Dr_Flash_Amazing

"There will be no photos but hangdog and pull on pro will likely be happening." Sounds an awful lot like sport climbing, buddy.

Looks like Christopher Lloyd. "We're sending you back ... to the future!"

quote: Originally posted by iain: test.... Blasted giraffes. Always after the raspberry sorbet; and with important guests at the table, wouldn't you know it?

quote: Originally posted by Dru: I dont know what comment I made but am always willing to accept free beers. Was it something along the lines of "oh, don't worry, the dentures are removable; it'll feel great?"

quote: Originally posted by RURP: This is RURP: The Renton granite hoax deserves an award for one of the funniest and most original concepts on this ridiculous web-site. I do not remember anything else you posted but I liked the urban crag hunt stunt so have this for being clever at least once: RURP has spoken. IN-N-OUT!!! Double Double, please!!!

Hey, matt, let us know if you have any questions about the relationship between closet Jewishness and jack Mormonism, OK?

Don't forget about Trask, you insensitive pigs!

HA! DFA failed your little geek-test, and now it seems that you are the true geek, Mr. Canadia! Go play with your telescopes and test tubes, Beaker. Dru: [ 09-12-2002, 03:22 PM: Message edited by: Dr Flash Amazing ]

Wow, it's another way rad over-the-top innuendo thread! Whoooo, DFA was afraid we were done with those!

"happy birthday you're not special you're gettin' older and not much better we all want to embarrass you that's why we're singin' this song so happy fuckin' birthday, you're not special you're not special" - NOFX "New Happy Birthday Song?"

Come on, DFA knows you're all really salivating for the "Dr. Flash Amazing Hangdogs His Way Across America" calendar. 12 photographs capturing DFA hanging in his harness, cursing at moves, brushing holds, hollering for beta, and yarding up the rope at the nation's top sport crags, captured in brilliant color and stunning black-and-white. Live the sport climbing struggle vicariously every month with climbing hero and outspoken genius Dr. Flash "You Mean People Climb Without Bolts?!" Amazing Order now and get a free day planner complete with inspirational quotes from Dr. Flash Amazing himself! Quantities limited and going fast! [ 09-12-2002, 11:43 AM: Message edited by: Dr Flash Amazing ]

Since this time, apparently. Although the last couple were a couple weeks behind. Fuggin' slackers over there in Carbondale.

It's in the newest issue, which arrived in the Amazing household mailbox yesterday. It's got an article on icy suffering in Scotland that looks pretty good. And a full-on ego-riffic spray-o-rama trip report from Dave Graham (more spray than a lawn full of Rain Birds) and crew in Europe. Anyway, Ryland's article about the inexperienced and uninterested user group just got DFA thinking about how much we all contribute to the mobs out there. Again, nothing to do with whether you climb 5.17f or 5.2d, ice or rocks or mountains or pebbles.

quote: Originally posted by payaso: I will be down in Bend the week of Sept 23-27 and would really LOVE to have a chance to get on some rock while down there! I could be available to climb on the 22nd, 23rd, 24th (afternoon), 27th, 28th, or the 29th! I'll be down there by myself, the trip is work related. I can give a ride too but you probably won't be sharing my schedule (must be there 24th, 25th, 26th). I climb 5.7 - 5.8+ sport lead, willing to try higher stuff TRed but according to the book there are some nice 5.7s that should keep you busy for a couple days. I've never been and am really looking forward to getting down there! Suggested tick list: - 5 Gallon Buckets (super fun, but you have to take a number and wait usually) - Bunny Face (harder than it looks, keeps you thinking) - Jete & Dancer (5.8 and 5.9? Never been on them, but they're handy 'cause they're right next to each other, and far enough from the chaos at Morning Glory wall and the Cinnamon Slab area that you might avoid some crowds) - The two 5.8s on the Peanut are fun, and there is a new route on a small column to the left of the Peanut that DFA thinks is about 5.9 (not sure, though) - Some fun things on Rope-de-Dope block, and you can catch shade for a good bit of the day there, too. Watch out for crowds, babies, and dogs. If it's too hot or crowded at the main area, there are scads of short, topropeable routes at Northern Point, which has a short, flat approach, and shade practically all day. Enjoy!

Holy semantics debate! Look; by "gumby," the Doctor is referring to an inexperienced person. Judging by most of the spritz that flies around here, DFA made the assumption that y'all were, for the most part, either experienced alpinists or at least long-time outdoorspersons. At no time did the Doctor make any claim that he wouldn't qualify as full-on green-and-malleable if presented with alpine sickness; which DFA usually makes quite clear by frequently referring to himself as a devout sport climber. DFA makes no presumption of superiority based on time spent outdoors. It's a pretty common thing among active outdoorspeople of any discipline to slag or at least question the prevailing couch-bound ethic of the average citizen. Be they paddling, pedaling, running, running it out, or clipping bolts, whatever; it's a common sentiment. His point, lest we lose sight of it, was more about crowded outdoor recreation spots as a result of a lot of people out recreating. Sheesh.

quote: Originally posted by Cpt.Caveman: I am a major gumby DFA. My guess is that some loos rock and steep ice climbing would make you one too. Don't get too high on your horse. I'm the idiot that can't crank 5.9 and 5.10 at the crags. The fuck are you talking about, Holmes? The Doctor's contemplations had precisely jack shit to do with who climbs how hard. Sorry you got the impression that it was some type of chest-beating spray-a-thon, but it ain't.

The Doctor didn't know there was famous folk here on the cc.c MB. DFA read your article in the new ish of Climbing last night. Although Dr. Flash Amazing hasn't set foot in snow or on a mountain for a few years, it was thought-provoking material nonetheless. Tied in nicely with the editorial, too, which, being about sport climbing, was a bit easier to relate to. Nonetheless, it addressed the important issue of reconciling enjoyment and impact. It's an unfortunate conundrum, really. Sit on the couch all day with Oprah, and you're a lazy chub, but your impact on the wilder parts of the world is about nil (minus consumption of resources, of course). Get out, be active, and enjoy some nature, though, and we ensure that the outdoors get as crowded as the malls and streets we're getting away from. It's ironic how much most outdoor-sportists deride the lazy hordes that make up the bulk of America's population, and how often we suggest that they get off their asses and go do something outside, but now that Joe Sixpack has actually started doing just that, we're forced to suffer plagues of gumbies bumbling about our formerly exclusive playgrounds. Does the benefit of bringing more people into the hills and hopefully subsequently raising their awareness about the need to preserve the great outdoors outweigh the crowds and their attendant impacts? At what point will we have to stop enjoying the outdoors in order to preserve an outdoor environment worth enjoying? Something to think about while stuck in the climbing gym, or on the stair-o-matic, or behind another snarling pack of gumbuses on the approach to the crags. [ 09-12-2002, 10:49 AM: Message edited by: Dr Flash Amazing ]

Yes, trask, that is so true. It's good to have a blazing beacon of wholesome morality such as yourself here to keep things from lapsing into the sophomorically perverse. Dr. Flash Amazing commends your sterling efforts at keeping cc.com safe from the nefarious prurience of the outside world, and presents to you this award:

quote: Originally posted by Winter: FW - Mostly I was just spouting off again as usual. I admit I'm full of garbage. But this trash talker seems to think that if your biggest concerns over personal liberty involve seat belts and radio, then you've got it pretty good right now. That makes you pretty damn fortunate in relation to immigrants, blacks, hispanics, arabs, tree-sitters, gays, homeless, crack babies, and sport climbers (sorry DFA). Equal rights for bolt clippers!! Go with the Flow, FW. It ain't noble, but it is easy. Doctor Flash Amazing does not want your stinky-like-polypropylene-after-three-weeks-in-the-backcountry alpine apology! Dr. Flash Amazing is PROUD of his sport climbing heritage, and is PROUD to be a sport climber today! PROUD! Viva escalando desportivo!

Dammit! Always with the double posts these days! [ 09-12-2002, 09:49 AM: Message edited by: Dr Flash Amazing ]

Well, thank you very much, Mr. Mean-ass.

Dr. Flash Amazing would like to echo C. Caveman's sentiments on the matter.

Q. How do you catch a polar bear? A. Dig a large hole in the ice, and place a bunch of peas around the hole. When the bear stops for a pea, kick him in the ice hole! Come on, now; you love it.

You're right, motherfucker, you're not mean at all! So sorry!