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Posted
In 2 1/2 decades of climbing, i've seen a lot of stuff and tried a lot of stuff...I've soloed when i was younger, I've climbed R and X routes where falls would have been UGLY...I've projected/pounded routes to the point of completion and sometimes not...I've established bolted routes...I've established trad lines...I've gone and retroed my own stuff...I've been super fit...I've been (and am) grossly out of shape and still love climbing even though i suck at it...I've been utterly humiliated and I've been a super star (in my own mind). I've thrown wobblers you wouldn't believe where i didn't want to show my face later due to embarassment(do they still use that term, wobbler)? I've nearly wrecked the car driving into a canyon for the first time due to being utterly awestruck and dumbfounded at the beauty of a place...I've eurosportfagged it hard. I've ripped finger tendons. I've damaged shoulders. I've broken foots and ankles. I've climbed with old folks, young folks, been young & been getin' old. I've climbed shitpiles of choss, i've climbed pure white limestone over the mediterranean., i've climbed beautiful golden granite, fire red sandstone. I've had awesome partners, i've had shitty partners...I've been a great climbing buddy and well, honestly, i've been a shit too...

 

You know what? I APPRECIATE every single chance i get to go climbing. I APPRECIATE every flavor of flavor of climbing, every chance i get and those chances are becoming fewer and further apart. The one thing in this life that really really bums me out is lack of time...if you think about it, even 10 decades is not enough time.

 

:tup: on post, but why post in spray? you must have known that the usual idiots would jump in with their typical projections and vomit?

 

i would like to think that if you posted something like this on the climber's board, the fat angry bastards would either stay away, or be subjected to the influences of the capricious warlord.

 

cool post though, but are the limitations on time ones that keep you from previous world-travels, or ones that keep you from even engaging in a few hours a few times a week? i guess i'm lucky cuz i get psyched about things like one arms offa door jambs and shit like that, and i can always do that in the midst of the maddest shit i got going on.... :crosseye:

ahhh...its job "time"...it has a weird way of infiltrating most of my waking hours, even when i'm not "working"...coupled with family time commitments, and well, your's truly gets put on the back burner...i don't resent it, but i sure do appreciate the few chances that i do get to get outside unencumbered. Does that make any sense? Plus, lately, i've got this really weird sense of mortality/clock ticking bullshit...honestly, its fucking with me hard...

 

SOunds like a perfect time for that pullup contest.

it would only depress me more...plus, what good would come from crushing you?

I have said many times that I grew up in Montana. When I was a budding climber, Alex Lowe was climbing out of Missoula. My attempts at his lines were pathetic at first and then I got better and better. Finally, I was cruising Alex's lines and others all over the Bitterroot and having a blast. I was even putting up hard lines of my own. Meanwhile, he had moved on to just about everywhere else. I remember him making the decision to be a professional climber. I remember making my decision to make it my favorite sport but not my main focus. As I watched Alex move on, it did not ever occur to me that he would die in a freakishly huge avalanche. It would have been less freakish for him to have died under the wheels of a logging truck in Missoula in the seventies.

His death brought me into the realm of wondering what could have been, what was, and what comes next. His kids and mine are similar ages. That was hard. Why did I get so depressed when I could not climb for a long time? What kept driving me to push my limits and risk leaving my children behind? There really are no good explanations. I settle for the fact that I have continued to make the right decisions for almost 50 years. The fact that Alex did too, and died in the mountains anyway, only confirms for me that no matter what path you choose, there are risks.

Growing old is a reward for good decisions and proof that luck plays a big part in things.

I still think about going back to the Bitterroot and finishing that alpine 5.12 I started but chances are, I will go to a soccer tournament instead. The occasional NR of Stuart or some such thing is a great time for me. Watching my girls excell in different things is great fun too. When we climb and ski, I am still the teacher but my days are numbered. They will be relentless and move on. I will climb Castle Rock, and backpack with my wife into the sunset.

But first, I will spray here and watch you all grow old.

 

Posted

that must have been crazy following Alex around...i remembered thinking "wow, if that guy gets whacked in the hills, we are all just kidding ourselves"...

Posted

He was in his own league.

There were other hot climbers around Missoula in those days too. Tom Ballard, Dave Evringham, Marvin McDonald were all clearly better/more experienced than I was but I could think that I might catch up to them some day.

Alex just kept getting better by leaps and bounds.

The avalanche that got him was a 1/4 mile wide and started 6000 ft above them. Conrad said it jumped hills like they weren't even there. You can't plan for everything.

 

 

Posted
ahhh...its job "time"...it has a weird way of infiltrating most of my waking hours, even when i'm not "working"...coupled with family time commitments, and well, your's truly gets put on the back burner...i don't resent it, but i sure do appreciate the few chances that i do get to get outside unencumbered. Does that make any sense? Plus, lately, i've got this really weird sense of mortality/clock ticking bullshit...honestly, its fucking with me hard...

 

no way to compartmentalize a bit and step outside of the "work" role a little after hours? mebbe yer carrying too big a load? altho i suppose that's what's expected when yer runnin projects and such....

 

how's yer mortality awareness affecting yer climbing? priorities and such, or a generalized angst? hey, this is public therapy hour, so let it all out! :D

just know you're not the only one with mortality issues. i get worked a bit at times too, but that's when you gotta run out and get a new 46" lcd screen 1080 with 10,000:1 refresh rate don't ya know? i believe yer in your 40's now, so that's how it's done at this age....maybe a Tesla?

but seriously, it fucks with me sometimes too, but i try to keep it in perspective, knowing that it's simply the cycle we've got here on this planet and there ain't a damn thing i can do except keep living my life the bestest mostest inspired i can.

mebbe a visit to the Peyote Temple could help ya.

Posted
In 2 1/2 decades of climbing, i've seen a lot of stuff and tried a lot of stuff...I've soloed when i was younger, I've climbed R and X routes where falls would have been UGLY...I've projected/pounded routes to the point of completion and sometimes not...I've established bolted routes...I've established trad lines...I've gone and retroed my own stuff...I've been super fit...I've been (and am) grossly out of shape and still love climbing even though i suck at it...I've been utterly humiliated and I've been a super star (in my own mind). I've thrown wobblers you wouldn't believe where i didn't want to show my face later due to embarassment(do they still use that term, wobbler)? I've nearly wrecked the car driving into a canyon for the first time due to being utterly awestruck and dumbfounded at the beauty of a place...I've eurosportfagged it hard. I've ripped finger tendons. I've damaged shoulders. I've broken foots and ankles. I've climbed with old folks, young folks, been young & been getin' old. I've climbed shitpiles of choss, i've climbed pure white limestone over the mediterranean., i've climbed beautiful golden granite, fire red sandstone. I've had awesome partners, i've had shitty partners...I've been a great climbing buddy and well, honestly, i've been a shit too...

 

When you have lived and loved like RuMr has........

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