allthumbs

wax?

My blond girlfriend and I were having a big argument at breakfast one morning. "You aren't so good in bed either!" I hollered at her bony ass before I left for work. By midmoring, I decided I'd better make amends and phoned home. After many rings, she finally picked up the phone. "What took you so long to answer?" "I was in bed." "What were you doing in bed this late?" "Getting a second opinion."

When I arrived at Frontier Ford to pick up my new truck, I was told the keys had been locked in it. I went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver's side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. "Hey," I announced to the technician, "it's open!" To which he replied, "I know – I already got that side."

No shit SK. I worked with a lady that plugged her powerstrip back into itself. She couldn't figure out why she had no juice. A brunette too.

Just looking at Johannesburg scares ME

Hahahaha, yeah then guess what happened flying home from the Rose Bowl? I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?" To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?" She smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask." Doh!

I was signing the receipt for my credit card purchase when the clerk noticed I had never signed my name on the back of the credit card. She informed me that she could not complete the transaction unless the card was signed. When I asked why, she explained that it was necessary to compare the signature I had just signed on the receipt. So I signed the credit card in front of her. She carefully compared the signature to the one I had just signed on the receipt. As luck would have it, they matched.

I'm in Ontario. Will someone come get me? I don't want to drive home.

anybody know any good polock jokes?

$20 for the lot.

well hell son, start by sucking her toes and see where it leads

is he the same mtn. goat as the wanker from nwhikers.com ?

Who gives a shit. Put a sock in it hoe.

I don't know dude, sounds kinky. Have fun.

think they're pedicured?

I like it W/Super Bowl at Oakland

right...especially the 3 footers with the flat heads and false teeth.

Go Raiders

oh boy, you get to pluck her toe hairs

and bring lots of money to cover Dave's bar tab

Anybody watch the two playoff games tonight? I especially enjoyed watching Favre eat snow. I guess he won't be sitting to God's left this year.

Bill, that's an ignorant statement. Of course he's not out to destroy nature. Get a f'in clue.

Damn boy, you bad.

It isn't tough guy spray, it's office survival 101