specialed Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 I wonder who has a better idea of what I actually am like in real life. An extremely ugly and overweight lesbian woman with an annoying laugh? Quote
olyclimber Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 Chapter 2: The Women Now that you've applied the knowledge you've learned in Chapter 1, you're going to need to know how to deal with all the women. You've got to come up with a system for managing all the girleez you're going to be scoopin, because after a while you start forgetting names and whatnot, and that isn't good. And don't lose hope if things don't workout...because you're a "Real Climber" they're all gonna want to hang out with you or go climbing with you...because you're the shit. Top dog. The Big Kahuna. Find a system that works for you and stick with it. For some, a rolodex works. Others prefer a bling-bling PDA. You also may want to look into the newer Smart Phones, which allow for syncing with your desktop contact list. They even have pictures so when they girleez call, you can put a face with the name. Quote
Ireneo_Funes Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 This is getting played. The vest-wearing, tool-dropping, biner-finding, windshirt-recommending, real-climber-defining, Pandora-dating (or not dating, whatever) Girth Pillar straddler is the new "New Smith Rock Guide." It was different when NOLSe didn't seem to enjoy it so much. Quote
John Frieh Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 (edited) Post deleted by NOLSe Edited March 25, 2005 by NOLSe Quote
olyclimber Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 If you don't like it then don't play. This is SPRAY! NOLSe is the new steaksauce. Anyway, I'm working on a book....but just like the new Smith Guide....you don't have to buy it! Quote
Ireneo_Funes Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 Thanks for that picture, NOLSe. I did forget gay, sorry. Not to mention masochistic! Got a picture of that too? Quote
Alpinfox Posted March 25, 2005 Author Posted March 25, 2005 (edited) [picture] Resize your picture NOLSe!!! edit: Ooops. My bad, your dick really is that small. Sorry. Edited March 25, 2005 by Alpinfox Quote
olyclimber Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 Chapter 3: Exhibitionism It is important, as a "Real Climber", to be an exhibitionist. While nochalantly dropping hints about hard climbs you've done, don't stop there. Don't hesitate at the opportunity to post pictures of yourself in various stages of undress on climbing boards. Don't be shy!!! Lets face it, those wannabees really want to know what you look like naked and how small your privates really are. Don't miss out on a geniune opportunity to show off, and let your freak flag fly! Quote
Ireneo_Funes Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 [picture] Resize your picture NOLSe!!! edit: Ooops. My bad, your dick really is that small. Sorry. I also forgot poorly-endowed! Quote
olyclimber Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 Chapter 4: Dealing with the Wannabees When you walk the walk and talk the talk, you're going to have a trail of Wannabee biting at your ankles. Be sure to keep them at bay by taking a day off here and there between your hardman sending and bitchslap the punks. Expose them for what they are: those who either wish they were you, or those who are just jealous of what you mean to the climbing community. Player haters. And don't forget the lesson from Chapter 1. Let your ego guide you. You're man. Keep the comebacks coming. Go for the jugular. Humility is for those who finish second. Quote
John Frieh Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 All The following, though now deleted, is a premium example of why you shouldn't leave your lap top unattended at work and have the "remember me next time I visit cc.com" feature enabled (so you don’t have to supply a password) especially if you work with individuals who have climbed with you the past few years and have seen enough of your posts such that they can effectively imitate you. My deepest apologies for any strife my unattended avatar caused. I hope that it doesn’t happen again. Quote
swaterfall Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah the old co-worker/climbing partner, with access to my computer, cc.com account and all of my pics; posting as me and unbeknownst to me for hours before I finally found out and deleted all my <ahem> their posts, trick. I never get tired of that one. Quote
olyclimber Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 Chapter 5: Denial There will be times when you've got to step down from the throne to take care of private matters. In these cases, you may want to declare that someone who "looks just like you" has stolen your identity. Depending on how far you've gone, you may want to just declare that your identity was stolen from its inception.....thus giving you the ability to start afresh. Welcome to CC.com NOLSe! Quote
olyclimber Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 All The following, though now deleted, is a premium example of why you shouldn't leave your lap top unattended at work and have the "remember me next time I visit cc.com" feature enabled (so you don’t have to supply a password) especially if you work with individuals who have climbed with you the past few years and have seen enough of your posts such that they can effectively imitate you. My deepest apologies for any strife my unattended avatar caused. I hope that it doesn’t happen again. This doesn't sound like NOLSe! Who is playing trickses! Quote
minx Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 Chapter 5: Denial There will be times when you've got to step down from the throne to take care of private matters. In these cases, you may want to declare that someone who "looks just like you" has stolen your identity. Depending on how far you've gone, you may want to just declare that your identity was stolen from its inception.....thus giving you the ability to start afresh. Welcome to CC.com NOLSe! what you're really saying is that the first step to recovery is admitting that you have a problem. come on, NOLSe just admit it, sometimes people get the better of you. Now have a beer and a laugh and we'll all move on. Quote
Ireneo_Funes Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 (edited) Chapter 5: Denial There will be times when you've got to step down from the throne to take care of private matters. In these cases, you may want to declare that someone who "looks just like you" has stolen your identity. Depending on how far you've gone, you may want to just declare that your identity was stolen from its inception.....thus giving you the ability to start afresh. This chapter really gets to the heart of hyper-alpinism. You'll need to put something in there about how to create a posse of multiple identities (named after actors from popular TV programs, of course) to bolster chestbeating claims. Edited June 12, 2006 by jon Quote
Alpinfox Posted March 25, 2005 Author Posted March 25, 2005 This is the second week in a row with good weather during the week and a pissy weather forecast for the weekend. This working thing sucks. GODDAMNIT!!! Thank you for allow annoyed fox to vent. So back to the original topic of this thread. The weather forecast for the weekend has gotten even WORSE! What am I supposed to do this weekend? My socks are already alphabetized! Quote
olyclimber Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 Yes I'm bein' followed by a rain shadow rain shadow rain shadow. Leapin' and hoppin' on a rain shadow rain shadow rain shadow. And if I ever lose my hands lose my power lose my land - Oh if I ever lose my hands Ooh I won't have to work no more. And if I ever lose my eyes if my colours all run dry Yes if I ever lose my eyes Ooh I won't have to cry no more. Yes I'm bein' followed by a rain shadow rain shadow rain shadow. Leapin' and hoppin' on a rain shadow rain shadow rain shadow. And if I ever lose my legs I won't moan and I won't beg Oh if I ever lose my legs Ooh I won't have to walk no more. And if I ever lose my mouth all my teeth North and South Yes if I ever lose my mouth Ooh I won't have to talk. Did it take long to find me? I asked the faithful light. Did it take long to find me and are you gonna stay the night? I'm bein' followed by a rain shadow rain shadow rain shadow. Leapin' und hoppin' on a rain shadow rain shadow rain shadow. rain shadow rain shadow rain shadow rain shadow. Quote
Dr_Flash_Amazing Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 The rain falls hard on a humdrum town This town has dragged you down Oh, the rain falls hard on a humdrum town This town has dragged you down Oh, no, and everybody’s got to live their life And God knows I’ve got to live mine God knows I’ve got to live mine William, William it was really nothing William, William it was really nothing It was your life ... How can you stay with a fat girl who’ll say Oh! Would you like to marry me? And if you like you can buy the ring She doesn’t care about anything Would you like to marry me ? And if you like you can buy the ring I don’t dream about anyone - except myself Oh, William, William, it was really nothing Quote
DirtyHarry Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 Vantage, Smiff, or just drink and chase ho's. Quote
swaterfall Posted March 25, 2005 Posted March 25, 2005 Soggy bottom 's Complaining about the weather is not very hyper or exptreeemo Quote
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