Dwayner

Hey Lambone....so you're back to your old ways and want to pick a fight, eh? (And I thought I was being a nice guy for holding back on your Glacier Peak fiasco!) So here it is, Jack-Donkey. I've been "clipping bolts" back when you were still peeing in your pull-ups. A number of the classic climbs in places such as Joshua Tree and even our own Peshastin Pinnicles are bolt reliant. I don't consider many of these to be sport-climbs. See below. Sport-climbing as I define it, involves, and depends upon gratuitous bolting. With standards that accept hang-dogging, repetitive rehersal, "red-pointing/pink-pointing", and an ignorance of crack climbing, etc., the practice of indiscriminate bolt placement (including rap-bolting and grid-bolting and bolting next to cracks)has become the status quo amongst those "climbers". This is all old stuff that you should know. I am not anti-bolt...I am against their abuse which is rampant and institutionalized in sport-climbing. A traditional approach which I subscribe to requires that the choice to place each bolt is an ethical decision. As such, they should be few (which often means widely spaced)and preferably placed on lead. I don't consider Dreamer to be a "sport climb". The cracks alone take it out of that league. MattP was quite interested in my opinion on whether I felt the bolts on that route and its neighbor, "Safe Sex", were judicious or not. I found that unlike sport-bolted climbs, these bolts were placed on lead and suitable intervals to make the climbing interesting if not serious. Lambone...after a week of well-deserved humility you seem back to your juvenile ways. Practice what I preach?...apparently you have forgotten my sermon. If you can't handle my opinion, which has been hashed out over and over and over again (did you lose your memory in that tent?), then too bad. Arguing with you is generally a huge waste of time...Unless I'm really bored...like right now.

WHAT'S FOR BREAKFAST???

Icegirl don't like me anyway...she don't write, she don't call, she don't care... Sometime's its a bitch being Dwayner. Icegirl...I put on my best outfit for ya, gurl!

By the way, that ain't a picture of Hans Florine's wife...that's Hans Florine.

That 3 hour time for Rainier seems bogus. (Maybe that's one-way). It's more like 4.5 hours roundtrip. (Craig Van Hoy?) Look in the last edition of the Molenaar Rainier book. That's pretty darn fast. A number of years ago I participated in an informal run up to Camp Muir. It was me and two Rainier rangers and a Paradise Inn employee who were in awesome shape. I made it as far as Pebble Creek before collapsing for 15 minutes and then finishing by hiking very quickly. The two rangers made it up in 1 hour 4 minutes and 1 hour 5 minutes and they were running in tennis shoes. After a couple of hours of laying around, the other guy had yet to appear and we found him down near Panorama Point...he got lost and then exhausted. Yup...it can be done. I can believe three hours to the summit, but coming back is going to take at least another hour! Ain't that right, Petey Puget! - Dwayner

Check out this link for a partial solution to those pesky pooches: Dog Diapers Here's a preview:

ALPINE SPORT ROUTES???? THE WHOLE CONCEPT MAKES ME WANT TO PUKE!!!! I'M SERIOUS.

Lamika! This is your mother! Shame on you in that tent with those girls! And did you even try to call me??? No, you talked to those 911 people instead! And all of that cold! Did you even think of taking that lovely sweater I gave you for your birthday??? I hope you thanked those nice men who came looking for you! I told you that all of that business with snow and ropes and that horrible tent looked dangerous! Did you listen to me? No, but you sure listened to those girls when they wanted to go camping and make phone calls and all of that! And that sleeping bag of yours......uhhhhhhh! We had to leave the garage door open all week!!!! When are you going to get a real job instead of doing whatever you do in that gym? Isn't Boeing hiring more people? Talk to your Uncle Maury...by the way, he called me this morning and the first thing he said was, "Shame on that boy in that tent with those girls!" Don't be late for dinner! - Mama

Here's a picture of one them chicken-heads up on Outerspace that Lambone likes so much: There's a whole bunch of them up there! Watch out! They'll peck right through your rope! - Dwayner

DOG SHOW!!!

Mickey Rooney says: "Cougar, Schmoogar....I'll take the furry bugger on! Maestro! Key of G, please!"

David, David, David!!! You are quickly on your way to becoming the weekly Pube Club CREW SLUT. You are thinking Tuesday beer get-together at 6:53 AM on Monday morning!!! Dude, that is WAY TOO ANXIOUS!!! Listen, my friend, maybe you should pick up a sixer of Mickey's on Sunday night and they will be waiting for you the next morning, tasty and cool in their green, wide-mouthed bottles. After this delicious breakfast, Pube Club anxiety might just subside...at least until noon. Take it from Dwayner....he know!

Several observations: You should have done this on Mt. Rainier instead. Then Big Lou would have scrambled up there in half an hour, thrown all three of you in his giant Jansport expedition pack (plus your gear). I understand that he carries a lighted wood stove, a snack bar and a soda machine in there so you would have been O.K. In fact, he would have had to talk you into leaving the pack when he reached the Paradise Parking Lot. He would have set you down gently in the Glacier Lounge in the Paradise Inn, where he'd round up some Irish Coffee for the group and let you know that "The Mountain was really showin' off!" with the weather and such. You'll offer to pay for the coffee's but Lou will wink and say..."Don't worry about it...the mountains don't care." Yup...you should been on Rain-Dawg. Also...did you and the girls use blue-bags? If so, you'd better have hiked them out or handed them to the first friendly ranger. (You're lucky you weren't with "pope"...he'd have gone on top of your sleeping bag if there was so much as a small breeze outside the tent.) Oy! It should never happen twice! I'll agree with RURP...your nasty self needs a big ole beer and a burger! - Dwayner

I earned my rating for providing worthy alpine links like this one: The Life-Saver

WHAT EVER HAPPENED TO "BECK"?????? He Gonna Be There? Just Heard from these guys; they might be playing tonight in the Ballroom at the Swiss: Nigel Tuffnel - Lead Guitar David St. Hubbins - Guitar & Lead Vocals Derek Smalls - Bass Drummer: recently died in a freak gardening accident and/or choked on his own vomit...or was it someone else's vomit??? Don't know if they'll show up!

PUBE NIGHT TACOMA ALWAYS FEATURES SPECIAL GUEST CELEBRITIES!

The POWER of GU!!!

A recent graduate at the Annual Excellence in First Aid Banquet.

"Psssttt! Hey John! Does your salad look funny?" "When it comes down to dying, I want to know what it is like to have really lived." ---Lou Whittaker

"Any of you guys got a sleeping bag?....Better wake it up!!!...That's a good one! Now get outta here you guys and hit the slopes."

Dave S. say: "The marklyville Death Ride is way harder!" What's your point, mate? Are you doing RAMROD? No. Than how about a little support for the studs/studettes who are taking the BIG challenge?

Tomorrow...July 25...2002...once again, the perhaps the toughest bicycle challenge this side of the Pecos...it's RAMROD: Ride Around Mt. Rainier in One Day!!! Lesser known is the annual corresponding event, CAMROD: Croquet Around Mt. Rainier. Once again, 8-time champion, Dwayner, will be found on the roads of the National Park with his running game of croquet. Look for him between Longmire and Paradise and perhaps onward to Ohanapecosh. (He got injured in last Sunday's McCubbin's Gulch Scramble so the total mileage is uncertain.) If you are on your bike, you may yell, "Hi Dwayner", or a similar clever phrase if you choose. Don't hit or swat at him....he carries a mallet. And give a shout-out to his support crew, world-famous So.Cal. climber "Denis Erectus" with his little assistant, "Mr. Sammo". Have a successful and safe challenge and see you on the Big Hill! - Dwayner

GUESS WHO'S COMING TO PUBE CLUB TONIGHT??? Mystery Guest and his rascally pal: Pride of the Sport Climbing Community [ 07-23-2002, 04:35 PM: Message edited by: Dwayner ]

YUMMMMMMMMMMMM! Kayak Rolls! I think I ordered some of those in a Sushi Bar the other night!

S.D. Jr. WANNA KNOW: "The Fiddler, uh huh! When you cats showin' up?"