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ivan

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Everything posted by ivan

  1. dude, when i was a kid, she had glow in the dark rosary beads! that way you can jerk off under the sheets n' see what you're doing and get forgiveness for the act all at once!
  2. and reads the gospels n' shit during the sunday service too! she must not be too hardcore though - i recall finding her diaphram in her bathroom drawer when i was 12
  3. Your dad was a Catholic Priest? naw, he was an army colonel - my ma's hard-core catholic though, does that count?
  4. ivan

    Teabagging

    god i fucking love japanese tv! the ninja challenge one has got to be the best...
  5. and to answer the question, yes, your sandstone climb will be mroe dangerous in the muck, but 30% is not bad and, at least for a place like smith, no reason not to go
  6. hmm - over the past 6 months i'm having a hard time remembering clmibing when it WASN'T shitty out
  7. both can be right - it's all about the monkey that's inside you and what trigger you gotta pull to get those good brain chemicals flowing - a lotta folks get their endorphins from their kids - for me, while i love my kids and spend plenty of time w/ them, i generally still feel near suicidial and deeply angry after a couple days locked up w/ them - what you do: climb, golf, throw a ball w/ your son, whatever doens't matter - dr phil tells me the important thing is being happy :puke:
  8. ivan

    caption?

    when photoshop attacks!
  9. smith doesn't count?
  10. says the man who had a big chunk of his skull sitting in a glass jar for months on end!
  11. ivan

    caption?

    i fucking HATE hitchcock!
  12. changes in spray are like changes in bosses
  13. mt mansfield, the state highpoint, this time of year is in fact quite, quite lovely, especially if you ski!
  14. nice, btw!
  15. nuke 'em "you have a right to kill me - you do have that right - but you have no right to judge me" and later, in regards to the perfect warriors: "You have to have men who are moral... and at the same time who are able to utilize their primordial instincts to kill without feeling... without passion... without judgment... without judgment. Because it's judgment that defeats us"
  16. for some reason this reminds me of my baseball coach my last year of high school - ex-drug dealer, recently out of jail, coaching for some sorta community service, dumb as sin, old as hell, ragged-ass junkie for a wife - couldn't hit a fucking ball to the outfield - life at the great end - he said one day "hey, i may be fuck old and have nothign to show for it, but at least i can floss my teeth w/ pussy-hair every night" - toothless
  17. ivan

    Howl is ur Day?

    dude, try teaching! after saying inane shit like that on a daily basis for a decade now, i've learned the best policy after uttering such a pearl of wisdom is to pretend you never said it, then just talk faster! dazzle'em w/ brilliance of baffle'em w/ bullshit
  18. ivan

    Howl is ur Day?

    i read enough to find it funny that he thought voltaire, not victor hugo, wrote les miserables
  19. does anyone remember what colonel kurtz would have said about this?
  20. ivan

    Howl is ur Day?

    i never could quite get the hang of thursdays
  21. that and poison oak!
  22. ivan

    DC Sux

    Be prepared for some nasty poison ivy as well hmm...i can't recall getting into any there or anywhere else in the actual blue ridge - back in richmond (or round here in the gorge) for that matter...
  23. i would say that's the wrong conclusion to take from these humble 5 pages - i gather that most folks are fine w/ boltless climbing crags, but don't think that's particularily earth-shattering - crags are like chix - you're not too particuliar what they look like so long as you can have them good n' savage like
  24. i had to slay seven hoboes around a campfire in index to show my sorrow to the dread baby jesus lord and earn his forgiveness
  25. badass lightning inside the ash clouds!
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