Dr_Flash_Amazing

Really? Did he dent the shit out of it, or just sort of slide under the thing? Did he damage his own vehicle at all? In any case, it's impressive that he was ballsy enough to take direct guerilla action against a doubtless intoxicated and looking for a brawl Trailblazer and his prized wastewagon. Kudos!

Really? In DFA's opinion, Hamm's has a bit better flavor. But then again, you're paying an extra dime a can or so for that flavor. But it's worth it. Plus, everyone and their [insert house pet] is jocking the PBR for all it's worth these days. They're probably selling that shit down at Hot Topic for eight bucks a sixer. In any case, the cans (the wiiiiide-mouth cans) are beckoning. It could be time soon!

They're starting to spread like the SARS! Time for desperate measures; quarantines, mercy-killings and the like. Man, the bass line on 'One Step to Slip' is just fuckin' slamming on vinyl. RockrockrockrockROCK!

Dumbass ... err, RobJob; that's the cc.com "no image" image. Everyone who has no avy image has one of them gray-dude-with-question-mark thingies. And DFA doesn't do multiple avatars. That's for chickenshit poseurs. Is it time for a Hamm's yet?

See you down at Whole Foods Market around noon, then? You wanna bring the gas, or the rags and bottles?

someone's in charge??? i thought we were all fascist anarchists (insert greamlin of swaztika wearing, eugene-cop beating smiley face) got an invitation to go to Anarchy Camp there will be twistin' fistin' biting fighting all in an evening the soundtrack will go multi-platinum barbecue a Boca while the effigies burn you may not wanna stay to see how we take care of a turncoat christiana's kinda far away so come along with me we can dance and trip and be anarchists gotta get the manual and put it in the oven 'til it cooks then we're gonna take the ashes to the wassail and use them to spike the punch rules of anarchy camp: reckless abandonment and random acts of dumbness will be rewarded if you see somebody takin' charge, you'll be expected to beat them cuz everyone who's no one will be participating no one who is someone will ever get to know the joys of anarchism destruction of the system, yeah so come along with us salad days and nights on the anarchaic bus gonna pick up indigents and crusties and a half a dozen nuts and we're never comin' home underwater basket-weaving methamphetamine symposium african killer spelling bees bowling in ice-hockey rinks anarchy camp's never inert (you think we don't know that it's) not much fun 'til someone gets hurt (our only motto) so we're greasin' up the rusty vert ramp time to make some reservations for next year's anarchy camp

Now, now, cascadeclamberers would sink like a stone sans the buoying jay-nay-say-kwah of Dr. Flash Amazing's pricelessly witty banter. Better that you should be sponsoring the Doctor's PDXPC visits with free pitchers and gas money.

Sounds like some kind of desperate goob who's just looking for any excuse to tell people about how he whacks off. What a pervo!

Speaking of overcompensating, DFA was out running some errands on Monday, and damned if he didn't see five of them new Hummer H2s within about a 10-block radius. All of them in downtown Portland, all of them spotless. One of them was apparently on its way to a dealer on the back of its very own flatbed tow truck, and was sporting the big (22" or so?) chrome wheels and super-duper-offroad low-profile tires. Even the tie-downs on the back bumper were chrome. So apparently there's a bunch of insecure smalldickers rollin' tuff in the Pearl district in their I-use-more-gas-in-a-mile-than-you-will-all-day-and-I-could-drive-this-thing-straight-up-Mt. Hood-but-I'd-hate-to-sully-my-freshly-waxed-paint-or-get-dirt-on-my-24"-tires Hummers. In case anyone happens to be down there, you know, and wants to put a gallon of gas to good use and serve up some Roast Hummer a la Molotov.

That looks like a great time if you're an engineer or are of a similarly geekish ilk. Looks like someone got high and fucked around with Enercalc too much or something.

veggi, you and I both know that liberals are all premature ejaculators. But is this better or worse than the republicans who can't get it up in the first place?

That phrase has been used before. Who was it that used that before? It was one of the youngsters as I recall. T'was I. Lying sack. It was none other than Dr. Flash Amazing who didst utter the aforementioned phrase in reference to the alleged cave dweller. For sooth!

Metal up your Trask?

Yes, that makes perfect sense. First it was: there's plenty of evidence of WMDs, but we can't tell you what it is. Then it's: we've found lots of WMDs, but we can't tell you what, where, or how many. That would at least be consistent, if nothing else ...

If the New York Times is lying, then where's the story about all the WMDs they're finding in yonder Iraq, genius? Oh, no stories about that, huh? Maybe 'cause there isn't shit over there and the only place Iraq's WMDs ever existed was in G. Bush Jr's head? Hmm ...

How 'bout "CASCADECLIMBERS.COM" in Metallica type letters, with "HORSECOCK UP YOUR ASS" and the hand sticking out of the toilet with horsecock logo like the old Metallica t-shirt?

His point, trask, is that Bush and co. are full of shit. The simple and obvious solution is that either the president and his henchmen should not lie about such important issues as why we go to war. If he is incapable of doing so (apparently the case), he should pack up his cowboy boots and take his ass back to Texas!

Sadly (damn sadly), La Luna is now ... an office building. After several incarnations as various other clubs and then again as La Luna, they went tits up a year or so ago.

It's past midnight. Do you know where your mother is? www.cascadeclimbers.com

Sorry about that. The AmazingCo, Inc. Litigation Department sort of has a mind of its own, and has been known to get a little suit-happy. They're on the verge of taking down Microsoft because their monopolization of the software market too closely mimics Dr. Flash Amazing's monopolization of the spray market. Vicious bunch of pitbulls, they are. Oh, and here's a place that does stickerage for what seems to be pretty cheap: http://www.contagiousgraphics.com/Stickers/stickers.html Last DFA knew, they would give you a discount if you mentioned these guys: http://www.gimetzco.com

To quote Mr. Pete Miser, former MC of the pretty much defunked 5 Fingers of Funk, "say 'heck no!' to techno!"

You're so cruel, you heartless animal!

cascadeclimbers.com Your source for Dr. Flash Amazing since 2002! Or how 'bout: Dr. Flash Amazing made me look like an idiot on cascadeclimbers.com! Or: cascadeclimbers.com Spray now, work later!

No, no, here's an even better idea. How about when one of these jerkbags decides to run for the nation's top office, they don't spout off a bunch of bullshit about how they're going to save the nation's education system when what they really mean is they're going to save the rich a few bil' in taxes while they flush the remaining tax dollars on military spending and then sit back and watch while America's schools compost. How about that?

*engaging the Trasktronix Soberizer Translatotron 5000* "Hey DFA, I was jerking it into a sock the other night when my dog bit me on the ass and I fell off the toilet and bonked my head on the tub. While I was out, I dreamed that you had won the Nobel Prize for both peace and literature. Is that true?" Sorry, Trask, it's not true, although, incidentally, DFA is on the Nobel Economics Prize committee. You ought to submit an entry this year, maybe the Doctor can pull some strings, get you that fame and recognition you've been desperately pining for. 'Til then, keep in mind that diazepam and oxycodone are a potentially dangerous combination, especially on a quart of gin!