Beacon Rock - ROCK STATUS REPORT

[Cobra_Commander]

For immediate release:

 

The rock next to the old tree 20 feet down from the base of right-left albatross-gull is still there

 

The rock to the left of the famous rock in the arena (no not the dinner plate, the small pig-shaped one) is STILL INTACT

 

Several pebbles were seen moving over the belay stance at mid-way Jill's

 

The large knife blade dagger-like rock in fresh squeeze lower remains after much yarding after tr'ing the route into submission

 

Two grains of sand were surreptitiously removed from grassy ledges. The culprits remain unknown at this time but a taskforce has been mobilized to bring justice

 

END

 

[olyclimber]

Surely this will result in a closure of climbing at Beacon till things are sorted out.

[John Frieh]

You guys are out of toliet paper @ the tree ledge again too

[Cobra_Commander]

scramble the jets!

[Cobra_Commander]

I take a dump under that tree every time I solo through to aid in its preservation.

[John Frieh]

I'd also really like to see chalk buckets @ each belay station so that I can refill my chalk ball for the next pitch.

[Cobra_Commander]

Yes! This would make it easier to mark arrows pointing the right way on the various "warriors" climbs

 

There one loose boulder on the 3rd pitch of young warriors -- omg -- it is super classic in its history and looseness.

[billcoe]

I've noticed that it's only on the internet that the drama occurs. Perhaps so some may demonstrate what they believe to be their scintillating wit. Things still seem normal on the rock.

 

 

I've really enjoyed going other places this summer more than ever though, perhaps for this reason. I don't climb to get drama like that, in fact, I climb to get away from it. Nice you started this out in spray! I suspect it will go downhill rather quickly.

[Cobra_Commander]

You can't go downhill when you start at the bottom.

[John Frieh]

What is the status of the warning signs? Perhaps they should consider updating them to the Amber Alert reader boards as to allow for up to the date warnings to be displayed at all times.

[ivan]

i think someone may have put in a beautiful bolt anchor at tree ledge, but it was pitch black and i was no more sober than an irishman on sunday morning

 

old larry had a funny story about jim on saturday - somewhere around 330 it started going nuts, saying it was going be sundown in 15 minutes, then providing a countdown for the next 30 minutes while harranguing all about him to "get the fuck down!"

 

i would have enjoyed being in brighton august 2nd - those are some cheeky looking bastards!

[kevbone]

You can't go downhill when you start at the bottom.

 

Unless you start in China. Then you start going back up.

[denalidave]

You guys are out of toliet paper @ the tree ledge again too

Don't worry, "someone" will clean it up... and it's potty ledge, not tree ledge.

[denalidave]

Yes! This would make it easier to mark arrows pointing the right way on the various "warriors" climbs

 

There one loose boulder on the 3rd pitch of young warriors -- omg -- it is super classic in its history and looseness.

I'd bet that loose rock has a nice surprise under it as the person who did it before us forgot to stop at potty ledge and decided to take a dump right on route. Then, just covered it up with a loose belay slayer 25lb rock. Come on, if you can't stop over at potty ledge, at least get off the route a few feet. Bad enough to die/be crippled from a rock like that but also be smeared with crap is just to much.

[Cobra_Commander]

Smeared with feces right before being crushed to death = awesome way to go

[olyclimber]

its even better if you live a couple weeks so people can come by and tell you how sorry they are for you

[John Frieh]

Make sure you have a bivy permit though. And an overnight parking permit for your car.

[G-spotter]

Smeared with feces right before being crushed to death = awesome way to go

 

That sounds like you are describing the climbs you did.

"Yeah, I totally onsighted Crushed To Death, but I warmed up first on Smeared with Feces and just moved over from the belay ledge. You gotta try that link up, it's an awesome way to go"

[denalidave]

Smeared with feces right before being crushed to death = awesome way to go

 

That sounds like you are describing the climbs you did.

"Yeah, I totally onsighted Crushed To Death, but I warmed up first on Smeared with Feces and just moved over from the belay ledge. You gotta try that link up, it's an awesome way to go"

Those are the great new routes someone bolted after the big loose rock was blasted out of there, just right of the arena of terror. Bolted like every 10", so it's kind of sketchy run out though.

[Cobra_Commander]

The sketchy thing was all the old webbing out there. I cut it all away and filed a littering complaint to the state park.

 

But I managed to get in 20 laps on winter delight beforehand. The best route out there.

[kevbone]

Winter Delight the best route out there....hahaha, what a joke. Its one of the worst bolting jobs in the portland area. The climb to the left of it is pretty cool.....

[minx]

You can't go downhill when you start at the bottom.

 

no, but you can start digging yourself a hole.

[G-spotter]

When asked about irony, Kevbone said he didn't have any pitons.

[Cobra_Commander]

Kevbone thinks the verb form of irony is "to iron"

[Hugh Conway]

ah, Oregon, the shit sandwich of the west coast