MARRIAGE

[lummox]

ryland_moore said:

"If you stay at home on a sunny day, you feel like you have wasted that day, when instead you should just be happy that you arer spending the day with me."

what a narcissist. whe should be happy youlll hang out wit her ever. she better be giving you good loving or give her the boot.

[kitten]

lummox said:

ryland_moore said:

"If you stay at home on a sunny day, you feel like you have wasted that day, when instead you should just be happy that you arer spending the day with me."

what a narcissist. whe should be happy youlll hang out wit her ever. she better be giving you good loving or give her the boot.

It takes two to have good lovin'...

You still single???

[Crackbolter]

Typical response.

 

Be glad she has some understanding. Otherwise, it wouldn't have lasted nearly as long as it has.

[lummox]

kitten said:

You still single???

off and on. you know how it goes: the common thread running through all my failed relationships is me. meanwhile im waiting for my cellmate. er. i mean my soulmate.

[mtngrrrl]

kitten said:

I don't see harm in cragging for the day even with only one other person of the opposite sex - in agreeance with rumr.

But when it is only two people spending time on an alpine route, sweating, climbing, and hanging around a campfire for too long. That is a recipe for disaster. Humans form bonds with one another whether they mean to or not when given the right amount of time and space. PERIOD.

 

Well everyone is different, but I guess I don't feel that spending a bunch of time on an alpine route automatically leads to "disaster". I mean, why can't these bonds of which you speak just be a close relationship? I have had more excellent male partners who I found attractive and admirable, but I (and they) were/are committed to our partners.

 

What do you mean by disaster? Do you mean getting crushed out? Do you mean acting on attraction? If so, to what extent?

 

My partner and I do most outdoor stuff together, but not everything. We don't have "limits", but it hasn't been much of an issue. We're just committed.

[snoboy]

kitten said:

NEXT QUESTION??????

Do you think it is inappropriate to do weekend routes with the opposite sex without your wife present?

 

WTF is wrong with you people, and kitten I don't mean just you, it's just that your quote seems to sum it up.

 

Have you nothing better to do or think about?

 

I'd be laughing my ass off at you guys if you weren't so damn pathetic!

[EWolfe]

I finally found my true love when I was 40 and convinced I was going to be single all my life - we have been happily married for two years.

I consider myself very fortunate, because I did wait for my soul-mate, and she is beautiful, wealthy, climbs 5.10, smart and strong, as well as being an amazing balance between woman and little girl. Sher is 37 and doesn't look a day over 30.

It is a lot more work than anything I have ever done in my life. Giving up independence for a partnership is a life challenge, IMHO.

[erik]

MisterE said:

I finally found my true love when I was 40 and convinced I was going to be single all my life - we have been happily married for two years.

I consider myself very fortunate, because I did wait for my soul-mate, and she is beautiful, wealthy, climbs 5.10, smart and strong, as well as being an amazing balance between woman and little girl. Sher is 37 and doesn't look a day over 30.

It is a lot more work than anything I have ever done in my life. Giving up independence for a partnership is a life challenge, IMHO.

 

whats her sister's digits again?

 

[lummox]

MisterE said:

I finally found my true love when I was 40 and convinced I was going to be single all my life - we have been happily married for two years.

I consider myself very fortunate, because I did wait for my soul-mate, and she is beautiful, wealthy, climbs 5.10, smart and strong, as well as being an amazing balance between woman and little girl. Sher is 37 and doesn't look a day over 30.

wealthy huh? she got a sister? is her mom in good health?

[Fairweather]

I've been married to the same wonderful woman for 18 years...together for almost 20. She does not climb, and never did. Tennis and skiing (alpine) are the only sporting interests we share. She likes camping and dayhikes, and that's ok. We have always given eachother lots of "space" but I've tried not to take advantage of her liberal outlook re: my climbing activities. I've never tried to pressure her to come along even though she's in awsome shape and would probably kick ass. (...and since someone asked, climbing with an unattached member of the opposite sex is strongly discouraged.)

 

Our kids are definitely the "glue" for us, and the focus of our lives together, but we have childless friends who have been married just as long. Both my kids were introduced to the mountains at a very young age, but only my son has continued with an interest in climbing and he travels with me often.

 

Just my .02.

[Figger_Eight]

"NEXT QUESTION??????

Do you think it is inappropriate to do weekend routes with the opposite sex without your wife present? "

 

My ex had a problem with this, but she was just as selfish as I was with pursuing her own goals apart from the relationship.

 

My current SO has no problem with me climbing with other women, even overnight. I almost went on an expedition with a good friend of mine who happens to be female.

[lummox]

Fairweather said:

Our kids are definitely the "glue" for us

wtf does that mean? your kids keep you and your wife acting like you all huffed out?

[marylou]

ryland_moore said:

I am being sarcastic, but have had a GF on and off for 3 yrs. The main thing we fight about is me leaving every weekend to go climbing. Or it is hunting in the late Fall, and fishing in the Spring, and then climbing in between hunting and fishing weekends. I just do not enjoy going shopping, or picnicing, or taking walks, or having lazy days. She tells me that, " If you stay at home on a sunny day, you feel like you have wasted that day, when instead you should just be happy that you arer spending the day with me." Are all women like this? Am I being too selfish? Or are we just really different?

 

I'm always surprised to read or hear of situations like this. Isn't "love of the outdoors" pretty high on your list of interests? My experience with being involved with people who don't share my love of the outdoors is that the relationships don't work out. Doesn't even matter if your ability levels or favorite activities are the same as far as I can tell. Currently we get out every weekend that I'm not working and he's not out of town, sometimes it's hardcore, and sometimes it's camping at the beach or lift serviced skiing, but it's always outside. If there's something one of us doesn't want to do, we go with other partners of whatever gender they happen to be.

 

If you're in a solid, committed relationship, what on earth difference does it make?

[JayB]

A related question: why do people marry climbers in the first place if they have issues with the activity? It's different if someone takes up the hobby after the relationship begins, but unless the person keeps the activity a secret it seems to me that the non-climbing spouse has ample opportunity to grapple with the issue and should know if their prospective spouses activity will be a constant source of difficulty in the relationship and if so, decide if the upside of marrying that person will be greater or less than the downside.

 

An even greater mystery is why a serious climber would marry someone that either can't deal with a passion that exists outside the boundaries of the relationship or has no equally compelling interests of their own, whatever they may be. Seems like a surefire recipe for bitterness, resentment, and conflict to me. Thankfully this is not the case with most married climbers that I know, and a little compromise and understanding on both sides seems to go a long way towards making their relationships work.

 

Regarding the cheating issue - I'd never stick with anyone that had a serious problem with me climbing, hiking, or whatever with a woman, and I'd never sweat it if she went off with another guy. Anything less indicates an absence of trust and faith in your partner's character, or you are in a relationship with somone who does not warrant either. In either case you've got a relationship that I'd want no part of. The fact of the matter is that it's hardly necessary to go on an expedition to have an affair, and if you are the type of person that will cheat on your husband/wife/partner it'll happen sooner or later, no matter how hard you try to avoid situations where temptation might get the best of you. Besides, if you are that tempted you should probably reconsider/do some serious work on the relationship you are in IMO.

 

[Paul_detrick]

this is good , keep it coming. One thing i've never understood people who can't just be friends with members of the oppsite sex. Or who don't think other people can, Im sorry for you, your missing out on good friendship.

[mtngrrrl]

Paul_detrick said:

this is good , keep it coming. One thing i've never understood people who can't just be friends with members of the oppsite sex. Or who don't think other people can, Im sorry for you, your missing out on good friendship.

 

Cheers to that mate.

[snoboy]

mtngrrrl said:

Paul_detrick said:

this is good , keep it coming. One thing i've never understood people who can't just be friends with members of the oppsite sex. Or who don't think other people can, Im sorry for you, your missing out on good friendship.

 

Cheers to that mate.

 

[EWolfe]

lummox said:

wealthy huh? she got a sister? is her mom in good health?

 

FYI, she is a self-made woman, none of the rest of her family is wealthy. Her sister lives in Chicago.

 

[allthumbs]

Checking in from Big Sky country - Hello 'dare ladies and fags.

 

Marriage is a good thing; I've always enjoyed other guy's wives.

[EWolfe]

trask said:

Checking in from Big Sky country - Hello 'dare fellow fags.

 

Same-sex Marriage is a good thing; I've always enjoyed other guys

 

 

 

 

[allthumbs]

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.

 

[sk]

trask said:

There are a number of mechanical devices which increase sexual arousal, particularly in women. Chief among these is the Mercedes-Benz 380SL convertible.

 

[Anna]

Do you think it is inappropriate to do weekend routes with the opposite sex without your wife present?

 

That sux...

 

Now if all three of you could go.....THAT WOULD BE AWESOME!!!!!!!

 

 

 

[montanapup]

Here! Here!

 

I second that thought. I have to agree with that one.

[Anna]

Hey Trask~

 

Say HI to Montana for me!

 

...tell her that I will be there next month, I PROMISE!