Bob_Clarke

quote: Originally posted by iain: waded through the rabble at smith on fri/sat but managed to stake out some climbs. Anyone know what that long bolted line to the left of the peanut is? It has about 3 little roofs w/ boulder start (or chimney to right). felt about .10 something. What is it? Can't find it in the book or addendum. then it was mt washington on sunday. 5.10a

HOW TO TAKE A POOP AT WORK We've all been there but don't like to admit it. We've all kicked back in our cubicles and suddenly felt something brew down below. As much as we try to convince ourselves otherwise, the WORK POOP is inevitable. For those who hate pooping at work, following is the 2001 Survival Guide for taking a dump at work. Memorize these definitions and pooping at work will become a pure pleasure. ESCAPEE. Definition: a fart that slips out while taking a leak at the urinal or forcing poop in a stall. This is usually accompanied by a sudden wave of panic embarrassment. This is similar to the hot flash you receive when passing an unseen police car and speeding. If you release an escapee, do not acknowledge it. Pretend it did not happen. If you are standing next to the farter in the urinal, pretend you did not hear it. No one likes an escapee, it is uncomfortable for all involved. Making a joke or laughing makes both parties feel uneasy. JAILBREAK (Used in conjunction with ESCAPEE).Definition: When forcing poop, several farts slip out at a machine gun pace. This is usually a side effect of diarrhea or a hangover. If this should happen, do not panic. Remain in the stall until everyone has left the bathroom so to spare everyone the awkwardness of what just occurred. COURTESY FLUSH. Definition: The act of flushing the toilet the instant the nose cone of the poop log hits the water and the poop is whiskedaway to an undisclosed location. This reduces the amount of air time the poop has to stink up the bathroom. This can help you avoid being caught doing the WALK OF SHAME. WALK OF SHAME. Definition: Walking from the stall, to the sink, to the door after you have just stunk up the bathroom. As with all facts this can be a very uncomfortable moment if someone walks in and busts you. It is best to pretend that the smell does not exist. Can be avoided with the use of the COURTESY FLUSH. OUT OF THE CLOSET POOPER. Definition: A colleague who poops at work and damn proud of it. You will often see an Out Of The Closet Pooper enter the bathroom with a newspaper or magazine under their arm. Always look around the office for the Out Of The Closet Pooper before entering the bathroom. THE POOPING FRIENDS NETWORK (PFN). Definition: A group of coworkers who band together to ensure emergency pooping goes off without incident. This group can help you to monitor the whereabouts of Out Of The Closet Poopers, and identify SAFE HAVENS. SAFE HAVENS. Definition: A seldom used bathroom somewhere in the building where you can least expect visitors. Try floors that are predominantly of the opposite sex. This will reduce the odds of a pooper of your sex entering the bathroom. TURD BURGLAR: Definition: A pooper who does not realize that you are in the stall and tries to force the door open. This is one of the most shocking and vulnerable moments that can occur when taking a dump at work. If this occurs, remain in the stall until the Turd Burglar leaves. This way you will avoid all uncomfortable eye contact. CAMO-COUGH. Definition: A phony cough that alerts all new entrants into the bathroom that you are in a stall. This can be used to cover-up a WATERMELON, or to alert potential Turd Burglars. Very effective when used in conjunction with an ASTAIRE ASTAIRE. Definition: A subtle toe-tap that is used to alert potential Turd Burglars that you are occupying a stall. This will remove all doubt that the stall is occupied. If you hear an Astaire, leave the bathroom immediately so the pooper can poop in peace. WATERMELON. Definition: A turd that creates a loud splash when hitting the toilet water. This is also an embarrassing incident. If you feel a watermelon coming on, create a diversion. See CAMO-COUGH. HAVANA OMELET. Definition: A load of diarrhea that creates a series of loud splashes in the toilet water. Often accompanied by an Escapee. Try using a Camo-Cough with an Astaire. UNCLE TED. Definition: A bathroom user who seems to linger around forever. Could spend extended lengths of time in front of the mirror or sitting on the pot. An Uncle Ted makes it difficult to relax while on the crapper, as you should always wait to drop your load when the bathroom is empty. This benefits you as well as the other bathroom attendees. FLY BY. Definition: The act of scouting out a bathroom before pooping. Walk in and check for other poopers. If there are others in the bathroom, leave and come back again. Be careful not to become a FREQUENT FLYER. People may become suspicious if they catch you constantly going into the bathroom.

quote: Originally posted by Muffy The Wanker Sprayer: As a member of the recently employed is it wrong of me to look forword to vacations already??? This means you can waste time on cc.com AND get paid.

This weekend - then off to Vegas. Got a partner for The Original Route & Levitation 29! Schwing

Hey RuMr Have you tried Power in your eyes? That is sick hard. Sound like I missed a fun weekend. Did you work "French Connection"? I'll be working it next weekend before my trip to Vegas.

quote: Originally posted by sk: Yeppers... although we may need to ummmmm make a sing up sheet for all the willing ropeguns [/QB] I'll sign up for this weekend - will thelawgoddess be joining us? Does this mean I get a belay slave for my project?

I loved my experience - Polish Route via the Vacas Valley. We flew into Santiago Chile (it was cheeper I think) and took a bus to Punta Del Inca where we hired the main guy there, shit his name jsut escaped me. Anyway he's RELIABLE. Main point here RELIABLE. A group of Californians dissed him and went further downte road for cheeper mules and got screwed. The mules didn't show up for days. After the climb we decended the Plaza de Mules (see previous posts) and where surrounded by folks wanting to purchase our gear. I mean everything, I sold my expedition weight teal green underware that I'd been wearing for $100 American dollars. Needless to say we got the hell out of there quick because to many creepy looking people were checking out everything tha wasn't nailed down. So then it was off to the Chilean coast and Vina Del Mar. You MUST GO THERE. GO AND SEE THE BEACH, any red blooded man MUST GO THERE. Basically we took MRE's and bought fresh salad shit and fresh foods as well (thank god for Mules) and had an awesome time. Have fun.

sk your Ropegun will be in the North Cascades. Smith the following week.

Good topic spray boi When I began climbing the rage was getting a badge of peak bagging honor. The more peaks the more "experienced" and revered. I generally get about 20 peaks a year not counting those Tiger mountain & Mt. Si runs. Is peak bagging important. Sure, every peak has a distinct view and personality kind of like a buffet table. Enjoy all of them!

quote: Originally posted by sk: [/qb] DREAMER! I might let you be my ropegun though [/QB] Anytime - any route (she totally wants me)

quote: Originally posted by sk: quote:Originally posted by Ropegun2002: We all wish sk would get our "point" HOW RUDE Thanks! (She wants me)

It's a great peak! Go do it. And for those of you who like a little exciting winter ice/snow route Pugh make for an awesome outing.

We all wish sk would get our "point"

Disclaimers - what the hell? Why is it so bad to answer a question with your honest feelings? Most of all I hesitate from saying what I truely think because of the tidal wave of spray that comes about on this site. TG - if you truely feel that way then I for one respect your viewpoint. I have some wacky training methods that folks have laughed and riduculed for years. Bottom line is that I've climbed at a very high level (in all disciplines) for a very long time. That doesn't make me a wiser/better man than anyone, it just demonstrates that those particular things work for me. I've been traveling solo this year more than ever. There are many reasons why, but I couldn't have done this as safely years ago. Bur I now have the confidence, background, and experience (see definition) to go out alone. I vote your response wasn't irresponsible.

quote: Originally posted by Heinouscling: quote:Originally posted by Dr Flash Amazing: Ah, yes. The Doctor almost blew the flash at the long jug move, too. Lost the ability to claim onsight after watching the video of the route on smithrock.com and seeing Lawson huck for the jug. DFA remembered that tidbit as he was getting ready to give up, and decided to try the hucker, which paid off with the sharp bucket. It's definitely in your face right there. Shabby footholds for a couple moves, too; the Doctor was skating all over the place. You ought to take a spin on Purple Aces over at Shipwreck. Similar climbing, vert to off-vert, with a bit of physical stuff at the bottom and then an unnervingly blank and tenuous finish. Super fun; that route doesn't see enough traffic. Yes, the first time I tried it, during the onsight, I hucked for the bucket also. After I broke skin on the crimp and squirted blood all over the rock, I opted for a different strategy. I clotted the split tip with chalk (ah yes, that chalk is good for something after all), and then was able to make the move statically, although, without howling in pain. Tis a great route. Yes indeed. Funny you mention Shipwreck wall. Thats definitely where I shall be part of the time next weekend. Tis a fine selection of routes on that wall. -Heinous Good work Heinous - Those routes left of Blackened are OK, they have hard cruxes, however there better choices for the grade. Try Rawhide, Zebra Seam.

http://www.maximonline.com/index.html web page This is bookmarked on my desktop. [ 09-17-2002, 03:09 PM: Message edited by: Ropegun2002 ]

quote: Originally posted by E-rock: Readers of Maxim Magazine and drivers of shiney new SUV's need not apply. You must be gay.

Just left of the buttress to beginThe Nose route there are a number of popular and awesome sport and gear climbs from 5.9 - 10c.

Smith Rock Weekend Seen - Beth Rodden scoping Rude Boys (looking quite hot I may add) Heard - "How'd that rope get up there?" Some wanker asking my wife about our rope hanging from Darkness at Noon. Said - "I only place gear" Same wanker looking for trad only lines in the Dihedral area at Smith Rock.

quote: Originally posted by Retrosaurus: [/qb] You really don't want iron. They get really cold on bivys and no one will spoon with you.[/QB] what's that hard cold thing pressing against my back???????????

Do they come in iron - for the long runouts? [ 09-13-2002, 10:03 AM: Message edited by: Ropegun2002 ]

Where do send said pictures? More can be taken at the sport climbing mecca this weekend.

I'm still waiting for the Jules, sk, thelawgoddess, icegirl, allison, calendar. Of course the obligatory group picture with me in the middle!

I'm still waiting for the Jules, sk, thelawgoddess, icegirl, allison, calendar. Of course the obligatory group picture with me in the middle!

I'm still waiting for the Jules, sk, thelawgoddess, icegirl, allison, calendar. Of course the obligatory group picture with me in the middle!