assmonkey

Read this.

Assmonkey almost always sets the pink and/or red when they are on the rack (which is often). They work really well at Leavenworth and Lil' Si, and protect horizontal cracks like nobody's business. Good to know about the REI recall, too. So, WHAT IS UP WITH THIS?!?!?: That just sounds like a lawsuit waiting to happen! I can't believe Metolius is distributing to Wal-Mart....

You guys rock, thanks for the information. It does help. One more question for you: I can clip doubles together into a single piece of pro, like an ice screw, correct? I understand that twins MUST be clipped together, but I can do something like this with doubles, right? Clip 1: center blue, orange Clip 2: left blue Clip 3: right orange Clip 4: center blue, orange If I fell on the 1st or 4th piece, the ropes will hold a fall correct? And on the 2nd and 3rd as well? To date, all my climbing experience has been on a single rope. And yes, I am actively seeking proper mentoring.

Ok, fine. I just put this on.

No way dude, I'm listening to the DRI album that is the pinnacle of the hardcore/metal movement, and from 1985 no less! Just wanted to share the love.

You think you look good in your new uniform Starched and pressed into the perfect norm Until uncle Sam puts a gun in your hand Points you in the wrong direction and says, "kill that man!" Well, I don't fit into your plan You can't make me kill, man You can't make me kill a man You can't make me kill and I won't fight your stupid war Believe me, I'm not your slave I won't fight in your war games The C.I.A. Can't make me play The world's running into problems now That doesn't mean we have to fight it out Well, I don't fit into your plan You can't make me kill, man You can't make me kill a man You can't make me kill and I won't fight your stupid war I won't fight your stupid war I won't fight when there's nothing to fight for Nothing to fight for Nothing to fight fuckin for

Reaganomics killing me Reaganomics killing me Reaganomics killing me Reaganomics killing you!

Home from school and here to stay I'll take it easy again today Ain't gonna work, don't need no pay Couch Slouch Fuck Off My mom don't like the way I live She says I take but I don't give My dad can't stand the way I am He says, "Damn it, just get up man" Couch Slouch You Suck Awaken now and then to eat and shit Don't go outside 'cause I don't fit Society's not ready for me Crazy assholes never will be

Fuggit, assmonkey is buying himself an early Christmas present. I'm going to get double ropes for the express purpose of climbing ice. So, being a total ice newbie, can some of you hotshots help with purchasing advice? I think I want 60m doubles, but all the offerings make my head spin (8.1, 8.6, etc.). Help assmonkey. On that note, anyone want to take this ice newbie ice climbing this winter?

John Gill was inspired by Castenada's later writings. "Tales of Power" in particular. Jardine is one hell of a interesting dude. Never met him, but I've always admired the approach he takes in all his endeavers: Climbing, sailing, and hiking. He pushes boundaries.

Read this book: Book. The book is basically a compilation of powerful mental strengthening ideas and techniques, like relaxation and visualization and overcoming self-imposed mental limits, confidence issues, etc. Some folks might poo-poo this kind of stuff as being too touchy-feely, but personally, I'm open to it. I'm not a hippy myself, but hippies taught me to climb, and they were always talking about this kind of stuff: Carlos Castenada, martial arts, Eastern thinking mojo, etc. They always played really shitty music on the way to the crags, too. But I don't do that.

assmonkey likes women.

assmonkey's johnson stirred watching the opening scene. Watching the last scene, I heard Beavis and Butt-head yelling, "JUMP, ASSMUNCH, JUMP, DO IT!, DO IT!" Babelfish says: That band sucks. Is this the music the kids listen to these days?

Assmonkey is Left-Liberal. Left-Liberals prefer self-government in personal matters and central decision-making on economics. They want government to serve the disadvantaged in the name of fairness. Leftists tolerate social diversity, but work for economic equality, and in general are on average 52% more intelligent than all people of other political persuasions, and fully 98% more intelligent than people who voted for W.

First, let's say this: assmonkey isn't a doctor. This is not advice. After I work out at the gym (a real gym, not a climbing gym), I take a cold rinse in the shower, and soak for a few minutes in the tub. I stay in the tub only to raise my core temp a bit, no more than 8 minutes. Then, I hop out and rinse in the coldest shower I can get out of the wall. Sometimes if I am feeling especially perky, I repeat. The effect, as I understand it, is that the skin tempature is quickly lowered, thus stimulating blood flow. This is a good thing, as it "washes" away all the by-products left over in your muscles from your workout. The net effect is that you recover sooner, thus you can workout again sooner, and get stronger faster. If I remember correctly, Twight mentions a process like this briefly in his book, and people have been doing hot-tub-to-snow-plunge like things since the beginning of time. As far as when you shouldn't get into a tub, I dunno. If you think you are going to pass out form your workout, it's probably not a good idea (and your workout is probably ineffective, too). If you have a weak heart, it's probably not a good idea. On a more personal note, I think that long sessions in the tub should be augmented with Bud Light and bikini briefs. The bikini briefs really help to show off assmonkey's johnson.

I read an article in one of those climbing porn mags about climbing in Pakistan. The author wrote that the customs agents told the climbers to claim Canadian residency instead of American residency while traveling abroad in the near East and Persian Gulf to avoid any anti-American sentiment. Thanks W, for making the world a safer place for Americans!

Anyone used these? They look heavy and hard to place. I would think the second nut would interfere with placements. http://www.camp.it/ukprodotto.asp?MF=02&F=08&C=1033.01

This is fucking killer:

I'm not trolling, just curious: What exactly was this review process? Asking Leland if he was going to bolt the wall? Or is there actually something like a steering commitee that reviews new route development at 38? I can just imagine a group of mounties filling out a bolt request in triplicate that they submit to themselves for approval. Form 12B-2, "Ten Essentials for Bolting."

"'Search And Destroy' -- The name came from a column heading in a Time magazine article about the Vietnamese war. I was sitting reading it, snorting big Chinese rocks of heroin under one of these grand English oak trees in Kensington Garden outside the Kensington Palace on a summer day in civilized Merrie Olde. I used to go out there to sit and write, wearing my leather cheetah jacket, leather pants, wraparound shades, and sit under this oak tree on a nice day and try to write songs. Once I had the title I knew what to do with it. It's mostly one vocal take, right at the top of my range. Williamson had the riff in that R.G. Jones 8-track and he started playing it and laughing, 'Kill it gooks!' I said, 'Geez, that's disgusting!' It has nothing to do with gooks! (laughter) The Stooges are all really horrible people, they're all really politically incorrect, much more than I was, much more, these guys were really like your basic American Archie Bunker juniors, all of 'em, real spuds. " -Iggy Pop From the liner notes.

Cream corn from the socket of Davis.

When I saw this headline, I thought they were referring to his time in office: Former President Reagan Rarely Awake

ca. 1996 “The Domino,” Mulkey Gulch, MT- At the time, I had just started lead climbing, and I had the misconception that you weren’t really a climber until you could lead a 5.10. This is just a short 4-bolt affair, but I worked the piss out of the route over four full climbing days. I can still clearly remember the opening crimper shelf and how the jugs at top would not feel like jugs under the solid pump that would develop as I inched my way past the bolts. When I finally topped out, my girlfriend at the time gave me a bunch of shit because I had left the draws in place for the complete ascent (as opposed to re-racking them and clipping the bolts again on the ascent). I was so stoked from actually linking the moves, that her critique didn’t bother me. Plus, I had seen the hardmen at Smith redpoint burly routes with draws in place, so if it was good enough for them, it was good enough for me. For me, the route was totally mental. At the time I didn’t think I could actually climb 5.10. I would let go at the slightest hint of a pump, or the second that I realized that I had blown the sequence. What I learned was that I shouldn’t buy into failure before I even tied in. Plus, knowing I could actually get up a 5.10 opened up a whole new world of routes for me. ca. 1998 “Tips City (I think?),” Broughton Bluff, OR- At the time, I had been climbing on my own gear for over a year, but I had never fallen on any gear that I had placed myself. A friend of mine told me that in order to break into the world of 5.10 crack climbing, you have to be willing to fall on your gear (and it’s been my experience that he was right-on about that). At the time, this route was just at my climbing limit. When I got below the crux, I hung on for a long time. I reset my gear about ten times, talking myself through it. I went for it with half a heart, sketched my feet, greased off the crux, and plummeted onto a red Metolius TCU, (which I still climb on today). It held, and I was stoked. I lowered, climbed back up, (yeah, I yo-yo’d it), and hiked the crux with confidence that my gear would hold. Climbing on gear is still a crux for me sometimes. If I have periods where I’m climbing over gear a lot, I get more confident. The first fall of the season is always the scariest, right? And when gear pulls, as it does every so often, I get all sketched again.