Chaps

"500 Slogs under 500 Feet" By Phil McKracken "Climb Your 40m and Shut Up" By Harold Balazcks

do you happen to have some gear you'd like to sell?

some morning i don't even get out of bed.

I got the new Suunto watch for flatlands. Altimeter measures up to 500 feet in height.

Yeah, how come they didn't call before they started to climb when they had better cellphone service? And about your story, funny thing is just the other day I had a boulder sized car come flying down a hill at me. So I got out of the road. Go Vikings!

I don't know how they climb the big mountains like Hood and "Raindog" as you guys call it, but it sounds like from what I have read on this board that you should bring an icepick for chipping out a "Y" symbol if you get lost in the forest of either of those mountains. Godbless SAR and may the Lord Shine on Them and Keep Them in His Grace. Hello from Minnesota! I haven't forgot about you guys out there!

Finally, my kind of poster. Jon, you and I should get together and create a new board without all the fluff. Serious posts only, and climbing resumes required to separate the men from the boys.

Not a good analogy. More like Macs are like having sex with a very expensive hooker who knows what she is doing. Linux is the ugly girl next door...free and gets the job done...and you know you're a geek if you're bragging about hitting that stuff.

PRG employee "Smokey McWeede" talking to late, drunk registrant for PDX Ice Fest "I'm sorry Mr.Steve-House-Who-Climbed-Nanga-Parbat-And-Shit... We don't allow climbing above 8ft without certification that you are a competent climber. Don't worry though, I can check ya out real quick. Here. Hold this Gri-Gri."

THANKS FOR CHANGING THE WORLD YOU GUYS! It is clearly a better place now.

Posting on a Internet Bulletin Board is ACTION. Why else would my fingers get tired?

HI-HO LOSERS! Like you guys could make a difference with your petty arguements. The heartland is running the country. Your west coast opinions don't matter.

I bet you're from Minnesota too. It shows in your restraint.

You mean those routes on the outside of the gym? They said I could start belaying out there after I finish the rehab and community service. Gotta break out the big rope for those 50m jobs. I was just testing the breaking strength of dyneema vs. spectra in the front yard using my car. I can tell you that either one of them are stronger then my front bumper.

I bet you don't even know the difference, do you? But don't worry..."It's all good".

Have you tested it to make sure it is spectra? It might actually be dyneema.

Oh...and in case you haven't guessed by now, I also post as Steven Seagal.

By now most of you have figured out that I am Jack Osborne, adrenaline junkie. You guys have to check out Depth Charge, from some time I spent climbing in Croatia with Sharma. That dude can party like my dad did. He smoked like an ounce in one weekend. I seriously wanted to join him, but after the seven-day detox involving colonic irrigation twice a day I got in Thailand, I didn't want to get the shaft again. I had a tube up my ass twice a day and five litres of coffee was poured in. Anyway, check it out: http://www.actionsportsvideos.com/climb.html Oh ya, have any of you taken up climbing yet?

" This IP address has been banned from the board. "

E-Rock, was that you with a wig on down at the tasty freeze? Geesh!

I don't care what you say about the guy, he is a total pervert. I can't believe he calls the midwest his home! http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=suckin'+on+a+chili+dog&defid=1867739

Do you have any pictures of the booty? Or how about just some pictures of booty in general?

Thats like $1 Canadian, right?

That's Mr. Assclown to you.

How was he? Isn't he that little Japanese baseball player?