sketchfest Posted October 7, 2002 Posted October 7, 2002 Good morning all you nubbin grabbers. Where is the Smith weekend pube club TR? Did anyone come back alive? Quote
Cpt.Caveman Posted October 7, 2002 Posted October 7, 2002 It was all about the Squampton Party Peelers at the Oceanside for free. Splitter granite and no rain Snoboy drinkin gin and Dru drinkin stout [ 10-07-2002, 08:56 AM: Message edited by: Cpt.Caveman ] Quote
Cletus Posted October 7, 2002 Posted October 7, 2002 Weeeel, I dunno about the rest of the crew's adventures on Sunday, but Gapertimmay, b-rock, and I popped up on top of Mt. Chossington..er..Washington, and had a grand ole time hanging out with the party of 10 that was clusterfucking the Hilary Step - I mean, first pitch of the North Ridge. Actually, there was some pretty funny stuff that came out of that, but I'll let Timmay write that up... And Sat at the tuff was bitchin, yar. Met a couple more cool cc'ers, had a good time chillin' in the sun. Quote
iain Posted October 7, 2002 Posted October 7, 2002 Sorry I couldn't make it. I was talked into a few days at Tieton. If you have not been there it is eggselent. Quote
sk Posted October 7, 2002 Posted October 7, 2002 Alive...tierd...sore... had much fun, climbed many things with many people.. got silly at the campfire...that's all I can say the rest is classiified and I will have to check your clearence Quote
texplorer Posted October 7, 2002 Posted October 7, 2002 Well, another outstanding show of wankism this weekend at sporto land. Raw tips, crowds, cc.com groupies- yes we had it all. Still a tad bit warm but some were baked all day. Quote
Cletus Posted October 7, 2002 Posted October 7, 2002 quote: Originally posted by Muffy The Wanker Sprayer: Alive...tierd...sore... had much fun, climbed many things with many people.. got silly at the campfire...that's all I can say the rest is classiified and I will have to check your clearence So, I take it jk turned up eventually? Quote
sk Posted October 7, 2002 Posted October 7, 2002 Yes... as the sun started to set, not long after the BEND CREW took off, mustang sally and I went for a walk, I was starting to worry a bit but was convinced that JK EWIK and SHRED were climbing SOMETHING>>>> yet could not THINK of where TEX could be... I was dubled over in hunger, parched from thirst freezing cold and you know all over Smith suffering no, realy, they all showed up about half an hour after you all left and we went to camp BTW in case anyone cares... I had always heard that the hike to Kowala Rock was realy hard and wasn't realy worth it BLAH BLAH BLAH... I loved it. We had so much fun. there were good climbs of all levels there. I inteand to go back and climb some more stuff there. Quote
jkrueger Posted October 7, 2002 Posted October 7, 2002 Yeah, that's what we were doing... [ 10-07-2002, 10:51 AM: Message edited by: jkrueger ] Quote
jkrueger Posted October 7, 2002 Posted October 7, 2002 Tex was seen Saturday morning in the parking lot, and then disappeared and was not seen again until after dark... Though he claims to have been hangdogging his latest project (Bunny Face Direct with Sit Start Variation), it is believed that he was actually abducted by a large posse of sporto betty groupies. Despite his best efforts to beat them off with horsecock (it is one of the 10 essentials for a reason, after all), he was unable to overcome their sheer numbers, and was taken against his will to a secret sporto cave in the remote outbacks of the park. The horrors and atrocities that occured in said cave are still a mystery, though it must have been truly gruesome - his dazed and confused mental state suggested severe emotional trauma, while his bloody and mangled body and shredded lycra were obviously the result of intense physical suffering. The fate of his coveted trad rack is at this time still unknown - he returned with only 12 quickdraws, a Grigri, and a daisy chain... Efforts at reprogramming Tex were unsuccessful throughout Sunday, though his heel hooks were in fine form. Quote
Heinouscling Posted October 7, 2002 Posted October 7, 2002 Lets see, Saturday I tried a couple of new routes to the right of Phoenix. Got on a route called "Harvester Of Sorrow". It turned out to be a most excellent route. Its starting to get more chalk. Tried the route that clears the bulge to the left of Harvester. That thing is rated 11c but my friend, who climbs solid 12 had trouble with the crux. Finally ticked that route on the far left side of Phoenix buttress that goes up the arete. Got on Take A Powder. Most fun but found the crux to be pissin hard. All in all, another superb weekend of Smith climbing. -Heinous Quote
sk Posted October 7, 2002 Posted October 7, 2002 Did you see who nabbed Tex??? I was realy worried about that kid, man. I'm not sure if he will ever be the same didn't climb but one sporty this trip ( but then I don't realy climb, I mostly just piss and mone and bitch about all of my owies and how hungry and cold I am ),need to head back and work on my sport leads Quote
Heinouscling Posted October 7, 2002 Posted October 7, 2002 Hey, speaking of sporto betties, who was the blonde gal, on Heinouscling, wearing the skin tight, little tiny shorts? Damn, was she ever nice eye candy !!!! -Heinous Quote
sk Posted October 7, 2002 Posted October 7, 2002 ask TEX I think she was one of the suspects in his nabbing Quote
sk Posted October 7, 2002 Posted October 7, 2002 quote: Originally posted by Greg W: quote:Originally posted by Muffy The Wanker Sprayer: ...the hike to Kowala Rock...I loved it. Muffy LIKED hiking?????? The hike was not bad compared to the hike to givlers dome ...the rock was totaly fun Quote
Heinouscling Posted October 7, 2002 Posted October 7, 2002 quote: Originally posted by daisy: quote:Originally posted by Heinouscling: Hey, speaking of sporto betties, who was the blonde gal, on Heinouscling, wearing the skin tight, little tiny shorts? Damn, was she ever nice eye candy !!!! -Heinous that was me. 3 showers later i can still feel the slimy tracks your eyes left roving over me. Ahh fuck. Not you again. Well, I'm sure, 3 days later, I'll be able to see the slimy tracks you left on Heinouscling! Beeeoch!!! -Heinous Quote
gapertimmy Posted October 8, 2002 Posted October 8, 2002 Hi, my name is gaper. And, by the way, 8 does equal D. So the story goes, at the last moment Saturday morning before crusin up to smiffy tuff wit homey cletus, and main woman beckiest, i made a last minute alteration to my helmet. Inspired entirely by discussion from this fine board, I peeled off a slice of athletic tape and plastered it across the front of my pretty electric blue (whatever happened to that fine tv show?). I then took a sharpie and wrote the follwing information about myself: GAPER and in the lower right hand corner a small, but noticeable 8=D I was fully convinced that by admiting to the world my gaperness, that I would be able to crank harder. Indeed I did crank hard that day *COUGH* 5.4 on site*, but the true irony of my new helmet art would occur on sunday while perched on the North notch of mount chossington. ACT ONE: GAPERS AT THE NOTCH As we approached the north ridge of fine mount chossington, cletus, b-rock, and meself were stoaked at the nice day, and looking forward to the *fine* central oregon granite that lie ahead of us. Then all of a sudden, much to our dismay, we spotted a cluster (FAHQ) of climbers perched high on the ridge above us.... trekking poles glistened in the morning light, and sparkles shimmered off the biners which hung so proudly on their harnesses.... indeed, our fears had come true, that sign we saw that AM at the campground was fully realized: MAZAMA'S GROUP SITE #7. Sooo, we reached the notch where we were greeted by our new friends, the witty climbing conversation soon began: cletus "morning folks!" mazamas*6 "HELLO!!" b-rock "you guys with the mazamas?" mazama #1 "why yes, how could you tell?" no sarcasm at all b-rock "the name tags on the helmets..." ****laughter erupts from the audience****** mazama#2 "Don't you guys have helmets" cletus "Of course!" and gapertimmy places his new helmet proudly on his head.... his silent protest... his vindication.... ohhh the plabness of it all INTERMISSION: we have a plab ass climb, great weather, a little bit of a scare and we rejoin our alpine heroes on a rapell/belay ledge half way up to route.... ACT TWO: TAKES ONE TO KNOW ONE cletus and b-rock exit stage right, leaving young gapertimmy clad in helmet behind on the ledge with 8 mazamas. Mazama Chief "So great day for a climb" gapertimmy "fucking plab if you ask me" Mazama Chief "plab?" gapertimmy "PLLLLLLLLAAAAABBB, freshiez." Mazama Chief "so why do you have GAPER written on your helmet?" gapertimmy "ohhh, my buddies down there think i'm a shitty climber, so they put that on there, kind of a joke ya know?" Mazama Chief "Ohh, I get it, you gape up at hard routes with your mouth wide open!" gapertimmy "YEP, YOU GOT IT BUDDY! You know JUST what i'm talkin bout" gaertimmy raps off into the sunset, proud to have spread the gapeword, and let the plab flow across the alpine land. THE END. In all honesty though, the mazama's (though there were TOO many of them for this route) we're fine folks, very courteous, and we're kind enough to let us climb through. to them, and WERD to my padnahs this past weekend. keepin it real on some fine choss! Quote
iain Posted October 8, 2002 Posted October 8, 2002 Just be sure that once down at that notch to run like hell down the scree slopes if the group still lurks above. I'd swear those dudes trundle on purpose. You're not safe until you are around the bend. PS another way to snag some mazama sightings are long underwear underneath shorts. Unfortunately many climbing species already sport this plumage, making a definitive diagnosis difficult to all but the trained expert. Usually the herding behavior and copious drone about the latest BD gear gives it away though. They are usually nice, but so's the lady in the suv who almost flattens you on the way to kids soccer practice. Quote
texplorer Posted October 8, 2002 Posted October 8, 2002 All of a sudden a flurry of lcyra and antipersperant chalk flew in my face and I was taken down. Not since the snaffles back at the farm rioted on me had I been subject to such raw brutality. The events of the next couple of hours are blurry. I seem to remember clinging to micro edges, climbing faces with not a trace of a crack, and connecting into the rock by these silvery bent washer-looking thingies. Just as the sun was setting I managed to crawl back up the trail back to the Outback parking lot. I attribute my being alive to my trusty Carharts and a bit of sheer luck. Later in the evening my spirits returned and I was even visited by some crack fairies from yosemite by the light of the campfire. My spirits were up but my body was still week. Luckily I dug through my pack and discovered the delicacy of the gods-Yes, I had brought horsecock (or DD to you old schoolers). With each bite I felt stonger and stonger. I knew the next day I would be back on the cracks of the lower gorge. At first the jams hard but by the end of the day that familiar Marley tune was in my head and I was sending. It was a momentous day. Other CC.comers were there to support me. There was quite a show of the north people. Though I have had few experiences with these hard and mysterious people I think through careful negotiations we will have many partnerships. They lived up to their noble image and the peace pipe was passed many times that day. My southern folk also displayed fine character. yes, it was a good weekend despite my abduction by the sporto horde. We had a bast and all you gapers who missed it . . well so what if granite is better. Adieu Quote
Cletus Posted October 8, 2002 Posted October 8, 2002 Well done, timmay, GREAT TR! But what about the dood who gave us the EXTENSIVE beta and pep talk on the 5.3 finish to Round River? Him: "Blah Blah Blah, not much there at all to place pro in, just a bush, and don't go to far over, the rock gets really sandy blah blah blah and watch out for cougars and snaffles and blah blah blah, don't step on the Donkey Dick hold, it's loose, blah blah blah" Us: "Gee, thanks old guy, and by the way, next time you rap down on top of people's heads instead of walking off the back and you are rapping a multi-pitch route to an anchor 150 feet of the deck, how about you tie the ends of your rope?" Him: "..." Us: "mmmmhmmmm. Yeah, so I'm gonna need you to come in on Saturday. Yeeeeeaaaaaah. THat'd be great. Buh-bye now." Him: "boy, he sure is climbing fast..." All true. I swear it. Quote
daisy Posted October 8, 2002 Posted October 8, 2002 quote: Originally posted by Heinouscling: Hey, speaking of sporto betties, who was the blonde gal, on Heinouscling, wearing the skin tight, little tiny shorts? Damn, was she ever nice eye candy !!!! -Heinous that was me. 3 showers later i can still feel the slimy tracks your eyes left roving over me. Quote
Greg_W Posted October 8, 2002 Posted October 8, 2002 quote: Originally posted by Muffy The Wanker Sprayer: ...the hike to Kowala Rock...I loved it. Muffy LIKED hiking?????? Quote
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