Lambone Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 shut up bob Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ALLCAPS Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 SORRY I'M LATE BUT I'M HERE TO SECOND GUESS AND THEORIZE. ALSO, I WILL BE POSTING ALL PRESS CONFERENCE AS THEY OCCUR. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ALLCAPS Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 LAMBONE PLEASE INSTALL AN IDIOCY FILTER ON YOUR COMPUTER. SOME OF THE THINGS YOU HAVE POSTED ARE CLEARLY "NOT READY FOR RELEASE", PROBABLY EVER. THANK YOU. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Off_White Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 Man, they need to purge recent forum memberships and lock down most of those ip addresses after this circus. This has been the online equivalent of a dirty bomb - an explosion of contagious cluelessness. Â I can think of no better way to say "fuck off Pink, Joseph does have a sense of humor" than this. Â Actually, my thoughts have been running somewhat down this track, and I'm cogitating on an epistle and policy to separate the chaff from the wheat post mass media/public wahoo. I for one don't want to see this place try and compete with RC.com or NWHikers for tender sincerity in the grand scheme of things. Â Damned board upgrade still lacks a barfing graemlin. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jordop Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 There's some people over there that have obviously missed their calling and should really be working for a CSI unit. Or collecting Princess Di commemerative plates. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lambone Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 "I for one don't want to see this place try and compete with RC.com or NWHikers for tender sincerity in the grand scheme of things" Â thank god Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Off_White Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 Hey Woodsgirl: Â You live near the Tieton? Would you ever get tired of folks asking you what do you do for fun out there, do you have running water, what do you do with those sheep, and here's how I'd run your farm if I didn't have to live in Chicago? Â You've got moxie, and that's a huge plus. If you ever decide you want to stop being a spectator and go climbing on those crags in your neighborhood (and it's as good a place to learn as anywhere in the state) then you'd have a hard time doing better than hooking up with some of the raucous yahoos on this site. There are other more genteel approaches to climbing education, and guess what, a lot of those folks live here too and can point you in the right direction. Â Â Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Choada_Boy Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 Hey, climbers. First, this is a funny place, so I won't be PC, either. Have ya ever thought that this is a window into the "climber's world" where many have never looked? I live very near a great rock formation--Oak Creek in the Naches Ranger District, not back country, but a lot of climbers train there, it seems. I have to tell you, that I will think differently about those people after glimpsing the extremely rude community here. I have never seen so many people looking down on others. I am sure we will all leave. Why would we hang around with all the "when will they leave" comments? Flame me all you want; it wouldn't have taken that much to be nice to VISITORS. As for running down SAR.........tasteless. I hope if they ever come to haul your asses of the hill, that you remember all the comments here. Maybe they don't climb as well as you all, but they are generous with their time----I jam with one SAR guy every week and he misses a lot of jams due to mountain rescues. I hope if they read the comments here, that they consider the source. Â I agree. You people make me SICK. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Choada_Boy Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 OMFG. Shittiest idea yet from the other thread:  SIGNAL FLARE DROP - For the lost to light at 9:11 PM Rescue 9:11 PM !!!:  I called and described this rescue idea to Gerry Tiffany of Hood River Sheriff's Departmant on Thurday, 12/14/06. I asked him to pass the idea on to search and rescue personnel for evaluation. I haven't heard back from Gerry. Please "run with this" if you think it is viable. Please give me some feedback/ideas to make it a viable rescue technique.  Summary: The lost need a way to signal. Road flares lit by the lost, on high ground, at 9:11 PM would be effective. Deliver a visible road flare bundle/streamer to the lost.  Details: Drop 2-packs of road flares(unlit), with 250 foot long, red, plastic DANGER tape "tails", on a grid of 1000' by 1000'. Approximate cost per square mile is $200 for flares and red "DANGER" tape.  Lost climbers/hikers may see the air drop in progress because the flares(unlit) will have red, plastic, 250 foot long, "DANGER" tape "tails" attached(zip-ties). The lost can make their way to one or more flare packs and prepare to signal from high ground at 9:11 PM, as indicated on an attached info tag.  All airborne pilots/passengers and ground based viewers will aid in the search by looking for a signal flare(s) at 9:11 PM.  Perhaps "red" DANGER tape "tails" are best for snowfields/snow valleys. The lost could easily see this color on snow.  Perhaps "yellow" CAUTION tape "tails" are best for dropping into green wooded canyons. In wooded areas, the lost would likely find one or more of the flare packs, as the yellow tape would be vertical in the foliage(visible from ground) and horizontal across tree tops(visible from ridge tops).  The flares must be securely attached to the 250 foot long plastic DANGER tape to remain intact upon impact. The 250 long tail will act as a "streamer" and slow the fall of the flare bundle. The 250 foot long tail should be "stuff-sack" packed into a zip-loc bag to allow untangled unfurling after dropping from the plane.  A flying billboard message could read, "FLARE DROP", as the "noisy Cessna" air drops the flares. A local billboard flyer would probably volunteer his plane and time. This would inform the lost of the FLARE DROP.  Second, third, etc. flare bundles found by the lost could be used for heat, melting water, starting fires, etc.  One concern I have is a lot of "red tails" throwing off search and rescue personnel as false signs of the lost. But, if I was lost without a way to signal, I'd prefer seeing an organized flare drop and drag myself the 500' maximum to get a pair of flares. The red plastic DANGER tape could be made into a "Y" or "X" for aerial sighting  Future hikers/climbers could retrieve/dispose of flare bundles and "tails" to alleviate litter problems.  Materials are readily available. Walmart and Schucks for flares and Home Depot and Lowes for the DANGER and CAUTION tape.  AIR DROP TODAY and RESCUE TONIGHT???   Please evaluate this idea and pass it on to Hood River Sheriff's Department or Search and Rescue or Portland Mountain Rescue if you think it would work.  LET'S FIND THE PAIR!!  Thank you,  Dale Berg   Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lambone Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 no shit, wtf! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Choada_Boy Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 I just got off the phone with the Sheriff. I know he's busy, but I told him that I think we should call in a B-52 to carpet bomb Hood with flares attached to 250 foot long red streamers. 50,000 should do the trick. If he doesn't call me back, someone please run with this idea. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr_Phil Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 What?!? Â Is Layton on Big Four again? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StevenSeagal Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 I propose we have 4000 special forces personnel surround the mountain and use flame throwers to melt the snow, they could move uphill and meet at the top, we'd be bound to find them that way. Let me know if I should call the army and get going on this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lambone Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 no they should start at the summit and work down you idiot... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stinkyclimber Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 I propose we have 4000 special forces personnel surround the mountain and use flame throwers to melt the snow, they could move uphill and meet at the top, we'd be bound to find them that way. Let me know if I should call the army and get going on this. No good. They are all busy looking for and failing to find Osama in Afganistan. Perhaps the flame thrower trick will work over there? Why don't you call NATO and suggest... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stinkyclimber Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 no they should start at the summit and work down you idiot... Good point, otherwise the front page the next day would be: "4000 burned in bizarre flame-thrower incident on summit of Hood; search for lost climbers continue" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Off_White Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 Hey, c'mon, at least I tried to turn that idea into a good flares for beer program. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stinkyclimber Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 Perhaps that would work with Osama too. After 5 years on the run in caves and shit, one would think he has built up a powerful thirst for a cold one... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StevenSeagal Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 no they should start at the summit and work down you idiot... Â No, you see, you're not getting it--- if they start from below, anything that melts out will wash back down towards them and they won't miss it. If we implement it your way we will have to surround the mountain with a fence of some kind to catch any items of interest that wash downhill. And that would take a lot of needless manpower and resources. It would be a shame to waste those. Â Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jordop Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 How come nobody's mentioned dogs. Actually, I think dolphins have a better sense of smell. Get packs of dolphins combing the area. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lambone Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 gottcha steven, wait...I got it, bring dolphins in after the flamethrowers! Â see if we work together we can figure this out! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
griz Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 I would call up a court reporting service and see if they could help out donating their time to this effort. I would lock down the forum for just the news conference and simply post the tranny. I don't know of anyone else who is providing this service. Â Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
G-spotter Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 I still think they should send Worlds Fastest Climber DH and his wonder dog up there to rescue the missing hikers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dechristo Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 ShiniGami will save us Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr_Flush_Amazing Posted December 18, 2006 Share Posted December 18, 2006 I think it's about time someone called Chuck_Norris. Â He could print out his post count, get it double-laminated at Kinkos, and use it to probe through the whole mountian. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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