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Posted

Wikipedia and the BBC agree that it's ok for you to use the term gay as a pejorative.

 

Generalized pejorative use

When used with a derisive attitude (e.g. "that was so gay"), the word gay is pejorative. While retaining its other meanings, it has also acquired "a widespread current usage" amongst young people, as a general term of disparagement.[27][28] This pejorative usage has its origins in the late 1970s. Beginning in the 1980s and especially in the late 1990s, the usage as a generic insult became common among young people.[28]

 

This usage of the word has been criticized as homophobic. A 2006 BBC ruling by the Board of Governors over the use of the word in this context by Chris Moyles on his Radio 1 show, "I do not want that one, it's gay," advises "caution on its use" for this reason:

 

“ "The word ‘gay’, in addition to being used to mean ‘homosexual’ or ‘carefree’, was often now used to mean ‘lame’ or ‘rubbish’. This is a widespread current usage of the word amongst young people... The word 'gay' ... need not be offensive... or homophobic ... The governors said, however, that Moyles was simply keeping up with developments in English usage. ... The committee... was "familiar with hearing this word in this context." The governors believed that in describing a ring tone as 'gay', the DJ was conveying that he thought it was 'rubbish', rather than 'homosexual'. ... The panel acknowledged however that this use... in a derogatory sense... could cause offence in some listeners, and counselled caution on its use. ”

—BBC Board of Governors, [27]

 

...

 

Shortly after the Moyles incident a campaign against homophobia was launched in Britain under the slogan "homophobia is gay", playing on the double meaning of the word "gay" in youth culture.[30]

 

 

Posted

Can't we just laugh about our differences, rather than pretending there are no differences?

 

Dude - where *did* you go to college? Clearly you missed out on ethno-gendo-culturo-senso course/seminar/retreat/confessional that would have clearly and definitively answered this question for you. Tisk-tisk.

 

Posted

Why would you say "gay" when you mean "stupid" or "lame" unless you equate being gay with being stupid and lame? It's not that the word has an additional meaning, rather that the usage is deemed a minimally acceptable expression of bigoted stereotypes.

 

Change up the words a little and see how it works for you. The next time your friend won't cover the tab at the bar, tell him that's mighty jewish of him. If enough of us do it we can just insist that it just means "cheap" and has nothing to do with the religion or ethnicity.

Posted

Can't we just laugh about our differences, rather than pretending there are no differences?

 

Dude - where *did* you go to college? Clearly you missed out on ethno-gendo-culturo-senso course/seminar/retreat/confessional that would have clearly and definitively answered this question for you. Tisk-tisk.

 

I was busy having sex with girls, duh

Posted
Why would you say "gay" when you mean "stupid" or "lame" unless you equate being gay with being stupid and lame? It's not that the word has an additional meaning, rather that the usage is deemed a minimally acceptable expression of bigoted stereotypes.

 

Change up the words a little and see how it works for you. The next time your friend won't cover the tab at the bar, tell him that's mighty jewish of him. If enough of us do it we can just insist that it just means "cheap" and has nothing to do with the religion or ethnicity.

 

I see your point. However, my Jewish friends are usually the first to make fun of Jewish stereotypes.

 

I think its all in the delivery. You can usually tell if someone is being playful and friendly versus mean and hateful.

Posted

Verbal expression has a way of defying simple convention. A word can have many connotative, contextual meanings and associated emotional impacts. The N word carries with it a history of violent oppression, and so typically jars the listener.

 

"Gay", however, has many softer, more humorous connotations. It's the feeling Nitrox got when he discovered an old trunk full of his mom's stalkings, panties and bras. For that ever-so-brief half hour, alone, in that attic, he cast off the yoke of his manly burdens - with its brooding, its encroaching Mexicans, the hidden vibrating egg - and danced. Tentatively at first, growing ever lighter as the sun streamed through the slatted vent, finally twirling madly to music only he could hear.

 

There simply isn't another single word that conveys this apotheosis, this embracing of the inner little-pussy-boy, as well or as humorously as the word "gay".

 

As the FW's and Nitrox's of the world have gradually come out and become accepted as equals, "gay" has lost much of its former punch as an insult, and gained more of an ironic, tongue in cheek usage. A cocked head, squinty German specs, and worn pair of Allstars should enable anyone squeamish about its use to wield it without offense. Remember, everything's contextual.

 

The alternative, of course, is broad spectrum censorship in word and thought. This would seem to be trading one type of repression with another. Its much less stressful and just plain more fuckin' fun to occasionally offend someone you couldn't give less of a fuck about anyway and gayly get on with it.

 

You'll note that people who are easily offended tend also to be alone and therefore unhappy, which doesn't help their original condition much.

 

Happily, the world is full of people, a minority, but a robust one, who pick their battles and keep their sense of humor always at hand.

Posted
Why would you say "gay" when you mean "stupid" or "lame" unless you equate being gay with being stupid and lame?

b/c it fits your warped sense of humor? while i don't much like wearing pink, i'm a complete advocate of gay rights, have had gay friends, and make damn sure my gay students don't get fucked w/ - but i still say gay, b/c that's the culture i grew up in, and if in my own head at least its meant to be ironic, that's good enough for me

 

i have learned to avoid describing things as retarded though in the presence of the special ed teachers i work w/, after an unfortunate incident my first year :) that said, a special ed teacher i frequently clmib w/, and even happens to post on this board once in a blue moon, uses that mean, mean word all the time in jest

 

if i'm around someone who takes any of the words i'm wont to use offensively, i usually watch my language if i like them, or increase the frequency to drive them to fucking distraction :)

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