Dwayner

What have any of you done for Dwayner today?

"BTW- My "sycophantic, semi-educated minion" TA is working on a PHD and has been studying Geography for more than 8 years. I value her opinion and advice much more than drunk ol Proffessor Dwayners." Woo-hoo, Lambone! I'd value her geographical advice more that my own too...especially since she's been at it for 8 years...and can probably anticipate another 8 in that field, because teaching bonehead geography classes as a TA might be the only job she's gonna get in Geography..and I ain't speaking of her specifically, it's fields like that in general. Lots of folks hang out in graduate school because the reality of the real world is not very comforting when it comes to landing employment with a Ph.D. in things such as geography, anthropology, English lit, history and any number of professions. I know someone who took almost 20 years to get a Ph.D. and now he's a computer nerd doing absolutely nothing even related to his subject.Yes, there are many lazy professors at big schools because they can get away with it. T.A.'s contribute to this situation. There are also many T.A.'s doing the old "make a survey" assignment which is more complicated, as you have found, than they themselves probably realized. To me, many T.A.'s are like instructors in the Mountaineers Basic Course. They are often recent graduates of the previous years Basic Course. Some are actually abused by their "boss", and many are genuine or reluctant "suck-ups". Yah...you don't have to appreciate "drunk ol Proffessor Dwayners" viewpoint, but as one who has spent plenty of time on both sides of the lecture hall, I feel I have an opinion based on a great deal more experience than yours...your comments are kind of like a sport-climber trying to teach a hardened alpinist how to place pro. And by the way....maybe you can ask that fancy T.A. of yours to teach you how to spell "Proffessor". (Here's a clue...it only has one "f").your pal, Dwayner [ 02-07-2002: Message edited by: Dwayner ]

I recall a discussion a while back about rock climber Bobbi Bensman having her breasts "enhanced". In my opinion, this sort of thing is a clear demonstration of low self-esteem and was very poor role-modeling for young females. Keep them "as God made them" I say. What's wrong with that? Anyway, I have discovered that another similar controversy is raging...examine the evidence yourself and come to your own conclusions! Check it out: Breasts o' Mystery!

Lambone-Dude! I wasn't trying to make you feel bad...Geography rocks! (as does Fish and Wildlife). I've got degrees in Political "Science" , Anthropology , and Archaeology , which are arguably far more pathetic than your major. I just felt like bitchin' about the T.A.'s; many of whom I have found to be knuckleheads and lesser shadows of their knucklehead mentors/professors. As I may have stated before, I have always taught my own lectures and graded my own papers. No one, including the high-paid guys, should think they are above that. Shalom....and get off my lap, young man! Dwayner

Mr. Puget: That was the most poorly phrased load of crap I've read on this board in weeks....and that's saying something! Now I am under the impression that you are generally a very bright and thoughtful fellow, so how about restating your opinion without the blather...effective communication is a desirable skill and I know you've got it in you. Remember those old comments about eschewing obfuscation? You're backsliding, my brother! We want to hear what you have to say! Give it another try! aloha, Dwayner

Peter Puget: You have not corrected me, but have merely exposed your lack of knowledge/experience regarding alpinism. When I need advise on clipping bolts, I'll come knocking. Dru! Congratulations! And I mean that! There are way too many unemployed geographers so count yourself among the fortunate.

Brother Iceguy say: "BUT, did you have Beckey?"No, BUT we had Alpine K, MattP, Matt, EddyE, Ehmmic, Victoria, Erik, Dr. J., John and Wallstein, each and everyone a fun and interesting gem. Too bad Iceguy, Caveman AND Fred couldn't make it. Plus the pig pictures and local characters were spectacular.Brother Erik who split early to meet up with some supermodels asked: "hotties vs alpine masters????" Dude...you'll never end up spending all of your time and money hunting down improbable alpine masters, and the alpine masters probably won't dump you for her old abusive boyfriend when he's finally let out of jail for beating her, or drop you for the next guy who comes along with more piercings.Wakey, wakey, m'man! Think mountains!aloha, Dwayner [ 02-06-2002: Message edited by: Dwayner ]

Yes, "peeing willy nilly" should be on the survey. Lambone...you answering to a T.A.? Are you some sort of undergraduate taking a massive lecture hall statistics course taught by a semi-absent professor and a few of his sycophantic, semi-educated minions (graduate students)? I pity the fool! Mr. Professor be overpaid,arrogant, and doing as little work as possible; or underpaid, cynical, and doing as little work as possible. That's what you get for going to one of them big fancy state schools which I assume is where you be going. I've always taught my own classes and graded my own papers, but maybe that's just me. - Professor Dwayner ...and a lot of T.A.'s will tell you that they know more than the professor. ..it's like nurses badmouthing the M.D.'s.

And let's have a nice turnout...and not the usual 10-1 sausagefest. Jules...I'm counting on you. Icegirl..let us dazzle you with our alpine wisdom. Dynamite....wheredya go? Plus all you others. Matt P....Chuck...you others with the great ideas....show up and spray.

Alright...it might be worth attending this thing just to bring some order to this whole embarrassing episode of "PUB CLUB WHERE?...ME, ME, ME!!!". Bring your clever ideas and we'll propose some solutions that are fair and fun. So show up and help reduce a little anarchy (but not too much). c. 7 PM Here's the directions: Those who have been to the Pub Club in Tacoma before, are well aware of the city's charm, hospitality and alpine excellence as the gateway to Mighty Tahoma, for which it is named. "The Swiss" is an excellent venue due to it's easy on/off freeway access (easier than removing your sweaty rainbow sport-climbing lycra body suit) and its nice selection of adult beverages. So drag yourselves to Tacoma and find out why it's called "The City of Destiny". Here be the directions, amigos y amigas! Pub Club Directions in Tacoma: "The Swiss", 1904 S. Yakima Directions coming south on I-5 Take Tacoma City Center Exit, #133 This will take you on a little freeway veering right known as 705 N. Get left and take the S. 21st Street exit. Go through lights and cross Pacific. Go hill on 21st a couple or few blocks until Jefferson. Make a right on Jefferson. The Swiss is just about a block ahead on the left at the corner of Jefferson and 19th. It's really easy to get back to I-5 for the return to Seattlewards. Down Jefferson, left on 21st S., and the big signs will point you in the right direction. You kids comin' from parts south...I know you can figure it out! - Dwayne

Judge MattP: I'M OUT OF THE PUB CLUB INSTIGATION BUSINESS. It ain't worth the hassle and I can't even guarantee that I can make it to the ones I propose. As I said before: to me it's a fairness issue for those who live outside the Seattle area. I've only picked the specific venue in Tacoma because everyone seemed to like it and it's freeway close and easy to find. I don't even particularly like "the Swiss" and it's not perfectly convenient for me. (There are far better places to drink in Tacoma that don't require me to walk home through "The Hilltop" if I've had too much.) Why don't you or some other regular come up with something like a schedule. I've got bigger things on my plate to tend to other than this sort of thing...

C'mon, Caveman...you'll love Tacoma...show up a few hours early and do some laps on Spire Rock, the best kept secret in northwest climbing. I'll even buy you a Big Beer. And we got a new bridge (sorta new), a new art museum goin' up, a new museum of glass going up, a world-class sushi bar, etc.: everything a modern cavedude needs to satisfy his more artistic side. And if you get nostalgic, there are plenty of McChord jets and occasional loud explosions coming from Ft. Lewis. Oo-ra! Come on down!

"come now kids, haven't most of you graduated from high school by now?" No."all this fuss over where to drink beer?" Yes."there's plenty to go around so you can go drink wherever you please."No there isn't and you know it. There is a worldwide beer shortage brought on by the Taliban. "it is unfortuante that there is no consensus this week"biggest mouth wins...ain't that how it works?"but that is no reason to sit home and pout."who's pouting? do you see anyone pouting? I don't see anyone pouting. You lookin' at me?"drink in issaquah, drink in tacoma, hell drink in your own backyard" Dude. My backyard IS in Tacoma.by the way...ask youself this as all others should do EACH AND EVERY DAY as evening approaches..."WHAT HAVE I DONE FOR DWAYNER TODAY???" [ 02-04-2002: Message edited by: Dwayner ]

RE: the ravine with the iceclimb on the cliffs near the Nisqually bridge. This would be on the right hand side looking up toward the mountain and it would be closer to the road than the obvious terrifying falls dripping out of the basalt. This ravine is barely visible from the road but becomes obvious if you hike up the valley just a short ways. Me and a guy named Mike Adams climbed this (a first ascent?) around 1978/79. It seems to me that we scrambled up on lower angle stuff and then it got quite vertical. It must have been about a full rope and a half from there. It was a very memorable experience. Mike thought he could finish the climb in one pitch from the belay. He ran out of rope way short after placing all of his screws and running it out. We were climbing, however, with a 300 ft. 9 mm double rope so he was able to hang off his tools (a couple of Lowe hummingbirds?), untie from the middle of the rope, and then tie back into one end while I pulled in the rope. It was probably my first experience on water ice and it scared the hoo-ha out of me. I don't know what the rating would be because I'm not sure there was a WI rating system back then, but it was tough, so I defer to Brother Gauthier's suggestion. And beware the approach slope! I still don't like waterfalls. - Dwayner

Cavedude! Dwayner's a jerk...nyah, nyah, nyah. Listen, amigo, I'm just trying to be fair. There is a tendency on this board for the loudest yeller to call the shots, one reason being that there are no guidelines for determining what is when except by noise. We sort of had some informal thing going last year when this all started: Seattle a couple of times in a row because that's where most people seemed to live, and then elsewhere such as Tacoma or even Everett. Then it became increasingly Seattle (which includes Ballard and the greater vicinity). It's broken down now. Perhaps we should have the intervention of the guy who goes to all of them: the effortlessly cool "MattP", who in his mighty alpine wisdom can sort out a plan of fairness. BUT YOU KNOW WHAT??? It's getting to the point where I really don't care that much because I'm tired of all of the bitching. Besides, I don't drink that much anymore because I'm in training...training for life in general. MattP....work your magic. - Dwayne

Brother Al: Here is a description of the North Face of Lane Peak. There are two main chutes that together look like the letter "V" that begin at the bottom of the face. The leftward slanting chute of this "V" is "the Zipper". It is a popular climb with a short steep section about 3/4's of the way up. It ends at a notch and some scrambling up the south face and a ridge will gain the summit. The rightward slanting chute is often called "The Fly". It is broader, not as steep, and likewise ends at a notch. To the left of the Zipper is a narrow straight chute that looks rather exciting and intimidating from a distance. This is "Lover's Lane". Its steepest bit is just near the top, where a chockstone melts out during late Spring. At the top of Lover's Lane, it is necessary to do an exposed traverse into the steepest part of the Zipper, and then finish by way of the top of Zipper. There is also a route, which me and a pal believe we pioneered, that goes right up the middle of the North Face, beginning in a short chute that begins at the bottom of the "V". After that chute ends, you can traverse right into some trees and climb rock and bushes until a vertical reddish rock wall is met. This is the crux. It's delicate climbing with maybe a 5.7 move in there and that's the key to the upper peak which is either snow or class 3 or 4 scrambling, with plenty of trees for a running belay, until the summit ridge is reached. I've considered skiing the Zipper but it probably would require a lot of hop-turns and sliding as there isn't much room for anything else. And if you mess up without a belay, you might be doomed. I've glissaded the dang thing in perfect snow conditions for such but I wouldn't recommend it. Lane Peak is a fine peak. - Dwayner

Enough already! It's in Tacoma. Hikerwa, Caveman. You got vehicles? You guys drive for hours to climb some piece of crap at Vantage or elsewhere? I'm sure you can be "adventurous" and drive to the wondrous city of Tacoma. (Do we ever see either of you at the rare Tacoma nights?)It will be at the freeway-convenient venue known as "the Swiss" around 7 PM. The beer is as good as in Issaquah and the burgers might not be as cheap, but might be just as greasy as those in Alki, minus the burly biker dudes. Directions will be provided tomorrow. There will be a huge turn out, perhaps setting new records. The swami predicts: MattP, Dr. Jay, Alpine K, Jules, ehmmic, icegirl, vegetablebelay, Chuck, ChrisW, Dynamite, Wallstein, and Eric, to name just a few. - Dwayner And by the way, I've spent a little time around Mr. Beckey, and I've never seen him drink a beer, although he can suck down a truly amazing amount of coffee.

Hey Lamebone...come on over here and sit on Uncle Dwayner's lap. He'll let you have a sip of Mickey's and edumacate you on the evils of sport-climbing...OK pal, you can get off my lap now...you've been eatin' chili in that rock gym or somethin'? and someday...when you least expect it...me 'n Mr. Pope will be coming that indoor training camp you inhabit...and demonstrate to you the newest of the new...sit-start traverses...where you drag your butt through the gravel as you move across the wall. It's all the rage and if not, it will be! aloha, D.

And furthermore...some of you idealist whiners...the world ain't as simple as it is often presented. Throwing our wealth ("redistribution")has been unevenly successful. The Marshall Plan was successful, but numerous and very generous aid plans to many other countries are outright failures. Many countries do not have the social and political infrastructures to accept our "wealth". It often gets stolen, abused or neglected. I have spent years in such countries and concluded that sharing/throwing our resources at many places in the world is a total waste. I believe that population control should be the first step. Although I think the Pope is a pretty decent guy, if I were him, I would have a revelation that birth control is mandatory. Some of the stat's and arguments noted above are often presented as evidence of the "first" world's abuse of resources, etc. I remember a few years ago, a college kid with whom I had the displeasure of spending 10 hours in a van on a ski trip. He spent at least half the time spouting out copious quantities of the usual statistics and liberal "solutions". After a while, me and a colleague looked at each other and shook our heads: this kid was wearing a $500 North Face Parka, $700 pair of new skis, etc., thousands of dollars of gear...like Jane Fonda, it's easy to be a liberal idealist when you got a few shekels in your pocket. So how about this, bleeding heart alpinists....take the first step and redistribute the wealth...start by selling your climbing gear and sending the cash to your favorite program. I'd have more respect for that then the usual noise-makin! aloha, Dwayner

Brother Matt says something to this effect:"Why do you think they are so angry at America? What has driven them to think the only solution is terrorism? I think it's because they are losers..." Exactly! Terrorists ARE losers! [ 02-01-2002: Message edited by: Dwayner ]

You wanna know why we haven't paid our UN dues in years? Because we get constantly screwed by ridiculous resolutions in the General Assembly year after year after year. It will be a cold day in hell when Togo and Paraguay dictate American economics and foreign policy the US. The UN is a great idea in theory, and is still worthwhile in many ways, but it's often not worth the abuse...and we've propped that place up for many years including hosting the facilities on our own soil. Secondly, in terms of generosity: "You talking per capita, aid budget, charitable donations, total $$$ spent or what? I don't have the statistics at hand but I believe we are the top giver in all of these categories as I believe we should be. If you've been blessed with a good life, I think you should pay a little back, and even though it's easy to be cynical about guy's like Billy Gates, at least he is pouring back BILLIONS into worthy causes.

YATTAH!This cool cat could use a little:Check me out. I'm a cool cat. P.S. big mistake wasn't it! You must now obey the Alpine Kitty. Check your watch...where have you been the last half-hour...you can't remember can you? Now check your pockets...where did that receipt for a couch dance at the Deja Vu come from...look at the date and time...it was 15 minutes ago. Smell your shirt...it reeks of stripper perfume...now go check the mileage in the car...you've been somewhere recently and the engine is still kinda warm...and there are hamburger wrappers on the floor on the passenger's side...face it: the Alpine Kitty took control of your life for half an hour and you got in your car, ordered some burgers from the Big Mac, made a lightning quick trip to "the Vu" for a little party on your lap, and then ran out to return to this very computer.You should be so lucky that you lost only thirty minutes...last week, the Alpine Kitty sent me on a mission that must have taken me half a day, including loads of alcohol, "chimichangas", and a fistful of phone numbers and business cards. When I finally snapped out of it, I was seated in front of the computer as I am now, with my pants on backwards, scratch marks on my back and a black eye. ....Beware the Alpine Kitty.Also, a bag full of my climbing gear was found 2 pitches up on City Park at Index. The Kitty is powerful! [ 02-01-2002: Message edited by: Dwayner ]

Nice comments from Matt! Not the usual blather I expect when such topics come up. (I've spent too much time around the never-been-out-of-this-country, - daddy's-paying-my-tuition-at-the-expensive-private-school-and-my-ex-hippie-"Golden Age of the Sixties"-protesting-professor-taught-me-that-the-US-and-everything-about-it-sucks-college-brat/knuckheads.) Just a few last sprays:Despite the fact that the US is not without it's faults (I, for one, am embarrassed how we tend to export some of the disgraceful by-products of a free-society elsewhere, such as violent movies and junk television), the fact remains, the U.S. is STILL the most generous country on earth.. (And the West has been pouring untold billions of aid into such places as Afghanistan, Egypt, Sudan, etc. while the oil-rich countries in the region don't seem to care that much about their brethren, unless the US or Israel gets too involved. And then millions are sent to rodents like Bin-Loser.)You're right Matt...$$$ ain't enough, but it helps if accompanied by action.and, re: "Ouch Pope, what did you do to Dwayner?" I'm talkin' about the Real Pope, of course, not the climbing pal/smartass who posts on here who actually names himself after a sleezeball CIA agent by that name in the movie, "The Eiger Sanction". And a Shabbat Shalom to all.- Dwayner

And furthermore....some tasty quotes for thought: "Liberal: a power worshipper without power."George Orwell "Conservative. noun. A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from a liberal, who wishes to replace them with others."- Ambrose Bierce "The modern definition of 'racist' is someone who is winning an argument with a liberal."- Pete Brimelow "A liberal is a man who leaves the room when the fight begins."- Heywood Broun "A liberal is a man who will give away everything he doesn't own." -- Frank Dane "I can remember way back when a liberal was one who was generous with his own money." -- Will Rogers "A radical thinks two and two makes five. A liberal is more conservative. He knows two and two make four, but he's unhappy about it." -- Herbert Prochnow "The only thing worse than a knee-jerk liberal is a knee-pad conservative." --Edward Abbey

So if I give some of these guys a sandwich, can they promise me that they won't hijack an airplane full of innocent "first world" consumers and ram it into our buildings, nuclear plants, etc.? Can they promise not to have ten kids or more kids, a good many of which survive because of our generous international food and health plans? Ain't it ideal to be an idealist!