Dr_Flash_Amazing

Since when do you give a shit about killing or violence? Please. Is this one of your funnies again?

And perfectly valid, but let's ignore that in favor of obfuscatory finger-pointing!

Pay attention, toolbag; DFA didn't mention any conspiracy, but let's think about the issue. The military has been thoroughly busted on the prisoner abuse front, and it's abundantly clear that we're willing to torture. Who has something to lose, here? The military. You like to hate on Clinton, so let's use him as an example; you'll like it. Remember when he got busted for swabbing Monica's tonsils? And, within a couple of days, he decides we need to blow up a suspected chemical plant in Iraq? That's what we call distraction, Fairweather, and it's a tactic used by those in power who find themselves in potentially deep shit to keep people like you from thinking about what the powerful may have done wrong. You had your eyes pried open real good about Enron; what's it gonna take to pry them the rest of the way open? Tell you what, the world looks like shit with your eyes open, but at least it looks real.

Fucking A, Fairweather...their sources were in the American military, and they knew what the story was. If they're not going to deny the shit, then who's anti-American and anti-military? Assuming that this did not actually happen, then perhaps the military should have been a little more forthright in not letting the press get the idea it did in the first place? Pretty convenient; leak a story to a major media outlet, deny the story is true after it's published, smear the "liberal" media, conveniently calling into question all information from the press, while simultaneously implying that the government/military is the correct source of information. Nice.

That's effing brilliant! She must be a fantastic child. Regarding the climbing, so far, the Doctor's, er, "patient" has been cleared for toproping. Climbing whilst knocked up is actually pretty common, too; witness Lynn Hill, Alison Osius (who penned a short article for one of the climbing mags which included the gem that she felt like Godzilla trying to climb ), and most recently, the obscenely fit Tiffany Campbell, who climbed up until two weeks before her due date (!).

"An egocentric spraylord and his stopwatch-toting pooch race to the top of Mt. Rainier armed with nothing but short-shorts and a pocketful of Gu, in a desperate bid to save a lost sheep and salvage the remaining tatters of his tarnished reputation! Will Lightnin' Dan and his canine comrade make it in time? And will anyone on the internet believe it if he does? Find out in this Summer's most pants-pissingly, schoolgirl-squealingly anticipated action-adventure super-epic: Rainier Redemption!"

Does REI carry that model? And, more importantly, how many colors does it come in?

Well, someone certainly is.

Dano would go.

OK, so here's a question for all you mothers: If you climbed while you were pregnant, what did you do harness-wise? Just get a bigger harness? Bigger harness & a chest harness? Full-body harness? Quit climbing and take up chess? The future is at stake, so any useful information (useful information, wiseguys) would be greatly appreciated. Sincerely, Dr. Flash Amazing

It's true the Gri-Gri is pricey, but given the life-span of the thing, it's pretty fairly priced. DFA used to go through ATCs every few years, but the Doctor's 7-ish-year-old Gri-Gri is still going. Given the increasing prevalence and proven reliability of these little gems, it seems like a worthwhile purchase. Hey, REI's got 20% off one item for members right now; so score one on the cheap!

Sticker illicitly, score trail head?

You are right to celebrate Dr. Flash Amazing's past escritorial exploits, yet foolishly premature in lamenting the decline, descent, or demise of same. Contrary to what some may imagine, DFA has more responsibilities than simply filling every thread on this bulletin board with unfiltered brilliance, so sometimes, the Doctor turns over the keyboard to the slightly-less-capable interns at the AmazingCo, Inc. Bureau of Filler and Flimflam. Fear not, however, for the Doctor is always lurking in the shadows, pulling strings and stacking the deck in favor of clever repartee. In the meantime, perhaps the following heartwarming dedication of a momentous event will sate your desire for quality Doctorial bbs-ing. If not, well, to quote one of cc.com's most celebrated contrarian alumni, EAT BALLZ, ASSEYES!

What is this "trail head"? Some kind of backcountry sex act? Sport climbers don't hike, holmes.

Come on, don't be so naive...that's what the cover of night was invented for!

Live by the sword; die by the sword. OK, if some renegade wants to slap a bumpersticker on the DFA'baru's rear window, the Doctor will just have to suffer the consequences.

If, in this case, "SUV" was a description of the act, perhaps it would stand for: Somebody's Useless Vengeance Come on, don't be such a square. All vengeance is useful! "Getting even is not the best revenge. It is the only revenge!" - GW Hayduke

The chalked holds argument cuts both ways, however. Most routes contain more holds than those that actually get you correctly through the sequences, and pretty much every route has got the promising sucker holds thoroughly chalked, sometimes with an entire sucker sequence leading to a dead-end (anyone ever wind up in that real chalky, real promising-looking jug/hole to the right of the underclings on Blue Light Special? Oops.), which often makes up for any benefit gained by being able to see where the holds are. Also, most anyone onsighting at their limit will attest to the fact finding the holds is often not the problem; rather, figuring out the correct sequence in which to use them is. This is especially true on routes that traverse, or make several small moves over a relatively short space, which, on jingus little jizzler grips, will invariably punish you by making it damn near impossible to reverse the sequence you botched. The other factor to consider is that it's essentially a level playing field. i.e. most climbers attempting a route are going to encounter it in similar condition (at least for most routes at well-traveled climbing areas), and so everyone who bags the onsight had the same amount of "beta," if you want to call it that, in the form of chalked holds. This, like the fact that pretty much every redpoint is done with the draws in place, makes the point pretty much moot.

See? Now you're starting to get it!

No, you guys are all totally still missing the point. Until Ed Viesturs climbs 5.14, he has accomplished nothing. Aren't you paying attention? Look, Everest was first summited in 1953, by some duffer in a tweed suit getting--how you say?--shortroped up the hill by a Sherpa. Whoever sent the first 5.14 sure as hell wasn't hauled up it with plenty of tension. Plus, Sir Ed Hillary couldn't campus his way out of a wet paper bag. Sorry, all you misinformed mountain tools; climbing hard rocks rocks hard, and will trump slugging up some snow-covered chosspile any and every day of the week, ad infinitum.

Well, DFA campuses all moves and doesn't race bikes, so sticky rubber and lycra have exactly nothing to do with it!

Yeah, there is. Being nice is bullshit, so take both hands, bend over, and cram it up your ass, shortstop.

Fuck you, you fuckin' fuck. Is that the best you can come up with you limp wristed, lyrca wearing, sporto, No, you pole-smoking ankle biter, it's all you're worth.

Are you a rockjock exclusively? You can't have any appreciation for what it takes to accomplish such a feat. I think you've got an apples and oranges thing here. Link for you. (Work safe.)

And you've summited exactly how many 8k meter peaks to gain this righteous perspective? Hmmm? Zero? Crampons, down suits, ice tools, etc. are also not part of the human body, which further invalidates the remaining ascents. NO ONE HAS SUMMITED EVEREST!!! Fucking amateur monday-morning armchair quarterback bullshit.