Dechristo

My wife takes that stuff before we have sex.

It was a sure bet you'd enjoy it. Or did you start these exams early?

Like that version of War and Peace.

A squid with manboobs. Now that's freak show shit!

Mustard gas

lactating?

I always hear squid in the bar claiming they have eight arms and two schlongs.

I did not enjoy my prostate exam today. During my medical exam, the Physician's ASSistant, a woman, suggested I take advantage of her small fingers (compared to a man's) and have her perform the procedure. I have attained the age when insurance companies require this check; I'd never had it done before. I assumed the position and...HELLO!!! I swear, the bitch fisted me and went in up to her bicep (is there a medical school in Enumclaw?). After she withdrew, I weakly asked if she were done. "Yes." I said, "Good, I'm glad you're not gonna ask that a couple of doctors confirm your findings." She replied, 'I could ask that Dr. Bob come in and check. Of course, your gonna wonder why you feel both of his hands on your shoulders while he's "checking".' When I got home, my wife asked, "did they made you put your feet in the stirrups?" See what all you fucks have to look forward to if you live long enough? Goddammit! Now I'm hearing whispers of "colonoscopy". Well, fuck me with camera on a hose. Make your appointments...

see how you are?

I'm guessin' the dude with eight arms.

Maybe it'd been less subtle if I'd stated, "yoo'r duing it ahn perpuss". How can you misspell "dilemma", unless it's intentional, when it's right above where you're typing?!

She demands extra pay for that

you're doing it on purpose

I love messages. The oiled skin, the soft background music, my eyes closed as the messeuse deftly straightens my muscle...

On the horns of a dilemma?

The Pistons' jockstrap adjuster.

Wistful is wasteful.

A cheap slut's box is rarely empty.

So THAT'S where Oly learned his flying technique! But, don't the passengers in front of "the pilot" object to the dowsing with Salivanet hairspray?

...is The Carpenters of the new millenium.

Seen Kill Bill 2? Did you find Darryl Hannah's eyeball squishing up between Uma's toes entertaining?

Have an Austrian give it to her hot, long, and hard.

Bungle, I prescribe the viewing of the movie "Fearless". ...Motownhead has already gone to bed. Too late.

"Rights" are a product of political manufacture. "Rights" are only as real as the socio/political environment allows. It's well and good to ascribe to Man idealistic "rights" he should be allowed to enjoy, but that doesn't amount to jack for most of the world's population through history. You can argue of the certainty of "rights" due you and mankind while you're dragged from your car, beaten, and robbed. But, the efficacy of your arguement evaporates with your consciousness when the reality-bearing bullet enlightens your brain. In a world where few decide the law for all, it all hinges upon who decides what "truths to be self-evident".

You must have a better monitor. I can't see the surface of the cow's tongue.