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Dechristo

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Everything posted by Dechristo

  1. So THAT'S where Dorothy's ruby-red slippers came from!
  2. Gary, beware of your prospective in-laws tactics: My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year when we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, and my friends encouraged me. My girlfriend? She was a dream! There was only one thing bothering me. That one thing was her younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight miniskirts, and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when near me, and I got many a pleasant view of her underwear. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else. One day little sister calls and asks me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she could not overcome and did not really want to overcome. She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and could not say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me." I was stunned; I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs. When she reached the top, she pulled down her underwear and threw them down the stairs at me. I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house and walked straight toward my car. My future father-in-law was standing outside. With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We could not ask for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family!" The moral of this story is: Always keep your condoms in your car.
  3. Dechristo

    bomb threat

    I'm glad to hear that... ...I'd rather be dead than get shot there.
  4. Dechristo

    They found

  5. Dechristo

    They found

    Insightful.
  6. ... little Chappy poppin' out, wigglin', covered with meconium, uttering unintelligible syllables, shittin' his britches... The more things change, the more they stay the same.
  7. GAWD, that's disgusting thinkin' 'bout Chaps' parents "gettin' busy"!
  8. Don't you wish your parents hadn't been so "busy" nine-months before you were born?
  9. Chaps has some fluff for your present, and thread-drift for your future.
  10. thread-drifter
  11. I gave birth to some Chaps an hour ago.
  12. Fluff-monger.
  13. ...and the Church Lady says,"isn't that special".
  14. X-nay on the fluff-ay, Chapsay.
  15. Dechristo

    mmmmm....sticky

    Common pathology among racy HA women climbers: frozen speach on blue boobies.
  16. ...belongs in the Racing racist thread.
  17. Raciest? Racist? Jokes of Racy Racists? "So this Klu Klux Klanswoman in a low-cut dress walks into a bar and..."
  18. gee ya think? now you are just being sarcastic. and.....? your point is? Under my hat. shush! no one was talking to you anymore. Now, you're talking through your hat.
  19. You should feel right at home.
  20. Dechristo

    mmmmm....sticky

    mmmm....frozen speach Spoken like a true alpinista.
  21. gee ya think? now you are just being sarcastic. and.....? your point is? Under my hat.
  22. Dechristo

    mmmmm....sticky

    speach -passion fruit Speach is, by definition, a fruit of passion. (See: Freedom of Speach thread)
  23. You, yourself, You.
  24. I call sarcasm.
  25. He was also born with abnormally-ribbed palms.
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