Dr_Flash_Amazing

Get OUT!

Not funny, chump. Actually, interestingly enough, it's from a website called displaysforschools.com. Presumably something they might put up in some kind of festive holiday montage?

What's this, Trask? You'll be smokin' poles for science? Good on ya, mate!

Tex, that's not him. He can be seen in the photo below, however. First one to the right of the large burning cross.

Apparently the subtleties of self-deprecating sarcasm are also wasted on the right-wing set. DFA will stick to jokes about poop and boobs from now on so everyone in class can follow along.

No, dumbass, that's Pete Townsend. What, do you live under a rock or some shit like that? Psh ...

Isn't that the guy from The Who?

As the Descendents said, "everything sucks today." True indeed, fellows.

Ha ha, just ribbing you, jerknutz. It was a joke, see? Bein' that we're mostly all of European descent and all ... Ah, forget it. Another choice nugget of sophisticated humor squandered on a republican.

Or, for that matter, ever hear of Red Rocks, where it's sixty mofuggin' degrees in December and sunny like Malibu? Damn straight, homie! Road trips are for getting the hell out to someplace new or someplace different from the norm, to better weather or better conditions, for music- and caffeine-fueled epic drives, for days of climbing, and all manner of other goodness. But for Spring and Summer only? You're hosing yourself and good if you stick to that philosophy! Now go pack the car and get the hell outta here, and don't come back til you've racked up at least 2,000 miles and some raw fingertips! Scoot!

Elaborate, elaborate! Come on, Puget, make us jealous! Where you headin'? The Big Ditch? Bishop? J-Tree? Huh? Huh? Where you goin'?

Will you be sportin' or traddin'? Or both?

Unless you pick up the AIDS, mang. Then you're firehosed. Best to stick with the latex and up your odds of a lengthy life.

Have you ever been, Greg? Whatcha gonna climb down there?

Where is that little lauging guy emoticon when you need him? Score one for ScottP!

Speak for yourself, whitey. What're you, some kind of racist? You making fun of DFA's heritage, that it? And hey Trask, don't forget raison trois, i.e. boo-coo moolah in the pockets of Bell, McDonnell-Douglas, Raytheon, Lockheed-Martin, et. al. The pigs are certainly lining up at the trough as we speak!

So, anyone have any road trips planned for the holiday season? Someone's gotta be stoked on going somewhere; let's hear it!

Dude, Dru, you can't just call a bitch a potato, man! It's a new millenium, you gotta be sensitive and shit!

Silence, heathen philistine!

Doesn't this belong in Spray?

Keep it up, funnyman. DFA has feelings too, you know.

Eh?

Awesome! That was entertaining for almost 15 seconds! OK, what's next?!

Bah. Stupid fucking thing to worry about or argue about or whatever. Dr. Flash Amazing stands corrected, or redirected, or admits to being misconcepted. Trask, DFA doesn't give a flying fuck if you listen to The Chipmunks or Crass, Fleetwood Mac or Fugazi, Bing Crosby or Bad Religion. The Doctor was just surprised, for the reasons previously stated, is all. Rock on, brother.

True enough. The only way to "get to know" someone via this accursed medium is to cobble together some vague sketch of their personality and whatnot from things they say. Having never been in the Trask living room to flip through your CD (or is it LP?) collection, DFA really couldn't say. However, given all available evidence (and your remarkable cunning at the cut-and-paste gig), signs point to nothing from the Dischord label in your stacks of wax. But, really, who knows? Or cares?