>>we will send them anyway, and we will allow those of them that went into>>the armed services because they didn't manage to get into college>>*still* rain down Hell and fire on your worthless hides. It will all>>come down on you, because we're nuts enough to give all four of our>>branches of military services extremely powerful and deadly aircraft>>even though only one of them is actually called the Air Force. Picking>>a fight with the most insane nation on Earth with the hope that your>>message and influence will spread throughout the world, well, that's>>just downright stupid.

[ 11-16-2001: Message edited by: rat ]

[Dru]

quote:

---

Originally posted by rat:

[ 11-16-2001: Message edited by: rat ]

---

How 'bout this:

U.S. "GROSSLY UNPREPARED" FOR UNLIKELY THREATS

Washington, D.C. (SatireWire.com) - In a haunting Senate hearingtoday on risk assessment and emergency readiness, officials fromdozens of government agencies conceded the United States is"grossly unprepared" to deal with thousands of highly unlikelythreats, including falling chunks of the Moon should it explodeinto pieces, or the simultaneous spontaneous combustion of everyperson east of the Mississippi.

Or anything to do with vampires or poisonous housecats.

As senators listened aghast, officials from the Centers forDisease Control, FBI, FDA, NASA, and National Endowment for theArts confessed that despite the safeguards implemented sinceSeptember, the country remains at implausible risk.

CDC Director Dr. Jeffrey Koplan was equally disheartening in hisanalysis.

"If some undetectable disease is introduced that spreads soquickly and is so deadly that anyone within a 1000-mile radiusdies before they're even exposed, we have not dedicated adequateresources to handle that effectively at this time, no," Koplansaid.

Asked what diseases might fit this category, Koplan shifteduncomfortably as he acknowledged the CDC did not know of any,nor had it directed drug companies to prepare a vaccine tocombat them. That response infuriated and terrified Sen. PatRoberts, R-Kan.

"What do you mean you 'don't know of any'?" asked Roberts. "Theentire nation, and perhaps the entire world, could be killed bythis virus and you've never even heard of it? I won't evenbother asking what you're doing about killer bees."

While some senators and agency directors focused on externalthreats - under withering cross examination, Mary Ryan,assistant secretary of state for consular affairs, confessedthat Canada could attack at any time. - many wondered ifinternal dangers were being adequately addressed.

Occupational Safety and Health Administration administrator JohnHenshaw, for instance, was noticeably cowed after MississippiSen. Trent Lott turned his attentions on office supplies.

"Well, God help us," intoned Sen. Joseph Biden, D-Del., who thenordered the Senate's sergeant-at-arms to remove all staplersfrom the Capitol building and congressional offices.

Homeland Security Director Tom Ridge, however, urged senators tostop the hearings, explaining that airing such dangers publiclycould expose weaknesses that America's enemies would exploit.Biden, however, said the American people deserved to know whattheir government was doing to safeguard them, and asked Ridge ifhis team had considered the possibility that a rogue nationmight create a Category 5 hurricane the size of Asia that wouldhave the ability to suck up the entire U.S. wheat harvest.

"Boy, I don't think so," Ridge replied as several senators ranscreaming from the building as a precaution. "Also, I haven'tgiven much thought to the potential for an army of lethallyradioactive wallabies that could crawl into all our beds atnight, pretending to be pillows."

Health and Human Services Secretary Tommy Thompson, meanwhile,testified that HHS was ill-prepared to respond if everyAmerican, from infant to the elderly, suddenly began smokingcigarettes and continued to do so, non-stop, 24 hours a day.However, Sen. Jesse Helms, R-N.C., had Thompson's testimonystricken from the record, arguing that it described a "goal,"not a threat.

[Squid]

Nothing ever really changes.

[j_b]

Nothing ever really changes.

 

yes, it does. most of the meatheads are now gone!

[Fairweather]

Nothing ever really changes.

 

yes, it does. most of the meatheads are now gone!

 

Yes. I really liked Rodchester. Was he a meathead too?...Because he didn't agree with you?...You fucking shitbag. When I depart, PP and JayB will be about the only ones left around here to spoil your swim in the country club pool, jackass. And before you cite your respect for them-versus-me, refer back to some of your more recent attacks on them.

 

You're a real prick.

[foraker]

can we maybe trade them in for a meathead to be named later?

[Dechristo]

Human Services Secretary Tommy Thompson, meanwhile,

testified that HHS was ill-prepared to respond if every

American, from infant to the elderly, suddenly began smoking

cigarettes and continued to do so, non-stop, 24 hours a day.

However, Sen. Jesse Helms, R-N.C., had Thompson's testimony

stricken from the record, arguing that it described a "goal,"

not a threat.

 

Thanks for pulling that piece from the archives; funny shit.

[j_b]

good to see you come of the woodwork when called upon

 

you going somewhere? did you get tired of the tough-talking act on the internet and you finally signed up for an iraq tour?

[Fairweather]

The thread was about Afghanistan, moron. Reading comprehension.

[Ireneo_Funes]

Send us a postcard from Kabul, then.

[cj001f]

Ahh... Afghanistan. I remember when the media cared about that country. Elections delayed twice. Continuing strife. Blossoming drug production. Terrorists still on the loose. Ahh, the sweet smell of success!

[barjor]

War is bad, I don't think war was the solution to our problems.

Edited August 17, 2005 by barjor

[j_b]

very good! Fairweather finally figured out that Iraq and Afghanistan are 2 different countries ... not that we could have guessed so from his rhetoric anyway.

[Fairweather]

War is bad, I don't think war was the solution to our problems.

 

[Fairweather]

very good! Fairweather finally figured out that Iraq and Afghanistan are 2 different countries ... not that we could have guessed so from his rhetoric anyway.

 

I'm just happy...that you're happy...that all the meatheads who once frequented this site are either banned or dead. Tell me, j_b, what is your final solution to the conservative problem?

[cj001f]

Funny, I don't think that war was meant to solve our problems.

[Dru]

War is meant to increase the profits of the Military-Industrial Complex at the expense of the taxpayer.

[Fairweather]

Adolph Hitler. Problem solved...by war.

[j_b]

because hitler was born in a vacuum

[Dru]

His mom must have been flexible.

[cj001f]

Adolph Hitler. Problem solved...by war.

by that war I meant Afghanistan. Focus, Fairweather, focus.

[Fairweather]

Improper use of implied that on your part.