Is this america, or what?

[rob]

This new diet drug is all the craze, apparently -- despite it causing postential "uncontrollable bowel movements" and "gas with oily discharge."

 

WTF is up with all these diet aids? OMFG! JUST STOP EATING FUCKING TWINKIES!

 

"It's probably a smart idea to wear dark pants, and bring a change of clothes with you to work," the drug's Web site says.

 

[kevbone]

Oh my!

[mtn_mouse]

despite it causing postential

 

and the definition of postential is:

posterior potential.

[RogerJ]

This new diet drug is all the craze, apparently -- despite it causing postential "uncontrollable bowel movements" and "gas with oily discharge."

 

If this were a deterrent, then the local Burrito cart would close in a week.

 

-r

 

 

[archenemy]

"And the manufacturer notes that awareness of possible side effects acts as a disincentive to overeat fatty foods."

 

Isn't getting fat enough of a deterrent to slow down on eating fattening food? If not, why would shitting yourself be? People who are four hundred pounds don't strike me as being particularly concerned about what the little people around them think of them.

[knotzen]

JUST STOP EATING FUCKING TWINKIES!

 

For some people, that's like telling a junkie to stop using.

 

Instead of these nasty drugs, the medical folks need to focus on treating addictive personalities.

[Couloir]

"It's probably a smart idea to wear dark pants, and bring a change of clothes with you to work," the drug's Web site says.

 

 

Then I would imagine a cute skirt is definitely out of the question.

[archenemy]

JUST STOP EATING FUCKING TWINKIES!

 

For some people, that's like telling a junkie to stop using.

 

Instead of these nasty drugs, the medical folks need to focus on treating addictive personalities.

If you read a bit of literature, you'll find that their is no definable "addictive personality".

More often, obsessive behaviors are targeted for treatment. And there are plenty of people out there who specialize in just this form of therapy.

[knotzen]

If you read a bit of literature, you'll find that their is no definable "addictive personality".

 

Like with so much of psychiatric medicine, I'm sure there is a difference of opinion on that*. I think of "addictive personalities" as people who regularly practice obsessive behaviors, and who use things--food, alcohol, drugs, sex--to escape and not face the realities of their lives. Often when they manage to stop one addictive behavior, they replace it with another**.

And there are plenty of people out there who specialize in just this form of therapy.

 

I know that. But they are rarely used for eating disorders like obsessive eating. They need to be.

 

 

* I'm not trained in psychology or psychiatry--merely talking from my life experience.

** I'm not talking about the middle-aged person whose metabolism slows and they gradually put on a few pounds a year, or people who gain weight from taking a certain medication or from lying around with a broken leg, etc. I'm referring to obese people who constantly think about food, like my mother, who uses food to medicate herself, if you will. They are like bulimics, only they don't purge--they just become obese.

 

 

[G-spotter]

"It's probably a smart idea to wear dark pants, and bring a change of clothes with you to work," the drug's Web site says.

 

 

Then I would imagine a cute skirt is definitely out of the question.

 

A cute skirt and no panties (or a kilt for that matter) is just less clothes less to get shit stained. Combine it with an adult diaper for a space-age look that says "Obsessed Astronaut"

[G-spotter]

How many of these diet drugs are actually used by fatties and how many are used by bulimics looking for less vomit stains on their teeth?

[Cobra_Commander]

A little gassy oil discharge never hurt anyone.

 

Though it would be frowned upon to "pull a Valdez" while in the hot tub.

[G-spotter]

As birth rates decline and lifespan lengthens, eventually there will be a point where adult diapers outsell baby diapers and are mostly worn by old people and diet drug addicts, as well as astronauts.

[tvashtarkatena]

As fuel supplies become scarcer and diet drug use more widespread, gassy oily discharge may become an energy source.

[Cobra_Commander]

cornhola oil might provide new options in the culinary arts as well.

[Weekend_Climberz]

This thread is the shit. Or is that the shits. I don't know

[G-spotter]

As fuel supplies become scarcer and diet drug use more widespread, gassy oily discharge may become an energy source.

 

I think Vivoleum will be more readily available:

 

EXXON PROPOSES BURNING HUMANITY FOR FUEL IF CLIMATE CALAMITY HITS

 

Conference organizer fails to have Yes Men arrested

 

Text of speech, photos, video: http://www.vivoleum.com/event/

 

GO-EXPO statement: http://newswire.ca/en/releases/archive/June2007/14/c5086.html

 

Press conference before this event, Friday, Calgary: http://arusha.org/event/7214

 

Contact: mailto:fuel@theyesmen.org

 

More links at end of release.

 

Imposters posing as ExxonMobil and National Petroleum Council (NPC) representatives delivered an outrageous keynote speech to 300 oilmen at GO-EXPO, Canada's largest oil conference, held at Stampede Park in Calgary, Alberta, today.

 

The speech was billed beforehand by the GO-EXPO organizers as the major highlight of this year's conference, which had 20,000 attendees. In it, the "NPC rep" was expected to deliver the long-awaited conclusions of a study commissioned by US Energy Secretary Samuel Bodman. The NPC is headed by former ExxonMobil CEO Lee Raymond, who is also the chair of the study. (See link at end.)

 

In the actual speech, the "NPC rep" announced that current U.S. and Canadian energy policies (notably the massive, carbon-intensive exploitation of Alberta's oil sands, and the development of liquid coal) are increasing the chances of huge global calamities. But he reassured the audience that in the worst case scenario, the oil industry could "keep fuel flowing" by transforming the billions of people who die into oil.

 

"We need something like whales, but infinitely more abundant," said "NPC rep" "Shepard Wolff" (actually Andy Bichlbaum of the Yes Men), before describing the technology used to render human flesh into a new Exxon oil product called Vivoleum. 3-D animations of the process brought it to life.

 

"Vivoleum works in perfect synergy with the continued expansion of fossil fuel production," noted "Exxon rep" "Florian Osenberg" (Yes Man Mike Bonanno). "With more fossil fuels comes a greater chance of disaster, but that means more feedstock for Vivoleum. Fuel will continue to flow for those of us left."

 

The oilmen listened to the lecture with attention, and then lit "commemorative candles" supposedly made of Vivoleum obtained from the flesh of an "Exxon janitor" who died as a result of cleaning up a toxic spill. The audience only reacted when the janitor, in a video tribute, announced that he wished to be transformed into candles after his death, and all became crystal-clear.

 

At that point, Simon Mellor, Commercial & Business Development Director for the company putting on the event, strode up and physically forced the Yes Men from the stage. As Mellor escorted Bonanno out the door, a dozen journalists surrounded Bichlbaum, who, still in character as "Shepard Wolff," explained to them the rationale for Vivoleum.

 

"We've got to get ready. After all, fossil fuel development like that of my company is increasing the chances of catastrophic climate change, which could lead to massive calamities, causing migration and conflicts that would likely disable the pipelines and oil wells. Without oil we could no longer produce or transport food, and most of humanity would starve. That would be a tragedy, but at least all those bodies could be turned into fuel for the rest of us."

 

"We're not talking about killing anyone," added the "NPC rep." "We're talking about using them after nature has done the hard work. After all, 150,000 people already die from climate-change related effects every year. That's only going to go up - maybe way, way up. Will it all go to waste? That would be cruel."

 

Security guards then dragged Bichlbaum away from the reporters, and he and Bonanno were detained until Calgary Police Service officers could arrive. The policemen, determining that no major infractions had been committed, permitted the Yes Men to leave.

 

Canada's oil sands, along with "liquid coal," are keystones of Bush's Energy Security plan. Mining the oil sands is one of the dirtiest forms of oil production and has turned Canada into one of the world's worst carbon emitters. The production of "liquid coal" has twice the carbon footprint as that of ordinary gasoline. Such technologies increase the likelihood of massive climate catastrophes that will condemn to death untold millions of people, mainly poor.

 

"If our idea of energy security is to increase the chances of climate calamity, we have a very funny sense of what security really is," Bonanno said. "While ExxonMobil continues to post record profits, they use their money to persuade governments to do nothing about climate change. This is a crime against humanity."

 

"Putting the former Exxon CEO in charge of the NPC, and soliciting his advice on our energy future, is like putting the wolf in charge of the flock," said "Shepard Wolff" (Bichlbaum). "Exxon has done more damage to the environment and to our chances of survival than any other company on earth. Why should we let them determine our future?"

[Weekend_Climberz]

Leave it to the Canadians to come up with some seriously funny shit. :lmao:

[jordop]

knotzen said:

archenemy said:

If you read a bit of literature, you'll find that their is no definable "addictive personality".

 

Like with so much of psychiatric medicine, I'm sure there is a difference of opinion on that*. I think of "addictive personalities" as people who regularly practice obsessive behaviors, and who use things--food, alcohol, drugs, sex--to escape and not face the realities of their lives. Often when they manage to stop one addictive behavior, they replace it with another**.

archenemy said:

And there are plenty of people out there who specialize in just this form of therapy.

 

I know that. But they are rarely used for eating disorders like obsessive eating. They need to be.

 

 

* I'm not trained in psychology or psychiatry--merely talking from my life experience.

** I'm not talking about the middle-aged person whose metabolism slows and they gradually put on a few pounds a year, or people who gain weight from taking a certain medication or from lying around with a broken leg, etc. I'm referring to obese people who constantly think about food, like my mother, who uses food to medicate herself, if you will. They are like bulimics, only they don't purge--they just become obese.

 

 

.

Edited June 4, 2021 by jordop

[archenemy]

And there are plenty of people out there who specialize in just this form of therapy.

 

I know that. But they are rarely used for eating disorders like obsessive eating. They need to be.

 

Are you telling me that in America, where the diet industry is multi multi multi millions of dollars, shrinks haven't decided that charging a hundred bucks an hour to talk to fat people might be a good idea?

 

Edited June 19, 2007 by archenemy

[KaskadskyjKozak]

And there are plenty of people out there who specialize in just this form of therapy.

 

I know that. But they are rarely used for eating disorders like obsessive eating. They need to be.

 

Are you telling me that in America, where the diet industry is multi multi multi millions of dollars, shrinks haven't decided that charging a hundred bucks an hour to talk to fat people might be a good idea?

 

Program for lard asses: eat less; exercise more.

[pink]

there are fat stupid people who diet in every country. what are you canadien or something?

[archenemy]

I live in America so I know more about this country than any other. Duh.

[archenemy]

Oh, and I believe we have more fat people here than anywhere else. And probably more shrinks. Certainly we have more money to waste on food and on shrinks.

[pink]

hawaii is the most overweight state. then you think about all these tiny asians but then you got these sumo wrestlers rolling around.