Men over X

[JayB]

I once had a two-year stetch of dating only men shorter than me--that's just how it worked out. Big deal. Does that mean I'm not shallow? I doubt it.

 

Out of curiosity, any men here have ever dated a woman taller than they are?

 

Just out of curiousity - how much shorter, and how tall are you? If you check in at 6"4 then that's probably just applied statistics at work.

 

Most of the women engaged in the particular conversation that I mentioned said that being with a man that was significantly shorter than them would make them feel less femine, and would generally result in a creepy "dancing with your little brother" vibe, and that, combined with the fact that most men were as tall or taller than them anyway - put the kibosh on the height inversion.

 

I'm 5'10" - and even at this average height there aren't that many women taller than myself - maybe 10%? I think if all of the other ingredients were in place, and I weren't already married - I'd probably go up to 6'. Any taller than that and the thought of having to deal with a lifetime of lame jokes, etc would probably preclude any interaction that would lead to dating.

[Dru]

if you manage the height thing right you get

"tits in your face everytime you embrace"

[JayB]

 

If women do occasionally date "down" in terms of social status, Townsend said, "that would be out of desperation."

 

By contrast, he says, men are likely to date any physically attractive woman. When it comes to marriage, "guys are not completely insensitive to social class," but, he said, they're "not looking for socioeconomic gain."

 

The underlying assumption in the last statement is that women are looking for socioeconomic gain. What I propose is that this assumption is no longer as predominant as it used to be. The reason for that is obvious: women had not yet won the freedom to work in lucrative fields, and therefore had to depend on a man to be financially secure. This is no longer true. So change the fucking assumption.

 

Actually most women that I've talked to about this have said something to the effect that it's the drive, initiative, intelligence, industriousness, charisma, etc that result in a high socio-economic status that are attractive - not necessarily the money, fame, or whatever. Sort of like the impressive-plumage-as-proxy-for-good-genes dynamic at work in bird mating, etc imo.

[archenemy]

 

If women do occasionally date "down" in terms of social status, Townsend said, "that would be out of desperation."

 

By contrast, he says, men are likely to date any physically attractive woman. When it comes to marriage, "guys are not completely insensitive to social class," but, he said, they're "not looking for socioeconomic gain."

 

The underlying assumption in the last statement is that women are looking for socioeconomic gain. What I propose is that this assumption is no longer as predominant as it used to be. The reason for that is obvious: women had not yet won the freedom to work in lucrative fields, and therefore had to depend on a man to be financially secure. This is no longer true. So change the fucking assumption.

 

Actually most women that I've talked to about this have said something to the effect that it's the drive, initiative, intelligence, industriousness, charisma, etc that result in a high socio-economic status that are attractive - not necessarily the money, fame, or whatever. Sort of like the impressive-plumage-as-proxy-for-good-genes dynamic at work in bird mating, etc imo.

I agree with that--good observation. There is something fundamentally different about people who have ambition. I guess that might be why people don't seem to fall all over themselves for trust funders.

[tanstaafl]

 

Just out of curiousity - how much shorter, and how tall are you?

 

 

I'm 5'9", shortest guy I've dated was 5'6" (though I knew a 5'4" guy a couple of years ago who I would have dated in a second if he had showed any interest). At least one of the guys I dated had to point out that he was an inch shorter than me; I hadn't noticed.

[archenemy]

Girlfriend, you rock.

I've always had a thing for short guys!

[RuMR]

[Squid]

This thread reads like Archie's single ad for a short unemployed guy.

[minx]

This thread reads like Archie's single ad for a short unemployed guy.

 

yeah--she told me she got your PM

[archenemy]

This thread reads like Archie's single ad for a short unemployed guy.

 

yeah--she told me she got your PM

[minx]

i think she wants to know if you're over or under 20 before she replies

[archenemy]

And if you can last over 20 minutes.

[minx]

X=20

[RuMR]

that is irrelevant...she said she's screwing down socially...

[Squid]

Then she's headed my way.

[minx]

that is irrelevant...she said she's screwing down socially...

 

true...but she's screwing up satisfactionally, so it matters

[archenemy]

X=20

XX=20

but

XXX more my style

[Camilo]

I'm 5'9", shortest guy I've dated was 5'6" (though I knew a 5'4" guy a couple of years ago who I would have dated in a second if he had showed any interest). At least one of the guys I dated had to point out that he was an inch shorter than me; I hadn't noticed.

In college there was a girl who apparently really liked me, but wouldn't date me because I was too short - only about an inch shorter than her. Lame, eh? Not that all girls are like that.

[olyclimber]

Are you Tom Cruise?

[JayB]

 

Just out of curiousity - how much shorter, and how tall are you?

 

 

I'm 5'9", shortest guy I've dated was 5'6" (though I knew a 5'4" guy a couple of years ago who I would have dated in a second if he had showed any interest). At least one of the guys I dated had to point out that he was an inch shorter than me; I hadn't noticed.

 

Interesting. My unscientific conclusion is that you are very atypical.

 

I'd also be willing to postulate that if you were to disclose your identity, and that you are at least average looking, you'd never be short of a date again ever in your life.

 

All things being equal, and you can either choose between two completely identical versions of the same guy - one of whom is at least your height, and one is 5'4", you'd just as soon flip a coin as make the choice yourself?

[JayB]

I'm 5'9", shortest guy I've dated was 5'6" (though I knew a 5'4" guy a couple of years ago who I would have dated in a second if he had showed any interest). At least one of the guys I dated had to point out that he was an inch shorter than me; I hadn't noticed.

In college there was a girl who apparently really liked me, but wouldn't date me because I was too short - only about an inch shorter than her. Lame, eh? Not that all girls are like that.

 

Most men I know wouldn't go out with a woman that outweighed them.

[RuMR]

not if it was muscle...

 

fat's a different story...

[Dru]

 

I'd also be willing to postulate that if you were to disclose your identity, and that you are at least average looking, you'd never be short of a date again ever in your life.

 

[JayB]

?

 

Her description of herself just sounded like something out of a "Short Man's Fantasy Personals" compilation.

[marylou]

Say something like - on the average, men are larger and physically stronger than women - and you get a shrill denunciation and the anecdote about the chick down the street who used to be a member of the East German powerlifting team that still cleans 300. Exeption that proves the rule.

 

Where do you come up with this crap? Anyone who does physical labor with the other sex knows this, especially in the realm of upper body strength. Women can do a pretty good job of making up for it by using lower body strength and mechanical advantage (or simply by being young), but it's a natural fact and no one is disputing it. Sure, there will always be exception, but yeah, men are bigger and have more muscle mass in general.