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ivan

could an atlas rocket...

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...carry you, your personal effects, and most importantly, the quantity of alcohol you'd require to survive a 2 year stint to mars and back?

 

would there be enough volume in the space craft itself to store that many boxes of franzia?

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Only if you limit booze in the bar to 200-proof varieties. You can add ice cubes to your drink from processed water on board(piss). :brew:

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Just bring some astroturf, if you know what I'm saying. I bet that shit grows fine in microgravity.

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Such a voyage requires sacrifice. LSD Sunday Morning Services Only. Talk to the Reverend.

 

The largest Atlas payload is 5 m in diameter. Basically, you're sealed in a 2 story bedroom for 501 days with your crew mates. I suppose every now and then you could crawl around the outside for a change of scenery.

 

I would think enormous amounts of vaporization would be essential to crew survival. The garden would likely be the crew's number one priority during cruise phase.

 

I guess these guys are just gonna take the rads like real men. They're DNA's gonna look like swiss cheese.

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Ban shrooms, though. No need to increase paranoia risk above the risk that the crew actually wakes up to what's most likely in store for them.

 

Actually, though, they can probably make it fine. One Russki's already spent a total of 801 days in space, 437 days in one go, so the 501 days isn't such a huge leap. The Mars500 crew of six spent 520 days couped up together on earth - but the living space was 3x what these guys would have on this trip.

 

If you don't land the navigation is straightforward and the fuel requirement is low. Stick a booster onto a couple of Destiny ISS modules and blast the fuck off. If you're gonna stuff 6 guys into one of these things

Edited by tvashtarkatena

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Basically, you're sealed in a 2 story bedroom for 501 days with your crew mates. I suppose every now and then you could crawl around the outside for a change of scenery.

 

You're describing my life with two kids in the duplex :laf:

 

I bet radiation exposure on the way to Mars is worse than orbiting the Earth, but I just pulled that fact out of my ass. Seems reasonable

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Actually, no, it couldn't. You'd have to tack on a Centaur on top of the Atlas, and even then you wouldn't get to take a lot of extra luggage.

 

 

You weren't planning on coming back, were you? That's a whole other question.

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i'd just be alarmed if, god forbid, my calculations for the essential burgundy were badly off, that i'd be stuck sipping off the rocket fuel for the burn back home :)

 

if there was no thought of a return trip though, name the craft the "uss hunter thompson," paint it purple n' pack it full of every drug known to man for the party of century! :toad::rawk:

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I read this all on the internet:

 

Alcohol: Too much weight. If absolutely necessary it's gotta be Everclear and Tang. Feck is too optimistic. Everclear is only about 180 proof. Beer and burgundy are out cuz the weight and "rent" is out of the question in space.

 

Uppers: Out out out and again out. Do not work well in enclosed spaces with lots of time involved.

 

Psychadelics: Might be good or bad depending on psychiatric analysis in advance which the partakers rarely do. The good news is there is no liquid and no calories. The bad news is you might try to find the escape hatch before arriving.

 

Downers: May be fine if nothing needs to ever be done. Which is probably not the case.

 

Solution: Space is not for mind altering anything but the mountains and your couch can be.

Edited by matt_warfield

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if french scientists can do anything, they oughta be able to figure a way to turn my piss back into cheap wine?

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travel to mars- wtf? they can't even figure out how to built a decent rail system. and after landing, what exactly would they use as a rocket to brake beyond gravity of mars for a return trip?

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I just want to get to Venus so I can figure women out before I die. It may take a lot of alcohol and drugs but it hasn't helped so far.

Edited by matt_warfield

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if french scientists can do anything, they oughta be able to figure a way to turn my piss back into cheap wine?

 

1) They dislike Americans

2) They do not have cheap wine (MD 2020 and Thunderbird are all American).

3) They may have thought of a way to turn piss back into wine but the Geneva Convention may not have allowed it.

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burgundy's like, 3$/liter - just 'cuz it's cheap don't mean it's gotta be boones, dood. :)

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This is all bullshit. If any of you had any real experience with what you're talking about, you'd know that with a case of Thunderbird you can make a serious attempt at the voyage with just a stack of old cardboard boxes in your ex-wife's back yard. Fucking posers.

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This is all bullshit. If any of you had any real experience with what you're talking about, you'd know that with a case of Thunderbird you can make a serious attempt at the voyage with just a stack of old cardboard boxes in your ex-wife's back yard. Fucking posers.

funny, my partner of last summer made the same attempt under the influence of :toad: - he didnt' actually stick the landing, sadly :(

 

thunderbird's mean. the last time i pissed my pants woulda been 1977 were it not for one ugly night on that train...

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SpaceX Falcon Heavy rocket: for 128M you get twice the lift of the Space Shuttle.

 

You could probably do the proposed trip for the cost of the Cassini probe - 3 billion or so. Space comes cheaper these days with so many off the shelf components. Plus, what a reality show. No space walks, though; no spacesuits. Ya fix it from the inside or not at all.

 

I wouldn't laugh it off. They have a tight window though: a low fuel trajectory like 2018 only comes around every 15 years.

Edited by tvashtarkatena

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any particuliar reason we can't use midgets - tywin lannister would be a capital feller for this here endeavour, and his wine needs ought to be down-scaleable as well :)

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I would totally watch a reality TV show based on midgets drinking wine while flying in space to Mars and back. Do you think they would fight????

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burgundy's like, 3$/liter - just 'cuz it's cheap don't mean it's gotta be boones, dood. :)

 

Do the analysis of Steel Reserve beer on cost/benefit ratio against your cheap wine. I'm always open to suggestions but also require stats.

 

Okay, the game is on. In Bozeman, SR beer is $1.69 per 24 fl ounces at 8.1% alcohol. For alcohol per dollar value I am all ears. But most local marts know what I am talking about.

 

Bud Light, and Miller Light, regardless of how many clever commercials are made, will make a lot of money while the "smart" drink cheap burgundy or Steel Reserve and climb rocks instead of couches or beds or your friend's Mom.

 

I wonder what Congress drinks and what they climb and whether any single one of them would be willing to go to Mars?

 

 

Edited by matt_warfield

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pretty certain most of the tea party folks got off at mars to take a leak before continuing on to uranus, to count its many rings :)

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In Bozeman, SR beer is $1.69 per 24 fl ounces at 8.1% alcohol. For alcohol per dollar value I am all ears. But most local marts know what I am talking about.

 

the exotic vintages of peter vella n' franzia weigh in at 12% and about 3$/32 ozs - hopefully someone who majored in an actual science can do the analysis. on the other hand, they don't take like lightly carbonated piss n' make you bust ass every 5 minutes, plus you can make excellent sauces ... :)

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