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Lamest Climbing Jargon


Dwayner

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Evening,lads. At least it's evening here. Wait a minute, I've got me sunglasses on. Ahh much better. 'afternoon, lads! Been doing some thinkin. I rarely read the climbing rags anymore because a) they suck, b)they´re full of yawn-worthy "news" about sport-climbing and such c)their real aim is to sell us CRAP d)they suck (did I mention that they suck?) but the point of this is that much of their attempts at keeping our interest are full of goofy-ass neo-climbing jargon that makes me embarassed to be involved. I know there are others out there too that feel an annoying tug on the short hairs everytime you read that crap, or worse yet, run into people who after a five minute try-out in a climbing "gym", are spoutin' the lingo like it was their mother tongue.

How bout some nominations? Here's a few for starters.

First, an old one: "manky"..an obscure bit of British slang which made a splashing American debut in the back of Royal Robbin's Basic Rockcraft (or maybe it was Advanced Rockcraft - two splendid little volumes by the way). There was some little tale in which an old rusty bolt, I recall, was referred to as manky. And so this odd word got passed around as if it were some sort of piece of standard mountaineering terminology, when in fact it only identified those who had read the book.

Next: "Take!" as in old-school "Tension". I won't climb with anyone who yells "take", a term which has become part of the standard equipage of the sport-climber, and is therefore loaded with all of the baggage therefrom. (Perhaps worse yet are those affected fools who yell "Allez" at the "Comps". You know who I'm talking about, don't you Pope!)

But the grand award goes to the newly ubiquitous adjective "sick", which I assume means scary and difficult, but is actually a sickening term itself.

Now just to head off you contrarians, let's save a few posts with the following anticipatory responses:

- I ain't stopping you from talking;

- You can call me narrow-minded for not wanting to climb with "takers" but I climb for the fun of it, not to be irritated by my climbing partner's jargon-prone mouth.

- Yes, maybe I am easily irritated.

- blah, blah, blah, blah....now offer some of your own nominations or second mine.

love and hugs,

- Dwayner

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Send (especially offensive if combined with Dude)- I might just hurl if I ever again have to hear a crowd of sport-kids yelling "send it! send it now!! duuude!!!!"

Hinky- A word we tech-geeks might use to refer to a problematic printer has somehow crossed over into the climbing lexicon. It's lame.

Dicey- a good word, but way overused. I climbed with one guy that would say on nearly every move of every lead- "watch me here, this is dicey". After a while it loses its effect.

& I agree with "Take"... when you're a full pitch above your partner on Traveller Buttress, and all you can hear is the wind howling past your ears, a distant yell of "Take" sounds an awful lot like "Slack", and could (but I'm not saying did) lead to misunderstanding and unpleasant results.

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How's this for lame: RETROBOLT

Probably won't hear people spraying that one though, unless the mags start saying it's cool. Then you'll get this exchange:

"Yo brah, I just got a hyper sick new Hilti, and I'm gonna fully retrobolt that jingus trad line, it'll have hella bolts when I get done"

"Well don't do it yet, dude...let me sharpen the chisel first and we can get rid of that stupid finger lock and put a dope drive-by to a supersloper move there instead"

Lest I be considered a hypocrite,Let me make it know that I've written letters to the mags before and I authored an article that will be in the Aug R&I. Gotta make money somehow and what better way to pay for my haul ropes than with some sport climber's money via the mags?

I gotta agree about the commercialism in the mags, it's pretty rampant in media in general (can you tell I'm anti-consumer culture?) but it seems even more sacriligious when it's around the sport I pursue to "get away from it all"

On a related note, a frequent partner of mine covers all the logos on his clothing with some tent repair tape...says they aren't paying him to be an advertisement and the only way he'll show the logos is if he's getting some form of sponsorship from them.

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You guys rock! Excellent, but oh so disturbing!

Never heard of "hinky" (isn't that the name of the guy who shot Reagan way back when?) I think if I ever heard my climbing buddy use the word "hinky", I'd run for my hanky so I could pukey!!!

Kyle, m'man: thanks for mentioning "send", pal. Now I'm gonna have nightmares for another week!

I just thought of another gagger...a veritable prince of lameness: "SKETCH", and its royal bastard offspring: "sketchy" and worse yet, "sketch-fest".

Willy...you rule for bringing up the logo thing. I try to do the same thing if I can get rid of the label without wrecking the garment. Tape sounds like the sensible solution. You're dang right!!! Unless REI or whoever wants to give me free gear or pay me to be a walking billboard, why should I PAY THEM for my free advertising. By the way, everybody knows that when Dwayner, Kyle, Willie and their pals show up, the kids take notice and sales of the particular garments du jour increase 10 fold. What we should do is wear our underwear on the outside and hang out at Exit 38. Come back two weeks later and watch the show!

TAKE!!!!!

- Dwayner

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Choss- I don't care what you say this is a climbing only word. Bad quality rock would sum it up.

Monodigit- One finger. Some surfer\nerd mentality thought it up I bet.

Tweak- (you name it).

Crimp- Small finger holds. I first thought "what shrimp??!!"

Dyno- Dynamic move. Or gymnastic. Why not just lunge.?

Paste- Smear = no footholds = friction

Tinker- Mess with your pro a bunch until it looks good.

Dime Edge- Referring to holds that are the size of a 10 cent pieces edge. Small holds.

[This message has been edited by Cpt.Caveman (edited 06-19-2001).]

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Thought I'd help the old-timers with some the jargon used to describe climbing at today's cutting edge!

PROJECT (noun, as in, "Been workin' my project, dude."): Any climb which is desperately too difficult for you, but which you are determined to "free", style compromises notwithstanding. (Projects cannot be aid climbs, but one is allowed an enormous amount of aid whilst climbing one's project.....huh?). As a rule, a project may be as small as a boulder, or even the addition of a sit-start; it is understood that "sending" the project reserves the sender a page in mountaineering history, right next to Royal Robbins.

BACKSTEP (verb, as in, "Dude, you need to backstep with the left foot and flag with the right."): The application of body weight to the out side edge of the rock boot's toe box. Prior to American subscription to sport climbing methods, NOBODY HAD EVER USED THE OUTSIDE OF HIS BOOT ON A ROCK CLIMB.

DROP-KNEE (noun, as in, "Dude, I sank into a drop-knee to set up for a sick and rude crimp fest.") I was completely mistaken. The first time I heard this term, I was pretty sure somebody was about to deliver a BJ! Imagine my disappointment. Anyway, this one's a bit difficult to describe, but just imagine Morissey in leotards trying to work out a stubborn turd.

 

 

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also - what the hell is "pro" ? once upon a time, "pro" meant a guide, or maybe a sponsored climber (yeah, those have been around for a while, just that it used to require going on some remote expeditionary venture...) long live natural language, to hell with jargon!!! climbers haven't invented any processes that weren't previously used by sailors and construction workers for a couple of centuries (or more) so why do we need new verbiage???

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You guys are killing me here. Chossy, sketchy, manky...so those are all out? How the hell are you supposed to describe anything then? Poor quality rock just takes too damn long to say. And tweak, that's the most versatile word in the English language. When anything is not quite right, it's tweaked. That's my favorite medical self-diagnosis. And if you try to fix something, you're tweaking it. And before anyone jumps on me, I'm definitely not a pink lycra tight wearing, retro-bolting, sporto-climbing, gym monkey.

I once heard an old timer (in his 60's)use the word "interesting" to describe a really nasty traverse, coming down from Ingraham Flats to Cathedral Rocks w/ iced up snow and 60-70 mph winds trying to pluck us off the side of the mountain. Is that word a little easier for you to stomach than chossy, manky, sketchy, etc.?

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In the immortal words of Sargeant Hulka, "Lighten up, Francis."

Most folks I've come across would do well to learn that brevity is a virtue. I, for one, can immediately appreciate that "manky" summarizes, rather concisely, a phrase along the lines of "that shit-ass, rusty, fucking last-century, useless motherfucking pin protecting the crux move . . ."

Or is the word "crux" anathema now as well?

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With all this jargon there must be some pretty confused non-climbers out there...

Non climber hearing this:

"Dude, I was fully in a backstep just camped on a dime, when the tweaker got too painful so I highsteped, used the drop knee and finally sent"

Non climber interprets it as this:

"I was out on the backporch, sitting on the steps just smoking from my dime bag when the girl tweaking my nipples twisted too hard so I got on the top step and told her to get on her knees and I finally got off"

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An architect friend of mine learned that a client had done a number of first ascents back in the '70's. In a conversation, my friend commented, "Wow, sounds like you were quite the big wall climber." The client replied, "Back then, we called it rock climbing."

I agree, the "trad" and "sport" designations disturb me as well. May I suggest calling the former "rock climbing", and calling the latter "rock raping".

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Well, I kind of like a lot of the words mentioned so far (where i come from, they're called "synonyms" rather than "jargon"... I mean, come on, dime edge is actually pretty descriptive.)

But Pope, you'll appreciate this, at sport crags, when someone has failed to the point of not being able to continue on their "project", they call down to their belayer "dirt me," to be lowered to the ground. perhaps it is their subconscious shame at this kind of climbing, that they feel dirty? wink.gif

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Hey all;

Perhaps I'm missing something, or perhaps about to shift this into the Spray catagory.

What is the problem between sport and trad (if I'm still allowed to say that) climbers that causes such angst?? Would you really say the things that you say here online to someone in real life?? Some people like one thing. Some people like another. Yes grid bolting is bad, but there are alot worse things to complain about than $6 worth of metal bolted to the rock. Like Bush's environmental policy (or lack thereof) as it is probably doing more damage to the areas that you are trying to save from humanity.

Not that I'm stirring the pot or anything.

Paul

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A revised description of a recent climb conforming to the politically-correct, anti-jargon atmosphere of this post:

"I positioned my right leg behind me to use counter pressure to keep myself positioned on the rock face while I reached up quickly for a very small and thin hand hold that I could only get two fingers on. The quality of the rock was very bad. I could tell that it lacked the proper quantities of silicon that would bond it together well. My last spring-loaded camming device was very far below me and situated at an angle unconducive to holding a large amount of kilo-newtons. I was scared. I pulled up hard on the very small hand hold and managed to reach up higher to a very large handhold. It was a very interesting climb."

Excitement just eminates from the words, doesn't it.

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quote:

Originally posted by Paul C:

What is the problem between sport and trad (if I'm still allowed to say that) climbers that causes such angst??

...there are alot worse things to complain about than $6 worth of metal bolted to the rock. Like Bush's environmental policy

Not that I'm stirring the pot or anything.

Paul

Can't we have a little fun busting on the jargon slingers without someone getting their panties all bunched up? Hell, I'm ridiculing myself as much as anyone...but if we must go down this road:

Angst:

I have nothing against sport climbers personally, and I have many friends who don't even own any "rack" beyond a dozen draws. While they are crowded together enduring lines and endless spraying, I'd prefer to be eight pitches up communing with nature and my partner. The bad-blood comes in when sport climbers offend long standing tradition. Bolting an easily top-ropable climb is just such a transgression.

Self Reliance:

Trad climbing breeds it, sport doesn't. We could argue all day about rescues and self-reliance , but it ain't real hard to bail when there's a shiny 5-piece every six feet. I've seen many climbers who claim to be "5.11" climbers who would (and do) lose their shit on an easy route like Snake Dike 5.7(which is bolted, but has maybe eight bolts in 1000ft and full pitch runouts on easy terrain). At one time climbing was about adventure as much as difficulty, there's not a whole lot of adventure when you can clip the next bolt by standing in a sling on the last one. If you want to climb hard stuff "for the beauty of the moves and the sake of climbing at the limit of what is possible" then just boulder or TR.

Obliterating Existing and Potential Lines:

I've seen plenty of areas where squeeze jobs have gone up that were terrible routes, trad lines were retro-bolted (usually renamed and overgraded)and excessive bolting has occured fueled by the "we need more routes here because it's too crowded" argument. Someone could have rap-bolted the hard runout face lines in Eldo a long time ago, but that would make routes like To RP or Not to Be just another line rather than the legend it is. People will bolt a line without giving alot of consideration to the possibility of a bold trad ascent in the future which is a serious disservice to bold trad climbers. Many sport lines (or trad lines) could be top-roped rather than bolted and then sporties have their nice safe route and ballsy folks have their hard route and it is the same route. I've heard the "well just don't clip the bolts then" argument which is F*&^$ weak...you're defacing the rock and telling me to just ignore it if I don't like it? There are good sport routes out there, I'll readily admit...and they are typically roof climbs that you couldn't safely top-rope and have no gear placements.

Grade Inflation:

Many (not all) sport climbers seem to think that genuine hard climbing is a product of the last 15 years. There are boulder problems that were put up in the 60's (read: before sticky rubber)that check in at V8 today. I've been on plenty of 5.10 sport routes (I did my share of sport climbing in the mid 90's, that's one reason I feel I can check in on this issue) that were way, way easier than trad climbs of a similar grade. An example: Tommy Caldwell probably rarely fails to onsight a 5.12 sport route, especially if the sequence is obvious, however that poster of him taking a big whipper at Indian Creek is on Broken Brain, a 5.12 crack..no guess work there, the only holds are the crack.

Environmental Ethics:

You've got to be joking with the "more to worry about than $6 worth of metal in the rock" bit. We can vote Bush out in three more years, those bolts aren't coming out unless you go up with a crowbar. If you went out and started bolting lines at Stanage, or Llanaberis (i.e. Brittain) someone, or more likley a whole mob, would smash your face in. Retrobolting Master's Edge would likely get you killed.

Personally, the term "climber" implies self-reliance, an adventerous spirit, and competence in the wilderness. These aren't characteristics I associate with sport climbers. I boulder with sport climbers all the time and enojoy it thoroughly, they're usually "sick strong" and "fully honed" and I mean that in a good way...FWIW

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Alpine Tom: what is the point of mountaineering/climbing literature then? if no one is interested in a "heartbeat-by-heartbeat account of someone else's climb?" Are famous works like The Savage Arena by Joe Tasker or Simpson's Void really "spray" about "beating one's chest, and impressing other climbers, rather like peacocks flaring their tails and rattling them at each other."

Any of these celebrated climbing accounts use jargon or slang such as "manky" or "sick" or "gnarly" to describe objects and situations.

Every subculture has its own lexicon. All I was trying to show is that climber-jargon has a place in our communication(verbal or written)because it is colorful, informative, and widely understood among climbers.

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I saw this done in a bars bathroom once and I felt like doing it with all the lingo(?)...

DUDE.com, TENSION.com, SICK.com, TAKE.com, ALLEZ.com, COMP.comp, DICEY.com, www.RETROBOLT.com, www.iamaPRO.com, www.iTRADtoclimbrealhard.com (or iTRADsickhard.com)

Hey, special e, if Sean Connery was telling the story you wrote it'd sound dope. Uh oh, there's another one DOPE.com. Alright, well I guess I'm caught so I'll let everyone know. I once heard the word 'Allez' used as a word of encouragement to another 'climber' to 'send' their 'project' in the 'gym'. This 'hinky' word 'irked' me to no end. Worse than even when a friend came home from europe using the words(?) 'wanker', 'piss-off', and 'fag'. Don't ya'll worry cause you're just as likely to hear me say 'shoot', 'dag nabbit', as 'rad' or 'sick'. I do prefer dope to sick though, although dope does sometimes make you cough like you're sick.

wills- - how would you define adventure climbing? would you include the adjective epic in your definition? ok thanks.

s.lo. Eerie

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quote:

Originally posted by Eerie:

wills- - how would you define adventure climbing? would you include the adjective epic in your definition?

Eerie

I wouldn't attempt to define it, it's purely subjective. For all I know you may feel that a sligshot top-rope is adventurous...and that's fine, we share a common interest of seeking out adventure. It's just not adventurous to me (anymore). The first time I went climbing, rapping off a 3ft diameter tree down a low angle slab from 40ft up seemed pretty adventurous...

Another candidate for lamest jargon:

"Jingus" which seems to mean bad, weird, or undesirable although I can't be sure.

I've heard the "Allez" at the crags, but don't have a freakin clue what that one means, someone enlighten me

 

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