Dr_Flash_Amazing

Dr. Flash Amazing has some low introductory rates and package deals going right now given the huge upswing in depression cases during the winter months. Give the Amazing Clinic Psychiatric Division a call at 503-I-M-CRAKD and DFA will see you ASAP.

Is that what you're calling your 'ludes now?

Compulsive "Who's Online" checker! Compulsive "Who's Online" checker!

Caveman, do you reckon you'd produce more jizz by puking or shitting? 'Cause while Trask swears up and down that he pumps gallons up your tailpipe, Z maintains that you choke enough spunk to drown a fish. (Triple-dis score! )

Trask, why don't you grow a pair so you can quit swinging from Z's laughably small 'nads? Panty-waist.

Friends, Dr. Flash Amazing has, in his day, been accused of many an outlandish and spurious thing, but despite all the crazed rantings he's had to endure over the years, this one takes the cake. Honestly, Mr. Morris, the Doctor has no, NO idea what it is you're talking about. None whatsoever! Now how do you like those apples, sir? Hmmm ..?

Tell you what, champ, when you can even figure out how to tie your fucking climbing shoes, maybe then you can come around and talk shit. 'Til then, you should bugger off, you dig?

You could introduce her to the relatively safe pastime of racking up PAGETOPS at cc.com.

Answer simple, BD gear not made of rock and mammoth bone.

Well, no one cool, anyway.

Isn't "minx" a she? Or, at least, "minx" is usually used in reference to chicas.

Hmm ... looks like it's another sunny day in Trask-land!

Winter, Heh heh, just jokin' with the . No, the only drag is having to buy twice as many Christmas and birthday presents. All the real angst went bye-bye 10 or 15 years ago.

Dunno if you still skate or not, but DFA was down at a skate park in PDX recently (contemplating re-entering the most injurious sport ever after years of hiatus), and there were plenty of black kids kickflippin' and 50-50ing. Seems the Doctor recalls a good few of our African-American brethren in the mags, too, although definitely not a huge percentage. Food for thought; not attackin' ya, FYI.

Shit, as long as it's made of meat or comprised mostly of cheese, it'll work, hot, cold, or three days old. Hey, that rhymed. Sweet!

Trash, DFA hates to break it to you, but when he told you he was raised by llamas, well, it was just a joke. Anyway, the zoo would like you two to cease and desist, as you're frightening children away from their 'Mammals of Central America' exhibit, and some of the llamas seem to have contracted a nasty infection. Thanks much!

Too-shay, smartass.

Come on, Iain, are you gonna guess or what? (If you do guess, pick Mormon!)

Dr. Flash Amazing was an only child until stupid mom and dad split up and found new spouses, strapping the Doctor with a rarely-seen step-sister on one side and a half-sister and a step-brother and -sister on the other side. Fuckin' ruined everything, tell you what.

Who's Jingus the Cat? Never heard of him/her. Good, nay, excellent name for a cat, though.

Perhaps you have not actually been climbing since 1990 or so, as no one paints on the lycra anymore. It's all natural fibers from Prana these days.

But Dwayner, do you always let them fist you on the first date? You horn-dog, you!

You se.e.m to be.e. suffering from seve.e.re de.e.lusions of grandeur, e.e.ain, if you think that your textual slummings put you on par with cummings.

Dunno, but you just said "rad," trad.

No, Shaolin.