Dr_Flash_Amazing

Dirty, dirty, dirty!

Dru relies on the fixatives in cosmetics to keep the lipstick on his sexy squid hand-puppets. Rrrroowwwrrrr!

Are you sure the Bush voters weren't perhaps just lacking some other gene? Something that controls common sense, maybe?

'Cause your last name's "Enemy," So if you say the first and last name together, you get "archenemy." Weird coincidence there, no?

And how funny that you wound up with the first name "Arch." It makes a word when you say it with your last name. Cool.

There's a Newsweek writer named Mark Hosenball.

This is sometimes called "staring," yes?

Clearly, you've taken a fashion grounder on this one. Like the Rolex watch, the Rolls Royce, and the Donald, Dr. Flash Amazing never goes out of style. Over-the-hill ball-gaggers, however...

Maybe you're dylsexic.

Maybe she's chinese Bound to be.

I doubt she must be bound to be interesting What if she's Thai?

Great Scott!

Feline side-effect of Olestra intake?

Shallow racialist.

a few years down the track we'll be a Las Vegas lounge act but we'll be back we'll be back, 'cause we're the Boingers "Boinger? What's a 'boinger?' Sounds vaguely perverse." "No, that'd be "Billy and the Diddlers."

Trad climbing--yeesh. Metallica UB40 xXnot drinkingXx

Oh, they're just as willing to create their own reality as the administration they slavishly follow is. You should check them out some time over at that other web forum. Motor in with a little left-wing rhetoric and watch them get on their hamster wheels and try to outrun you. Although they're usually too distracted by some rehashed "news" about Hanoi Jane, or some tired internet hoax that they think is real. Kind of gets boring after awhile, though, since none of them are as thoroughly bookish as JayB (an as-yet un-routed nemesis ), nor as anal as the seldom seen MtnGoat.

Nemeses: 1. Trask 2. Greg W 3. Cpt. Caveman 4. Mike What's-his-name 5. Sisu 6. Dwayner 7. Fairweather 8. Scott Somebody-or-other 9. RuMR Outcomes: 1. Banned. Repeatedly. Eventually banned from his place of banishment. 2-8. Banned/quitters. Some repeatedly. Currently stewing in a funky broth of sour, sour grapes, simmering on a flame of unquenchable envy. 9. Not technically a nemesis, but cute and easy to rile (like a little badger!), and currently in some sort of exile. Don't mess with Dr. Flash Amazing, folks. The historical record speaks for itself.

This kind probably wouldn't smell like French fries, though.

Fuck ANWR; there's the answer to our impending energy crisis right there! Oilystat in every pot!

Mmmm, revisionist history! Be sure to get your USDA recommended daily allowance to ensure a healthy stay-in-step, and to build a strong head-down-and-eyes-closed. Preliminary studies from Texas even indicate that regular intake of revisionist history will maintain your do-as-we-say until well into your retirement years. Yummy!

Good one. A little stilted, but strong enough to work. You two have milked this cheeseball humor long enough, and you haven't come up with jack. It was gouda you to try, but you pretty much bleu it. Clearly nacho area of expertise.

Scandalous slutteration!

Poor, poor losers. Bagging a fly Betty who climbs 5.12, digs vehicular sleepage, fiends for tuff weekends, and wants to go climbing on the honeymoon is a piece of cake--if you're Dr. Flash Amazing. Some handy hints for those less predisposed to successful pro-vertical, inter-gender relationeering: 1. Clip bolts, boulder, or otherwise ensure your climbing activities remain no more than one rope-length off the deck. Nothing is less sexy to the fairer sex than the possibility of getting benighted halfway up some godforsaken wall in some godforsaken wilderness with nothing but a rope, a rack, and an empty Nalgene bottle--oh, and your sorry, epic-bound ass. The promise of a pint and a Caesar salad, followed up by a comfy sleeping environment is critical. Any woman who does acquiesce to your wayward multipitch desires will doubtless need a shave and a bath, and should be fled from post-haste. 2. Be fit, and above all, thin. That alpine-style spare tire that allows you to survive your forced bivies in relative comfort (see above) is not an attribute that is desired by the desirable. DFA recommends running laps on steep, highly-visible gym routes until your physique becomes a billboard advertising to all single babelets in the joint that you are a strong man, capable of rope-gunning the most grievous of Miss Chalkdusty's projects. 3. Maintain an attitude of cool detatchment and subtle superiority, telegraphing to your quarry that you are both brilliant and complex, with unstoppable cogs of creativity ever turning beneath your steely, unflappable exterior. Naturally, it is helpful to actually be brilliant and complex, but since this is unattainable for most terminally single rock-wranglers, a reasonable facsimile may be concocted. Practice in the mirror every day, aiming for a determinedly quizzical thousand-yard stare, alternating occasionally with a sly smirk or "eureka! I've got it!"-type of expression. Mix these expressions freely with beta-miming the moves of your latest project to seal the deal. 4. Know how to use a stick-clip. (If you have to ask why, you'll never get it.) And, as a cautionary note, one should never, ever, no matter how tempting it may be, claim to be Dr. Flash Amazing. The ladies are a wily lot, and can smell a fraud--and the attendant desperation fueling fraudulence--like a doberman smells fear, and will not hesitate to report your tragic status to the rest of the pack, effectively and permanently ending whatever meager chance at success you may once have had. Best of luck, gentlemen, and don't forget to shower! Masculinely, confidently, successfully, Dr. Flash "sorry, ladies--spoken-for" Amazing

Cheap AC/DC ripoff.