Dr_Flash_Amazing

Hey, folks. Come support the Access Fund and catch some slides 'n' spray with Mr. Kurt Smith. Good opportunity to join the AF if you're not already a member (why the hell aren't you already a member?), and a chance to win shtuff at the raffle, enjoy some photos, and help out the Fund. Info: http://www.accessfund.org/events/events_events.html

quote: Originally posted by trask: Nope, the next pilgrim that starts that tired old thread topic again gets staked to the desert naked, body slathered with honey, and a big old bag of ants dumped on him. A snafflehound will also be tied to his nutsack. Just 'cause you insist on existing with a snaff' tied to your jewels doesn't mean other folks want to! Keep your sick kinks to yourself, freako. [ 08-28-2002, 03:50 PM: Message edited by: Dr Flash Amazing ]

Dr. Flash Amazing will trump all of you fools with a winter ascent of the remote and daunting 5 Gallon Buckets face of the awe-inspiring Morning Glory Wall of Smith Rock. Located deep in the wilderness of central Oregon, the intimidating and rarely attempted 5-GB Wall has never seen a winter ascent, and has seen few ascents in other seasons as well, due to the hellishly arduous approach and complete lack of solid protection options. Keep your eyes on the covers of the AAJ, Rock & Ice, Climbing, V-Bouldering, Outside, and Martha Stewart Living (don't ask) for a glimpse of the inimitable and handsome Dr. Flash Amazing, knee-deep in hardcore alpine adventurism. Autographs available for a nominal fee, visit www.amazingco-inc.com/dr_flash_amazing/sick-ass-winter-alpine-send-o-rama-2002/promo/merchandise/spend/autographs for more information!

What about strip-mining, and that shit where they level mountains (well, hills probably) to get at whatever they're getting at? How responsible is that? The Doctor doubts anyone would consider that a responsible way of gathering minerals.

Didn't he say he would be polishing it all weekend?

The previous point being that the obscenely wealthy bastards who are the big political pay 'n' players will basically sacrifice anything to make that buck, and frequently slide by regulations (or pay off some representatives and make up their own regs -- or lack thereof) meant to keep them in check. There are companies out there who put responsible use of natural resources ahead of profit, so it's not like it can't be done. Consumers can try to influence them by bugging the company to change or shopping elsewhere if possible, but it's still sick that the big dollar fat cats can make so much dough but still need to make irresponsible use of resources to make more cash.

Other handy spray-enhancers: - broadband internet for maximum postage - no boss in the office - no deadlines - no work whatsoever

Typical wishy-washy middle-of-the-road bleeding heart liberal pansy anti-jobs head-up-the-ass environmentalist trust-fund up-tight left-wing democrat black helicopter conspiracy un-American terrorist-sympathizing pinko traitor sellout sport-climbing bolt-clipping rap-bolting half-a-trad not hardcore unalpine snaffle-sucking fancy-beer-drinking Subaru driving yuppie idealist attitude. (posted on behalf of Trask, Greg W, Pope, Dwayno, et. al.)

If this was Hell (and it's not far off ...), you'd surely deserve the title of Spraytan.

Yeah, the ELF cuttin' down them farmed trees did seem like a bad move, given their potential end use. Although the Doctor isn't necessarily against some of their other tactics, i.e. destruction of property. As long as lives are not harmed or endangered, certain things could stand to be smashed, trashed, burned, etc. Stick it to the bastards in the pocketbook. And this shit about them being considered a terrorist organization? Give the Doctor a fucking break. The Unabomber was a terrorist; he killed people. But destroying property is not terrorism. In DFA's opinion, labeling even radical groups like the ELF as terrorists cheapens the fuck out of the damage that real terrorists do. Does ANYONE think firebombing log trucks and burning down McMansions comes even remotely close to leveling the WTC and slaughtering thousands? Obviously the FBI and whoever pulls their strings is twisting the situation around to go after people for costing companies money. And sure, what they are doing is illegal, and if the cops come looking for them, fine. But branding them as terrorists and potentially locking these people up for life (or as traitors to America) is sick.

Don't misinterpret sport-climber utterances (an easy thing to do). Screaming, wailing, grunting, and hollering are all variously translated as "this route's swell," "what an intriguing sequence," "my goodness, what a long deadpoint to such a jingus sloping edge," and "fuck, this shit's hard!"

Speaking of which, Smith Rock hero/villain (depending on which side of the fence you stand) Ryan Lawson is looking for someone to take over the SR-BRO (Smith Rock Bolt Replacement Organization, basically the Smith Rock arm of the ASCA, more or less) and spear-head bolt replacement efforts, as he no longer lives nearby. He's offering to give (GIVE!) his Hilti w/2 battery packs to a qualified and motivated bolt-replacer if they take the position on. Food for thought for those of you who fancy doing some goodness at the Park ...

"I can see corporate America doesn't do any good for you, running that PC supported by literally hundreds of nasty corporate engineers like myself who designed and tested it, who use parts from hundreds or thousands of other evil corporate drones. Using the internet run by still more corporations and using fiberoptic and microwave backbones developed by other nasty corporations, network switches and servers developed by still more selfish capitalists, and running from the power derived by still other hundreds of other corporations for generation, instrumentation, troubleshooting, and all the infrastructure used there. Yup, what's good for corporate America has never done a damned thing for anyone else. They make their money in a trade vacuum by offering nothing anybody wants or values, when you pay for something you get nothing you want." It's not that all aspects of capitalism are bad, and of course corporations serve a purpose. The issue for the Doctor (and a few others like him), is gross corporate influence in the political arena. Huge corporations frequently flout the laws they are supposed to follow, and skip out on taxes they are supposed to pay. This results in government operating more in corporate interest than in the interest of most people (i.e. those people who are not in upper management at megacorporations, but those who get fucked when these corporations go belly up, their stock tanks, and the executives give themselves multi-million dollar bonuses). It's obvious that the corporate infrastructure of the nation serves a lot of needs, but the way in which it operates is frequently detrimental to people and the nation as a whole.

Caveness and Dru - thanks mucho mucho! It's not that the Doctor doesn't enjoy wilderness, placing gear, or multi-pitching, it's just that he prefers tendon-trashing sport gymnastics with plenty of bolts most of the time. But that there looks too damn good. And at 5.6, actually doable, as DFA's trad limit is so far about 5.9. And there's a SPORT route up there, too?! Yowza! Just need to figure out where the hell Canmore is (Alberta, no? Up in, uh, what is it; Canada or something?), and get BG to dust off his trad rack and hit the road. PS to Dru - Tricams are some of DFA's favorite trad pieces. Pants-filling is not being able to get one in. Which is a frequent problem when it takes you six tries to find the right sized piece... To Canmore!

quote: Originally posted by mattp: Dr: but check - counter-check. They have infiltrated the government and managed to dilute the labeling standards so "organic" now includes a whole host of substances ("derivatives" and "inert" ingredients) that I do not think you would recognize as organic. Drat! Foiled again! Counter-check leads to counter-reasoning, which leads to a call for counter-action! ELF! Dr. Flash Amazing commands you to burn the bastards to the ground!* The cereal! The cereal! The cereal is on fire! Burn, mothercereal, burn! * Note to FBI, A.G. Ashcroft, snitches, et. al.: Dr. Flash Amazing does not and has never actually commanded the ELF in any way, nor is he privy to any information regarding the actions, whereabouts, or other particulars thereof.

quote: Originally posted by mattp: quote:Originally posted by Dr Flash Amazing: There's something very satisfying about buying, for example, organic over pesticidal produce ... and knowing that, in a small way, you're sticking it to some faceless big business you disagree with Except that now the big companies like General Foods are getting into the "organic foods" thing. They got you, my friend. Actually, we (i.e. green-minded thinkers) got them. Wallet-vote for organic stuff over chemically produced junk for long enough, and even a behemoth like General Fuds comes around. This is a great thing. It brings organic food out of what many see as extreme hippy culture into the public eye, and makes it more acceptable for average folk to buy. It also supports organic farmers, and gives other farmers perhaps more incentive to practice organic farming. That kind of thing is great, in DFA's opinion. Plenty of the people who have been buying OG food from smaller producers all along will most likely continue to do so, while General Foods' products will get purchased by more mainstream consumers, helping support OG agriculture and spread the word. And OG food is showing up in more and more places now. Stores like Safeway carry OG stuff, and even stores in Vegas (hateful blight on the world) carry the OG goods. So this is an example of corporateness gone good, due to diligent product buying by conscious consumers.

quote: Originally posted by Dru:

quote: Originally posted by Greg W: Do not support those companies, you are free to take your business elsewhere; ultimately, that is how they get the message. There is no "greater good", it's a sham to fuck the little guy out of money for the government coffers. Of course it's the little guy that pays. How do companies pay for damaged goods? Raise prices. Greg W Greg, This is an excellent point, and it's one of the Doctor's favorite tactics. Voting with ones pocketbook is a truly excellent way to show support. And, if you choose carefully where you spend your money, you frequently extend your opinion, as companies that share your view frequently put their money (and influence, since that seems to be how the game gets played) toward causes you support. There's something very satisfying about buying, for example, organic over pesticidal produce, or locally-made goods over some megacorporation's crap, and knowing that, in a small way, you're sticking it to some faceless big business you disagree with. Transferring credit card balances to 0% introductory rate cards is another favorite. Those banking cocksuckers do NOT need any more money. So, (drumroll, please ... and some distortion, too ) Dr. Flash Amazing, for the first time ever, agrees with Greg W. Thank you, ladies and gentlemen, thank you.

quote: Originally posted by erik: dfa....qualify harming people.... is emotional stress not harm??? is scaring someone into believing your points are the right ones not harm?? is reducing the opportunity to enjoy life without the threat of some zealot attempting to ruin my way of life not harm??? is some idiot hanging off of the alaska way bridge deal...creating hours of traffic not harm?? these people by focring thier opinions upon us in their radical way of doing things is harming my way life....if i were interested in these peoples thought, desires, wishes then i would seek them out.....i consider them much like telemarketers and door to door religous types.....they are leeches upon society....attempting others to swallow their ideals....by force and cohersion..... Erik, The Doc supports the actions discussed previously, and feels they are reasonable in the face of what he views as equally distasteful displays of force, coersion, and destruction by various shithead companies. DFA feels like corporate interest frequently runs roughshod over the greater good, and that if a little of that discomfort, suffering (not physical, mind you), etc. comes back to them, then bravo. It's unfortunate that these actions sometimes affect the little guy, too, but corporate America has a history of treating people like so much cattle while the bigwigs rake in gross amounts of money, and those assholes need to be taught a little lesson now and then. Still, Dr. Flash Amazing sees what you mean (here; a snaffle of understanding for you: ). It seems that we eventually do need to agree to disagree. Clearly, with our divergent views on such matters, we'll never agree on this sort of thing (probably). But it's good that we can at least argue it around in circles (without spitting and slander and such) enough times to see where each of us is coming from.

quote: Originally posted by sk: Can we please go back to talking about climbing, or sex? those are much more fun than arguing about things that have no ansure or solution. Ah, yes. Let's get back to those easily solveable debates like sport vs. trad, gay vs. straight, abortion vs. life, etc. You know, the stuff with an easy answer.

Wonder how many times you have to say things like "ELF," "terrorism," "destruction," "FBI," etc. before The Man taps your phone, buggers with your computer, and finally hauls you off to some anonymous federal penitentary with no access to legal counsel, your family, and your climbing gear? HEY! FUCK YOU FBI! AND FUCK YOU TOO, ASHCROFT! STICK THE PATRIOT ACT UP YOUR ASS! There, that should do it ...

Yeah, you have a point, and the Doctor sees what you mean. Here, take this small snaffle as a token of the Doctor's understanding:

quote: So Iain was like: Your comments about being alarmed by DFA's support of ELF violent protests are rather ironic when you suggest filling them full of lead.That's a very good point, there, mister. Well said.

The beauty of a lot of the new shoes that are out now is that with the curved and cambered last, you get excellent performance out of them without crippling the shit out of your little piggies (uh, that'd be your toes). Dr. Flash Amazing's last several pairs of shoes (La Sportiva, anything using the Miura last, thanks) have all been comfy once broken in, and with the exception of the Miuras, can be worn for extended bouldering sessions in the gym without causing much suffering.

quote: Originally posted by Greg W: DFA; By definition, ELF uses these extreme actions to shock and scare people. This is terrorism - the use of terror and intimidation in order to coerce. ELF takes action to coerce the public or the government to take actions that ELF wants. Your other comments are equally scary: by what right does the ELF, or anyone, have sanction to destroy log trucks and other property that does not belong to them? No one has the right to exercise their rights (i.e., freedom of speech, assembly, etc.) at the expense of someone elses same rights. Greg W GW (hey, you're one letter away from the Prez!), The Doctor agrees that the ELF (and anyone else who engages in monkeywrenching or other types of sabotage) has no right (at least legally) to do what they do. It's illegal, hard to defend to the public, they know it, and they know they can go to jail for it. And if they go to jail, fine. But they make a point to never harm people, and they make it known that they do not intend to harm people (as far as Dr. Flash Amazing knows) which takes a lot of the fear out of the equation. But where do you draw the terrorism line w/r/t using fear to coerce? Is it terrorism when a company says they won't open a branch of their biz in a particular city unless they get tax breaks or other incentives? This preys on the city's fear of losing a big employer and having to deal with the problems this creates such as joblessness. Hell, if intimidation used to change a behavior is terrorism, aren't laws, using that reasoning, a form of terrorism? What about war? The US uses war, or the threat of war, to coerce other nations or groups into seeing things America's way. Doesn't this fall into the terrorism category? The Doctor thinks it's a matter of perspective, and from DFA's perspective, some of the ELF's actions are appropriate, and while they may not be legal under our laws, they further what many feel is a good cause. Hey, it's lunch time!