Dechristo

Beauty

Hey Bratt, check out minnesotaclimbing.com

Cordless drills are the saving grace of our culture.

Whatever gets your rocks off.

Congratulations on your first erection and discovering it's "special purpose".

nobody's hearin' nothin'

Yeah, don't brake 'em if you want 'em to run fast.

psssst,dudes... don't piss-off the librarian

My brother is an airline pilot based out of Atlanta. The following is of an encounter he had with airport security: After dutifully submitting to the pocket-emptying shoeless trek through the TSA line, he retreived his items only to discover his Zippo lighter had been confiscated. He approached the security personnell in his airline captain uniform and asked what had become of the years-old constant companion to his pocket. TSA: "We can't allow lighters on the flight." Bro: "You realize I'm the one flying the plane?" TSA" "Sir, a lighter is a dangerous item and we can't allow you to take it on the plane." Bro: "Well, then you'd better take my hands as they're potentially dangerous items, too; they could be used to steer the jet into the ground." TSA: "Well, uh, someone might force their way into the cockpit, take the lighter from you, and then be armed with it." Bro: "Oh, I see. I guess you're gonna go into the cockpit, then, and take the flare gun and Crash Axe that are in there?" TSA: "Sir, I'm just doing my job." He never did get his Zippo back.

Richard's sign refers to the common euphemism for penis.

Certified in a Minnesota Uberbelayer Seminar. Chaps signed his sheepskin.

She wasn't trying. Otherwise, she might have said this is the only way you could wear it:

Frummunda cheese?

Minx the quiet...

Big Johhhhhnnnnn. Big Bad John.

"...get the calf-puller, this heifer's presentin' a breach..."

Diesel prices have gone crazy... it's messin'-up my personal hygiene regimen. Gonna have to change my weekly delousing soak to fortnightly.

BigWallin?

take a homoseltzer

more like "slow gun"

Magic Bus

that could work. I mean it's mean to seek a mean in meaningfullness in mean meaninglessness of feelings; know what I mean?