layton

All I kept hearing was how much sympathy I'd get from 'da ladies. I ain't got shit. Some theories: 1.I frighten small children 2.Aggro wheelchair drivin' 3.Aggro crutchin' 4.Aggro gimpin' 5.Women want to be taken care of, not the reverse 6.I look like a homeless bum 7.I look like a vetran 8.I'm expecting it, therefor I ain't getting it. 9.I leave the ladies speachless with desire Seriously, not one attractive female has stopped and done the whole puppy dog thing. No hot college girls, no drunk hippy chick, and certainly no MILFS. This blows. I'm getting a puppy. ps. the same complaint goes for being a climber. "oh your a climber, you must get all the ladies." PPS. what do you call a climber w/no girlfriend. A: homeless

I got the bends once when we tested our new gammov bag at the american alpine inst. We had it totally inflated w/me inside and someone ripped open the zipper letting over 15,000" worth of elevation gain in (according to my watch). I was send home w/no L&I form that day. hehe!

I love liars, but hate myself Actually, I lied. I hate em and love myself. But I hate myself for being a liar and being hated by thelawgoddess. Actually I love being hated by the lawgoddess. I lied. I hate you all. But then again, I'm a liar...

what happened to all the the pics before y'all change the website last?

guide's wall is pretty rad. Irene's arete, open book are other good ones not mentioned. everything else mentioned is good. lot's o' walkin.

Nice one Matt! I got you confused w/the "other" Matt Anderson of Big 4 fame. All the droppin shit and getting lost sounds like him. I wouldn't put up w/someone else being a climber and sharing my name. You guys should fight! Besides that, I'm jealous. Sounds like a good climb! Gear suggestions?

No work and no play can make michael layton a very dull boy

Like your girlfriend. Gimme a PM if ya wanna hang out in Chi-town.

Jordop seems to be into choss these days!

Sure looks differnt from when my friends and I did i a way back

What did you eat for dinner that night?

I keep hearin' 'bout the cathedral, grimface, castle, etc. Good place to go when it's rainin' here? Weather better than WA pass generally?

I'm in B'ham until Monday night. I'd quite like to go drinkin' at Casa tonight if anyone is reading this. I'll be back on the 26th. I walked 6 miles today (very very slowly) on the N.Lake Whatom trail. Old man training! I might drop a line now and then, but I'm going to Chicago to rest and get away from climbing and spraying for a spell. Look out when I get back. I don't plan on resting till I'm through w/the cascades. As for pain meds... I haven't had a pain pill in weeks ('cept for Ibu to keep down the swelling). My pain meds come fermented in a pint glass.

Yup! Got my pins pulled (5) yesterday. No novicane or nothin'! Yikes!!! Now I can "walk". 2-3 weeks till climbin!

You can have my old one Trask. The rest o' y'all. No, your gay.

how's this one?

Mr. Rodgers is dead, elmo is gay, marry popins was a crack whore, and Neco can say what he wants.

Back of Beyond Buttress! My favorite rockclimb ever. ****!

Got around the lake in my wheelchair yesterday and then i got drunk. Now it is today.

Sorry, I ran out of pain meds and was grumpy. Cheers, -Mike

Q:How do you make a woman cum twice? A:Who fucking cares.

Look in the summit register on the 9/11 tradgedy. You'll see my name. Also, look a few days or weeks before that. There is either a funny, or scary entry about a guy that came up there to kill himself, then the following entries of folks trying to find the jumper. Good drama on the mtn.

First of all your an arrogant idiot. It's not like we're doing 1st ascents on these routes! The more info the better chance of success. Fuck all that adventure bullshit for the approach. What you need for a successful climb are good directions to the climb, a good description of what the climb looks like and what features it follows, and a friggin' photo of the climb with a line drawn over it. No one ever said they needed a move by move description, but if you can't find the goddamn climb cuz the author has his head shoved up his ass, then that's not an adventure, that's bullshit. A lot of the complaints aren't b/c the climbers aren't using their heads, there's just nothing to go on. You need ESP to figure out where the hell some of the climbs are supposed to be. Red rocks isn't in the middle of nowhere where routes get seldom done like here in the PNW. The long "adventure climbs" are 1/2 hour from a major city with 1,000s of people climbing there every day! Also, there are millions of climbs in the world. Lets say you wanna do one so you go your way and wind up a loose rotten climb with only one good 10b pitch or something and the rest is all 5.2. With a good guide you can see this from the topo. Now you can pick a climb that has lots of good pitches and will wind up seeming like just as an adventure anways. There are too many climbs to waste time on with soo many good ones out there. With a good guide, you can pick you route much better. I lived in redrocks and climbed a shitload of long routes there, and a handfull of sport routes and get just as pissed as the one time visitors when the photo of their climb was taken from a hotel window, or no info at all is described as to what the start of climb looks like or where it is. Better yet, his descent info can get you killed since he is just dead WRONG sometimes. Instead of "descend down left" he'll fill in the description with shit like, "you'll be singing the blues on this one" or some dumb as comment. Swain blows. As for sport climb guidebooks...they gotta find their climbs too. They should be the most useful of all guidebooks since there are so many climbs packed into a small space. Obscure guidbooks: Yeah, Budro's WA pass guidebooks is really stupid, BUT it did have some climbs not listed elsewhere until recently. City of Rocks suck pretty bad (except for the tiny little classic climbs by chockstone).