allthumbs Posted August 7, 2002 Posted August 7, 2002 Saturday afternoon, I was sitting in my lawn chair, drinking beer and watching my girlfriend mow the lawn. The neighbor lady from across the street was so outraged at this that she came over and shouted at me, "You should be hung." I calmly replied, "I am. That's why she cuts the grass". Quote
Juneriver Posted August 7, 2002 Posted August 7, 2002 I just let the grass grow so long that the 80+ year-old lady next door (who keeps her yard immaculate) comes over to ask if she can mow it for me. Apparently, my famed crop of dandelion seeds were disrupting her landscaping. Quote
Greg_W Posted August 7, 2002 Posted August 7, 2002 I'm glad that swedish penis pump is working for you. Quote
rr666 Posted August 7, 2002 Posted August 7, 2002 About once a month, I go through mine with a weedeater mainly so I can get to the barbecue. It is amazing why so many people care too much for their lawns Quote
freeclimb9 Posted August 8, 2002 Posted August 8, 2002 A little girl was playing in the garden when she spotted two spiders mating. “Daddy, what are those two spiders doing?” she asked. “They’re mating,” her father replied. “What do you call the spider on top, Daddy?” she asked. “That’s a daddy longlegs.” her father answered. “So, the other one is a mommy longlegs?” the little girl asked. “No,” her father replied. “Both of them are daddy longlegs.” The little girl thought for a moment, then took her foot and stamped them flat. “Well, we’re not having that sort of sh*t in our garden. Quote
erik Posted August 8, 2002 Posted August 8, 2002 quote: Originally posted by freeclimb9: A little girl was playing in the garden when she spotted two spiders mating. “Daddy, what are those two spiders doing?” she asked. “They’re mating,” her father replied. “What do you call the spider on top, Daddy?” she asked. “That’s a daddy longlegs.” her father answered. “So, the other one is a mommy longlegs?” the little girl asked. “No,” her father replied. “Both of them are daddy longlegs.” The little girl thought for a moment, then took her foot and stamped them flat. “Well, we’re not having that sort of sh*t in our garden. u homophobe! Quote
Mr._Natural Posted August 9, 2002 Posted August 9, 2002 Drunk gets up from the bar and goes into the mens room. A few minutes later there's a blood-curdling scream from inside. A few minutes later another scream. After the third scream the bartender goes to the door and yells, "Is everything ok in there?". The drunk yells out, "I'm trying to flush but every time I try, something reaches up a squeezes the hell out of my balls!!" The bartender goes in and says, "Ya damned fool, you're sitting on the mop bucket!!!!" [ 08-09-2002, 09:51 AM: Message edited by: Mr. Natural ] Quote
erik Posted August 9, 2002 Posted August 9, 2002 quote: Originally posted by Mr. Natural: Drunk gets up from the bar and goes into the mens room. A few minutes later there's a blood-curdling scream from inside. A few minutes later another scream. After the third scream the bartender goes to the door and yells, "Is everything ok in there?". The drunk yells out, "I'm trying to flush but every time I try, something reaches up a squeezes the hell out of my balls!!" The bartender goes in and says, "Ya damned fool, you're sitting on the mop bucket!!!!" the funniest part about that joke, is it is true....why do ya think they call him mr. natural!!! Quote
Mr._Natural Posted August 9, 2002 Posted August 9, 2002 yeah my boyz are squeeky fukking clean though!!! Fugazi? Quote
Dr_Flash_Amazing Posted August 9, 2002 Posted August 9, 2002 No good; Fugazi's a four-piece. DFA wanted it to be Minor Threat, given the bald front-man, but again, four-piece. Quote
sk Posted August 9, 2002 Posted August 9, 2002 what's wron with Fugazi? hey what wrong with a four peice???? what, you like cherry popin' daddies or something? Quote
Dr_Flash_Amazing Posted August 9, 2002 Posted August 9, 2002 Ugh. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. You have completely misunderstood. The Doctor assumed that fella was asking if was Fugazi. DFA, being a huge fan of Fugazi, was thinking that could not be Fugazi, because Fugazi is a four-piece, and is obviously a three-piece. Which is why they couldn't be Minor Threat either, or most of the other good bands that are or were out there. And no, the Doctor has never been a big fan of the CPD's, although their live show used to be a kick in the ass. Sheesh. Quote
sk Posted August 9, 2002 Posted August 9, 2002 I wasn't a hudge fan either, but they played in eugene ALOT and were tolerable if you got realy high first. I used to (gee this was a long time ago) date a guy who was in a band called uncle charlie, they used to open sometimes Did you ever see ZOMBIE TOOL SHED??? raging 3 peice. they weren't arround long thou Quote
Mr._Natural Posted August 9, 2002 Posted August 9, 2002 this was an 80's punk thread right? [ 08-09-2002, 11:30 AM: Message edited by: Mr. Natural ] Quote
Dr_Flash_Amazing Posted August 9, 2002 Posted August 9, 2002 Is that NOFX? Looks like Fat Mike on the right. Quote
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