ChocChick Posted May 25, 2004 Posted May 25, 2004 Okay, I am seriously getting sick and f-ing tired of being asked for spare change every goddamn time I leave the office. Truth of the matter is that I can't spare change because I am one of those poor suckers who lives paycheck to paycheck because I have started my "career" over and am the bottom of the salary range for what I do. Yesterday some screwball approached me with some sob story about his car being stuck on the bridge because he ran out of gas and no one would take his Canadian currency. He told me he was respectable and worked at MicroSoft in Canada. You shoulda seen this guy! He was wearing some old man leisure slacks, a funky golf sweater and a visor. At a quick glance he may have looked respectable but the open sores on his face and rotting teeth gave him away. Everyone has some f-ing sob story about why they need my spare change. Hell, even I have my own sob story as to why I need MY spare change! Anyways, anyone have a clever and effective retort I can use on these people? Quote
foraker Posted May 25, 2004 Posted May 25, 2004 Not really, but the best I heard once was from a friend of mine who, in reply to the question 'Spare change?' said 'Nope, thanks. Got plenty' Quote
ChocChick Posted May 25, 2004 Author Posted May 25, 2004 yeah, most days that is my "technique" but some days, like today, I want to SAY something. Ya know, make a difference. . . Quote
foraker Posted May 25, 2004 Posted May 25, 2004 I just ignore them. Just because they're homeless doesn't mean you have to recognize their existence. I ignore all sorts of people all day. Why should I give money to people when it's well known that at least 70% of them have substance abuse problems? I'm not helping them, I'm hurting them. I once saw this guy with this huge wad of hundreds and twenties. I think he had more money that I did! Quote
scott_harpell Posted May 25, 2004 Posted May 25, 2004 Ignoring their existence usually works. Hmmm... Soviet style socialist huh? Quote
JoshK Posted May 25, 2004 Posted May 25, 2004 I agree in helping the downtroden but there are much better ways to do it then handing out spare change. Give to charity, support shelters, job creation programs, drug treatment help, etc. I'm sorry if it's mean to the homeless people who really are looking to better themselves but I am not going to take the risk that I am feeding some fuckstick's alcohol or crack problem. Quote
Skeezix Posted May 25, 2004 Posted May 25, 2004 One time I said, "Do you take credit cards?" ...The guy said, "Sure, I'll take your credit card!" Being a wise ass backfired on me. Another time I saw a guy on an off-ramp holding a sign that said "Homeless - need money for alcohol (At least I'm honest)" ...I didn't give him any money either. Quote
rbw1966 Posted May 25, 2004 Posted May 25, 2004 If I am feeling froggy I reply "I work too hard for my money to just give it away." Funniest thing I saw was a punk carrying a sign that said "Insult the street punk" with a pricelist. $1 for insults concerning his appearance; $5 for using profanity. Quote
fenderfour Posted May 25, 2004 Posted May 25, 2004 I saw a guy on Capitol Hill who was playing chess for $$$. Not a bad idea. Quote
ken4ord Posted May 25, 2004 Posted May 25, 2004 Most of the time in my mind I want to say 'get a fucking job'. A direct "no" works and whatever you do don't make eye contact. At least I have to give a little credit for the ones who beat the pavement and go asking people for money. The ones that really get me are the one with the sign, their to lazy to even ask. I feel bad for all the ones that have some sort of mental disorder, like guy I saw yesterday beating the hell out of himself. Quote
scott_harpell Posted May 26, 2004 Posted May 26, 2004 On time, I replied in Russian, but fucker knew russian. Quote
jjd Posted May 26, 2004 Posted May 26, 2004 Why not look them in the eye, say "no, I don't" and continue on your way instead of being an ass about it? Quote
scott_harpell Posted May 26, 2004 Posted May 26, 2004 Why not look them in the eye, say "no, I don't" and continue on your way instead of being an ass about it? Because the is lying. Quote
cracked Posted May 26, 2004 Posted May 26, 2004 "Spare change?" Is not a question. If they mean "Do you have any change you could spare me?" then the above is not a lie. If they mean "Do you have spare change on your person?" then the above is indeed a lie, but then all you have to say is "yes". I prefer to scowl and push by. Quote
olyclimber Posted May 26, 2004 Posted May 26, 2004 The title of this thread reminds me of the last shithead who panhandled me. He politely asked me for some money, I said "no, I don't have any to give you"....and then he started verbally abusing me. I assume he was just insane, so I laughed at him and walked off...but this has happened to me more than once. Usually it is the 'Ave Rat' sort. Quote
Dru Posted May 26, 2004 Posted May 26, 2004 "I'm not giving you any money you tweaky meth head" is a triumph of truth over political correctness. Try it and feel empowered. Quote
Off_White Posted May 26, 2004 Posted May 26, 2004 Why not look them in the eye, say "no, I don't" and continue on your way instead of being an ass about it? Exactly Quote
Thadsboner Posted May 26, 2004 Posted May 26, 2004 Anyways, anyone have a clever and effective retort I can use on these people? Ask them if they can break a hundred, that usually works for me if i am feeling like an ass. Quote
scott_harpell Posted May 26, 2004 Posted May 26, 2004 Anyways, anyone have a clever and effective retort I can use on these people? Ask them if they can break a hundred, that usually works for me if i am feeling like an ass. Quote
slothrop Posted May 26, 2004 Posted May 26, 2004 I almost never have change on me... so I pull out my pockets like a penniless clown and give 'em an honest "don't have any". Quote
olyclimber Posted May 26, 2004 Posted May 26, 2004 I hope you don't show them the elephant's trunk! Quote
John Frieh Posted May 26, 2004 Posted May 26, 2004 I always tell them "Change comes from within." Quote
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