Dwayner

You wanna know why we haven't paid our UN dues in years? Because we get constantly screwed by ridiculous resolutions in the General Assembly year after year after year. It will be a cold day in hell when Togo and Paraguay dictate American economics and foreign policy the US. The UN is a great idea in theory, and is still worthwhile in many ways, but it's often not worth the abuse...and we've propped that place up for many years including hosting the facilities on our own soil. Secondly, in terms of generosity: "You talking per capita, aid budget, charitable donations, total $$$ spent or what? I don't have the statistics at hand but I believe we are the top giver in all of these categories as I believe we should be. If you've been blessed with a good life, I think you should pay a little back, and even though it's easy to be cynical about guy's like Billy Gates, at least he is pouring back BILLIONS into worthy causes.

YATTAH!This cool cat could use a little:Check me out. I'm a cool cat. P.S. big mistake wasn't it! You must now obey the Alpine Kitty. Check your watch...where have you been the last half-hour...you can't remember can you? Now check your pockets...where did that receipt for a couch dance at the Deja Vu come from...look at the date and time...it was 15 minutes ago. Smell your shirt...it reeks of stripper perfume...now go check the mileage in the car...you've been somewhere recently and the engine is still kinda warm...and there are hamburger wrappers on the floor on the passenger's side...face it: the Alpine Kitty took control of your life for half an hour and you got in your car, ordered some burgers from the Big Mac, made a lightning quick trip to "the Vu" for a little party on your lap, and then ran out to return to this very computer.You should be so lucky that you lost only thirty minutes...last week, the Alpine Kitty sent me on a mission that must have taken me half a day, including loads of alcohol, "chimichangas", and a fistful of phone numbers and business cards. When I finally snapped out of it, I was seated in front of the computer as I am now, with my pants on backwards, scratch marks on my back and a black eye. ....Beware the Alpine Kitty.Also, a bag full of my climbing gear was found 2 pitches up on City Park at Index. The Kitty is powerful! [ 02-01-2002: Message edited by: Dwayner ]

Nice comments from Matt! Not the usual blather I expect when such topics come up. (I've spent too much time around the never-been-out-of-this-country, - daddy's-paying-my-tuition-at-the-expensive-private-school-and-my-ex-hippie-"Golden Age of the Sixties"-protesting-professor-taught-me-that-the-US-and-everything-about-it-sucks-college-brat/knuckheads.) Just a few last sprays:Despite the fact that the US is not without it's faults (I, for one, am embarrassed how we tend to export some of the disgraceful by-products of a free-society elsewhere, such as violent movies and junk television), the fact remains, the U.S. is STILL the most generous country on earth.. (And the West has been pouring untold billions of aid into such places as Afghanistan, Egypt, Sudan, etc. while the oil-rich countries in the region don't seem to care that much about their brethren, unless the US or Israel gets too involved. And then millions are sent to rodents like Bin-Loser.)You're right Matt...$$$ ain't enough, but it helps if accompanied by action.and, re: "Ouch Pope, what did you do to Dwayner?" I'm talkin' about the Real Pope, of course, not the climbing pal/smartass who posts on here who actually names himself after a sleezeball CIA agent by that name in the movie, "The Eiger Sanction". And a Shabbat Shalom to all.- Dwayner

And furthermore....some tasty quotes for thought: "Liberal: a power worshipper without power."George Orwell "Conservative. noun. A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from a liberal, who wishes to replace them with others."- Ambrose Bierce "The modern definition of 'racist' is someone who is winning an argument with a liberal."- Pete Brimelow "A liberal is a man who leaves the room when the fight begins."- Heywood Broun "A liberal is a man who will give away everything he doesn't own." -- Frank Dane "I can remember way back when a liberal was one who was generous with his own money." -- Will Rogers "A radical thinks two and two makes five. A liberal is more conservative. He knows two and two make four, but he's unhappy about it." -- Herbert Prochnow "The only thing worse than a knee-jerk liberal is a knee-pad conservative." --Edward Abbey

So if I give some of these guys a sandwich, can they promise me that they won't hijack an airplane full of innocent "first world" consumers and ram it into our buildings, nuclear plants, etc.? Can they promise not to have ten kids or more kids, a good many of which survive because of our generous international food and health plans? Ain't it ideal to be an idealist!

Hey pope:Ever hear of LANCE Armstrong? He makes most climbers look like a bunch 'o weeners. [ 02-01-2002: Message edited by: Dwayner ]

Here is a translation of the lyrics in Freshie's video:GRDouble ENLEAVES! GRDouble ENLEAVES! It's So Easy!Happy Go Lucky...We Are The World,We Did It!You! You! You! You!Us! Us! Us! Us! Yatta! Yatta! Yatta! Yatta!A student just graduating!A leader of a great business!Do we ever get a lucky feelingA-with our simple leafy nakedness! Yatta! Yatta! Yatta! Yatta! Oh-we will be winning the prize!We will make our nation proud!We will become a-quite-a healthy guys!Everybody say: Yatta! Japan, On Two!Demo!Tomorrow Will Be Wonderful...Who cares if everybody is unkind? (?)Why bother sleepin' in? (?)Queue! Queue! Queue! Queue!Bus! Bus! Bus! Bus!Ohio! (or Good Morning?) Yatta! Yatta! Yatta! Yatta! Nine hours a night we're sleepingAn' we jump right out of bed!Do we ever get a lucky feelingA-when we go to work fresh and fed! Yatta! Yatta! Yatta! Yatta!you change-odd-weird meworld change-revise I FEEL GREAT!!

Hey Freshies: You got your facts wrong. I viewed the film and it appears to be the opening number of the indoor international sport-climbing competition; you know, the part where all of the competitors come out and do a musical number. A silly choice of song, if you ask me, although it appears to be in French and is driving the armchair-climbers in the audience utterly wild! Is this what we've come to? From brave heroes climbing the world's highest peaks and the north faces of the Alps to sport "climbers" dancing on stage in their underwear? Do you want to see some real action? Some real "monkey magic"? Then check out this, and a prize for anyone who can sit through the whole thing: http://www-ec.njit.edu/~jxk5205/monkey.htm

Brother MTNRGR: Good luck finding your third but beware of some of those races. I was going to do one that included trail running, sea kayaking and mountain biking PLUS several "special challenges". I decided not to bother as I prefer to do things on my own and the entry fee for the team of 3 was $250. I later watched it on television and the "special challenges" were LAME: embarrassingly LAME. One of them was to get your team mates over a barrier made of a sloping plywood wall covered with plastic and Crisco. Now there's some REAL ADVENTURE! And there might have been some.....RAPPELING! Wee! Oh my! Anyway, check it out. I actually like adventure racing but some of the events are really goofy. If you do it, hit it hard and have a great time. Just beware the greasy plywood! - Dwayner

There ain't no "vote". It's in Tacoma. You got a problem wid that? Talk to my pals Alpine K, pope, mtnrgr, erik...uh...and all of those others too. Tacoma "inconvenient for YOU"? Think about it. By the way, Fred Beckey loves Tacoma.

Who wrote this?: "It was obvious to me that this experience had empowered her, made her feel strong and in control.....I just wanted to share my friend's personal triumph wid y'all." It ain't the pope I know! Dude! Turn off Oprah and quit escorting Richard Simmons to the expresso bar! sheeeshhhh! - your concerned "Alpine Buddy", Dwayner

Trask....wait your damn turn with the rest of them.

Dru: You got a cartoon "gremlin" of me 'n Caveman drinkin' a beer? I don't punch people unless I'm attacked. - Dwayne

Dudes: It's my time of month. Let me bitch!!! Give me some space to express myself! - Dwayne

This frickin' list is so dang predictable! Try something nice and it's bound to degenerate! I start this damn Alpine Buddy thing a couple of weeks ago as a genuine effort to restore some dignity and a little genuine appreciation to this list. Week 1 was the "effortlessly cool" Matt P., Week 2 was Erik. I had someone in mind for this week with whom I thought most people would really agree but someone nominated me before I had a chance to post. I didn't ask for it, didn't want it, and don't deserve it but I wasn't going to be rude and was going to let it pass quietly until next week. Then what happens: Alpine Buddies start spontaneously appearing. Get a clue: it's only special when there is one a week. I guess Brother Caveman is the new chairman of that committee. Go Cavedude. Just add it to the list...I occasionally propose Pub Clubs outside the normal venues...and it gets shot down by the loudest voice. I write smartass reports of Pub Clubs on a regular basis, and then Uncle Tricky writes one, and he's nominated as the official chronicler! Boo hoo? Damn straight. No good deed goes unpunished on cc.com. You wanna do this stuff??? Run with it, I'm a busy guy and easily annoyed. - Dwayne P.S. Nothing personal, ubiquitous Cave-dude and affable Uncle Tricky.

Hey pope! I smell trouble with your stinky bouldering pad idea. What happens when you come home from your climbing trip and your wife/girlfriend smells someone else's bouldering pad on your person? The frying pan and/or rolling pin will make a quick appearance and you are toast. It alls sounds a little too dangerous to me. I suppose that you can always try the "honest, honey! I wasn't hanging out with my weekend climbing-Betty-sidedish, I was out with the guys at a new German-themed strip club in Leavenworth!", but this only tends to work once and has its own concequences. - Dwayner

Obey, Respect and Beware the Alpine Kitty: http://www.konstruktiv.net/kitty_02.html

Tacoma, like Matt P himself, is effortlessly cool. There's a reason why it's called "The City of Destiny" and "The most wired city in America" (in terms of communications, household cable internet, etc.) Tacoma continues to improve while Seattle moulders in the manner of the eastern seaboard.

Brother Jay: It's spelled "Ruple", but you got the Estes part correct. I ain't trying to get all bitchy, but it gets frustrating to try to organize something and then someone says, oh yah, I reserved that way back when and it's oh so convenient for us to walk home after drinking ourselves into a stupor. Some of us rarely have that luxury and some of us don't live near the apparent "center of the action". That's the story. So Estes my Ruple.By the way, Dr. Jay.....YOU RULE!- DwayneP.S. And whose last minute plea for babeage resulted in females actually showing up at that Latona pub thing?.....why it was Dwayner. Damn ingrates! [ 01-23-2002: Message edited by: Dwayner ]

Like...whatever...you clowns decide. I'm finding that some of these pub-club site nominations are a bit self-serving. Yes, I live in Tacoma, but I'm also tired of driving to Ballard or Seattle when few people make the effort to drive south. (although Chris W. and Matt P. and ehmmic are the exception and appear regularly where ever.) Erik...I did my bit...you can nominate the Tacoma site next time. I've been shot down the last couple of time and ain't gonna bother with it for awhile. And by the way...I am happy that Michelle is coming back from South America, but we ALL got stories to tell and I'm equally interested in hearing about Dan Larson's conquest of the Tooth. - Dwayne

Erik...hikerwa...MattP...Icegirl...Jules...Vegetable Belay...Chuck...ChrisW....Dr. Jay....Alpine K....Caveman....Pfffffff....pope.....Dynamite...Jon (to name just a few of the regulars - although pope ain't a regular)...TACOMA HEREBY CLAIMS THE PUB CLUB FOR NEXT WEEK AND WE EXPECT ALL OF YOU AND THE OTHERS TO SHOW UP. Matt P is so effortlessly cool that he's probably been to every one of these things and yes, he DOES has a life, a busy one. If Matt P can make it, and this week's Alpine Buddy can regularly try to make it, SO CAN YOU. We want 35 people there next week. Did you hear that? 35! So take a look at your blank appointment books and pencil it in like the big executive you think you are. - Dwayner

Mr. Good Time! With a name like yours you'd think that you would appreciate someone with good social/party skills. Give your ol' buddy Erik a cyber-handshake and say, "well done, my craggin' comrade", "keep up the good work, amigo", etc.After all, this IS the Year of Big Lou.aloha, Dwayner who just woke up and is workin' on Mickey's no.5! (One mo to go!)AND THE REST OF YOU CAN CHIME IN WITH KIND, APPRECIATIVE COMMENTS IF YOU LIKE. This is your chance to honor your Alpine Buddy; who know's maybe it will be your turn next week! [ 01-23-2002: Message edited by: Dwayner ]

Here's something I found that resembles the spray on this site. http://www.konstruktiv.net/kitty_02.html

Yah. It's getting a little Desiderata-like around here: *Write a book, nay, two books; beautiful alpine books that will appear within six months in piles at Half-Price books. *Wear wool pants so you can blame the stench of the wet fabric when you pass your perpetual gas in front of the ladies you're trying to charm in your li'l gray elf-pants. *Always check your partner...for testicular tortion. *Savor the wind and snuggle with the sage...thrown in with that picnic table, that you are burning, because you are too cheap to buy firewood. *Take time to tell your climbing partner that he's special because he's climbing with you. *Rope up with care, for we are there, and do not stare, as I bare, my buttocks to the air, and relieve myself, on your Crazy Creek chair. (Ya like that last one, pope?)

1) Favorite Climb: Donna Top-Step 2) Favorite Climber: Dwayner 3) Always wanted to do that climb: Donna Top-Step's sister!