allthumbs Posted February 26, 2002 Posted February 26, 2002 When someone lets a real stinker go in a meeting or an elevator, is it acceptable to inquire, "All right. Who farted?" Everyone is already blaming someone else in his mind; asking out loud relieves the tension. Remember, too, that "Whoever smelt it, dealt it" is archaic. Don’t blame the messenger. [ 02-26-2002: Message edited by: trask ] Quote
moron Posted February 26, 2002 Posted February 26, 2002 Get your lighter ready, then tell them to bend over and do it again. Quote
hikerwa Posted February 27, 2002 Posted February 27, 2002 Gag loudly, and make gross exgaggerations to how nasty it smells. Make a huge deal of it, then it's over, and all will return to normal. (this is especially true if it was your own fart!) Quote
Dru Posted February 27, 2002 Posted February 27, 2002 quote: Originally posted by hikerwa: Gag loudly, and make gross exgaggerations to how nasty it smells. Make a huge deal of it, then it's over, and all will return to normal. (this is especially true if it was your own fart!) Pick the smallest person in the room and blame them. Quote
jon Posted February 27, 2002 Posted February 27, 2002 If it's you, suck it into your bike bottle and blow it on people. Quote
pope Posted February 27, 2002 Posted February 27, 2002 Turn to the "artist" of this noise and ask, "And your last name, sir?" Quote
allthumbs Posted February 27, 2002 Author Posted February 27, 2002 A lady walks into a Lexus dealership. She browses around, then spots the perfect car and walks over to inspect it. As she bends to feel the fine leather upholstery, a loud fart escapes her. Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and hopes a sales person doesn't pop up right now. As she turns back, and there standing next to her is a salesman. "Good day, Madame. How may we help you today?" Very uncomfortably she asks, "Sir, what is the price of this lovely vehicle?" He answers, "Madame, if you farted just touching it, you are going to shiit when you hear the price." Quote
Doug Posted February 27, 2002 Posted February 27, 2002 A couple of my favorites: "Your voice has changed, but you've got the same breath." "Will the owner of this stench please retrive it and get it the hell out of here?" Quote
Bronco Posted February 27, 2002 Posted February 27, 2002 quote: Originally posted by jon: If it's you, suck it into your bike bottle and blow it on people. nice one jon, I'll have to give it a try. ever tried "cup-a-fart"? kind of the same thing but using your hand to capture the aroma and release it in someone's face. I have a friend who is a master of this art. Quote
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