Women's Studies: The Heavy Bootprint.

[olyclimber]

If she had spit on me I would have given her just what she wanted- equality with men- and a punch in the nose. Can't have it both ways.

 

I think I would have wasted several days trying to dig up the devastating put down that I should have come up with at the time.

 

This story reminds me of my own little bizzaro interaction at UW involving a random angry woman. In highschool I'd noticed that the bigger I got, the less inclined random dickheads were to fuck with me, and even though it was no longer necessary to do so in college, I continued with the bulkification process. By the time I hit my humble apex, I think I weighed just shy of 180 and was benching about 100lbs over that.

 

I was actually on the way to the gym on campus when I heard this stream of wild profanity coming from behind me. When I turned around this wild-eyed woman who must have been pushing 50 - at least - was throwing down her bike and coming at me full throttle. I looked behind me to see if she was screaming at someone else and I was just in the way, and when I turned around she was front and center, about 1/2 a second away from her first shove to my chest.

 

"What's up now mothe%$#er!"

"Wha..."

"Yeah - what's up punk-ass! Cut me off, huh. Well we can settle this right ^%$ing here, mother^%$#"

"What are you talking about, I didn't even..."

"Didn't even &^$*ing look, did you you (*&^%ing punk."

Shove.[Look behind me for a camera. Surely this is a joke.]

"Hey - what's with the shov..."

"What's with the cutting-me off, mother^%$er?"

"Settle down. I..."

"Are you gonna settle me down, you piece of shit. Huh?"

Shove

"Look lady, I don't know wha..."

Shove

"Listen - I...."

 

This went on for at least a couple of minutes, and I was caught between confusion, and despair. All those years of lifting, all of the bulkification has clearly been for naught. This build I've been working on is not even sufficient deter violence from a rail-thin 50+ woman with waving skin beneath her arms and the beginnings of osteoporosis...

 

I walked away listening to her strange, aggressive catcals.

 

"Yeah - I thought so - PUNK."

 

I walked away from the gym, back to my room, and pondered the sheer futility that had been the bulkification crusade. I kept going to the gym, but it just wasn't the same...

 

 

 

this is the top TR of the winter. thats hardcore getting bashed by a granny. you should print up t-shirts for this one for sure.

[DirtyHarry]

She was probably trying to pick you up, but just didn't know the right words.

[jmace]

Dirt Harry is on to something

 

its right here

 

Are you gonna settle me down, you piece of shit. Huh?"

[MisterMo]

I can almost guarantee there's at least one guy on the UNH campus who was desperate enough to adopt the Sensitive Guy personae in an effort to pick-up women, who is by extension desperate enough to abase himself still further and alternately endure the inevitable blizzard of bizzare post-modern gender-ranting, and hold her hand while she weeps into her pillow while contemplating The Patriarchy and all it has wrought - in and effort to get himself a bit of angst-laden action.

 

longest sentence in universe?

 

Never read any Faulkner, huh?

[marylou]

This thread is really something. Not that there's any painting with a really big broad brush happening here or anything.

[Dru]

You said "broad" but I guess it's OK to use oppressorspeak if you're a dame yourself.

[marylou]

Leave it to Drew to catch the nuance there.

[foraker]

This thread is really something. Not that there's any painting with a really big broad brush happening here or anything.

 

Nah, it's just that us Sensitive New Age Guys are tired of being oppressed by the Women's Studies matriarchy.

[Cobra_Commander]

longest sentence in universe?

 

Never read any Faulkner, huh?

 

Faulkner = not quite so long-winded

[tlohan]

She was probably trying to pick you up, but just didn't know the right words.

I often spit on someone for lack of a good pickup line.

Needless to say, I'm very lonely.

[RoastyJones]

which reminds me of a joke:

what do you say to a woman with two black eyes?

 

nothing, she obviously doesn't listen

 

you are a dumbass

[Skeezix]

Zzzzzz...

[olyclimber]

This He-man woman haters club thread is going to attract so many women to this website, we won't know what to do. Women love testoserone.

 

And hasn't anyone mentioned jackboots yet? Or goose stepping?

[Luna]

I was walking across campus the other day when some pointy-headed hippie bumpeded into me. I was surprised because I had just left my workout and my guns were blazing. I recently started lifting pianos as there were not engough weights in the gym. I weigh 110 lbs but can now press 800.

 

I think this dude came straight from his mens sociology class or something as he was extremely belligerent, and started spewing out rages against the matriarchal machine. I just continued to back-pedal with a series of but..but...but. I assumed my buffed-out body would be a deterrent to such attacks, but alas, while most normal people respect me from afar, some are not worthy.

 

Did I mention that I detest Che shirts, yups in coffe shops, and liberals. Or did I tell you about the guy I roomed with who wore black all the time and was a "labor activist"? No, some other time then. Gotta go.

 

Liven' on the east coast put pathetically posting on CC.

[olyclimber]

this is not one of mine jay

[minx]

I can almost guarantee there's at least one guy on the UNH campus who was desperate enough to adopt the Sensitive Guy personae in an effort to pick-up women, who is by extension desperate enough to abase himself still further and alternately endure the inevitable blizzard of bizzare post-modern gender-ranting, and hold her hand while she weeps into her pillow while contemplating The Patriarchy and all it has wrought - in and effort to get himself a bit of angst-laden action.

 

longest sentence in universe?

 

 

is angst laden action better than just getting any action? should i have held out for this?

[olyclimber]

always. give it a try some time.

[JayB]

I was walking across campus the other day when some pointy-headed hippie bumpeded into me. I was surprised because I had just left my workout and my guns were blazing. I recently started lifting pianos as there were not engough weights in the gym. I weigh 110 lbs but can now press 800.

 

I think this dude came straight from his mens sociology class or something as he was extremely belligerent, and started spewing out rages against the matriarchal machine. I just continued to back-pedal with a series of but..but...but. I assumed my buffed-out body would be a deterrent to such attacks, but alas, while most normal people respect me from afar, some are not worthy.

 

Did I mention that I detest Che shirts, yups in coffe shops, and liberals. Or did I tell you about the guy I roomed with who wore black all the time and was a "labor activist"? No, some other time then. Gotta go.

 

Liven' on the east coast put pathetically posting on CC.

 

Hahaha. Way to go - keep after it.

 

First the bullying by the AARP poster lady, now this. That's it, I've had it. I'm booking my Robert Bly retreat as we speak.

 

I'm not sure how many people have heard this recording, but it reminds me of my own bashing.

 

"While an operations manager employed by Jack in the Box restaurants is commuting to the job one morning, he calls his boss to leave a voicemail message announcing that due to the rainy conditions that morning he'll be late getting into the office. In the middle of the call he witnesses a minor traffic accident in which a lone male motorist runs a red light and clips an Impala occupied by four middle-aged women. Breaking off the explanation for his tardiness, the manager instead launches into a blow-by-blow description of the ensuing mayhem as the motorist gets out of his car and begins berating the four women (even though the accident was clearly his fault). Between bouts of hysterical laughter, the caller recounts the action as the four women assault, poke, and beat the hapless motorist with, variously, pepper spray, an umbrella, a large purse, and a Bible until he finally retreats back to the safety of his car. All of this, of course, is captured by his boss's voicemail account, creating an audio record of the event gleefully forwarded from mailbox to mailbox throughout the company."

 

Click for Recording.

 

 

[Jim]

I was walking across campus the other day when some pointy-headed hippie bumpeded into me. I was surprised because I had just left my workout and my guns were blazing. I recently started lifting pianos as there were not engough weights in the gym. I weigh 110 lbs but can now press 800.

 

I think this dude came straight from his mens sociology class or something as he was extremely belligerent, and started spewing out rages against the matriarchal machine. I just continued to back-pedal with a series of but..but...but. I assumed my buffed-out body would be a deterrent to such attacks, but alas, while most normal people respect me from afar, some are not worthy.

 

Did I mention that I detest Che shirts, yups in coffe shops, and liberals. Or did I tell you about the guy I roomed with who wore black all the time and was a "labor activist"? No, some other time then. Gotta go.

 

Liven' on the east coast put pathetically posting on CC.

 

Ouch!!!

[archenemy]

Women love testoserone.

This is true.

[olyclimber]

I've also heard it from a reliable source that nice guys finish last.

[archenemy]

That's okay, the longer they last, the better.

[JayB]

I was walking across campus the other day when some pointy-headed hippie bumpeded into me. I was surprised because I had just left my workout and my guns were blazing. I recently started lifting pianos as there were not engough weights in the gym. I weigh 110 lbs but can now press 800.

 

I think this dude came straight from his mens sociology class or something as he was extremely belligerent, and started spewing out rages against the matriarchal machine. I just continued to back-pedal with a series of but..but...but. I assumed my buffed-out body would be a deterrent to such attacks, but alas, while most normal people respect me from afar, some are not worthy.

 

Did I mention that I detest Che shirts, yups in coffe shops, and liberals. Or did I tell you about the guy I roomed with who wore black all the time and was a "labor activist"? No, some other time then. Gotta go.

 

Liven' on the east coast put pathetically posting on CC.

 

Ouch!!!

 

I actually think the funniest thing about this is that someone has been following along and meticulously cataloging material, waiting for just_the_right_moment...

 

Maybe when I move back to the PNW for good in 2.5 years maybe the anonymous lurker-rage will have been channelled into satirical screenplay and a full-sized effigy ready for burning in someone's backyard. Too funny.

[olyclimber]

you are definitely being profiled jay. i'll wait for the rock opera.

[Cobra_Commander]

Indeed, everyone waits in eager anticipation for the next tome posted, fainting in delight over every unnecessary adjective constructing the serpentine prose. When I see there is a new post, I like to settle back with a fine wine and a thesaurus. I know it's gonna be awhile.