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Posted

Thanks for the fashion advice, DH. I've got some other important questions about dressing for climbing, like about pants.

 

I've got this friend, and he wears capri pants when climbing. He calls them knickers, but you and I know that they're really capri's. Is he gay? Should I avoid bivying with him? He's always reaching into my chalkbag while I'm wearing it- is he just copping a feel of my firm, proud buttocks?

 

I asked him if he was gay, but he says 'No, look at all these hard-men from the late eighties, dressed in skin-tight spandex. Sure, they LOOK gay, but they're as hetero as a glam-rock band. Do you think Judas Priest is gay? Didn't think so.' So he went ahead bought me some spandex that matches his, so we could both become real hard-men.

So my other question is - when I'm wearing my spandex, should I tuck my shirt in or not?

Posted
all these hard-men from the late eighties, dressed in skin-tight spandex.
Do you have a source on some good neon spandex? I think it is exactly what I need to take my climbing to the next level. I'm already using the correct gear sling, so I know that isn't it.
Posted
all these hard-men from the late eighties, dressed in skin-tight spandex.
Do you have a source on some good neon spandex? I think it is exactly what I need to take my climbing to the next level. I'm already using the correct gear sling, so I know that isn't it.
I'd say ask DFA, but he probably isn't old enough to have the Neon kind in his closet.
Posted
all these hard-men from the late eighties, dressed in skin-tight spandex.
Do you have a source on some good neon spandex? I think it is exactly what I need to take my climbing to the next level. I'm already using the correct gear sling, so I know that isn't it.

 

Come with me, Little Oly. We'll dress in suitable hard-man spandex and send the sickness.

 

Later, we'll enthusiastically search each other for ticks.

Posted

oh my! and he was worried this might devolve into a harness v. sling debate. instead it's evolved into a who is the more gay rockstar debate. leather and motorcycles...yeefrickinhaw

Posted

Answer:

Light rack, runner (I prefer a tied runner so you adjust the length and use it for a rap sling).

Heavy rack, sling.

Got a route wired down to nuts and a few cams, just throw it on your harness.

 

Other than that, just throw the crap on and climb.

Posted

I think you and Squid should go to work producing the first Judas Priest signature leather gear sling, that doubles as a g-string banana hamock and comes equipt with a little pocket for a small bottle of "cam lube."

Posted

9/16" webbing tied in a knot. I hate the way the loops on a fancy gear sling get in the way. With a piece of webbing, you just have to reach in one place.

 

Of course, I get my webbing for less than retail, since I'm sponsored by 9/16" Webbing GmbH of Dresden. If anyone wants a bro deal, PM me with your climbing resume and I'll see if I can hook you up.

 

PS - I left some of my pro-deal webbing on pretty much every hard route in the Cascades. PM me if you find it. TIA.

Posted
I always wondered what a "Turbo Lover" was.....

 

a "turbo express" is an express screw with a fold out knob

therefore, a turbo lover is... hahaha.giffruit.gifsmileysex5.gif

Posted

I've strategically cut out the butt of my neon spandex capris, don a very tight wife-beater--trimmed off mid-tummy and holla-hoop my gear sling around my sweatband-laden, mullet-sportin' head while I'm waiting for the short bus too arrive. Who's with me!?!? hahaha.gifyelrotflmao.gif

Posted

I've got this friend, and he wears capri pants when climbing. He calls them knickers, but you and I know that they're really capri's. Is he gay? Should I avoid bivying with him? He's always reaching into my chalkbag while I'm wearing it- is he just copping a feel of my firm, proud buttocks?

 

I asked him if he was gay, but he says 'No, look at all these hard-men from the late eighties, dressed in skin-tight spandex. Sure, they LOOK gay, but they're as hetero as a glam-rock band. Do you think Judas Priest is gay? Didn't think so.' So he went ahead bought me some spandex that matches his, so we could both become real hard-men.

So my other question is - when I'm wearing my spandex, should I tuck my shirt in or not?

 

Well, you are wise to ask such pointed and pertinant questions.

 

In answer to your question Squid, you can definativly answer that question affirmatively if his cock tastes like sh*t. laugh.gifHCL.gif

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