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Women take note...you've been all 'splained!


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Posted

from the rc post

 

What is it about certain women that attracts them to climbing? Historically, climbing has been a male-dominated activity.

 

If a man gets into nursing, don’t you normally assume he’s gay? That’s just a stereotype, but in my experience, it’s often a valid one. There’s something unique about a male who joins a profession that is 95 percent female.

 

Likewise, I propose that most women who get into climbing have certain characteristics, other than just a love of climbing, that drive their pursuit of the activity.

 

I have a few theories as to the reasons women climb. I haven’t conducted any formal research on the subject – I just have years of anecdotal observations. To simplify matters, I’ve broken my observations into certain categories.

 

It is worth noting that I am a happily married male. This allows me to make objective observations without getting distracted by the sexual tension that often exists between single climbers of the opposite sex.

 

Anyway, here are the categories.

 

The Boyfriend Follower: These women don’t have much interest in climbing. However, they have great interest in their boyfriends who happen to be climbers. These women spend a lot of time belaying and not much time climbing. As long as they don’t grow resentful, this type can make an ideal girlfriend for a guy who’s looking for a belay slave. Their motivation is to spend as much time as possible with their boyfriends, no matter what he’s doing.

 

The Histrionic (aka The Attention Seeker): These women are most predominant in the gym environment and crowded, accessible sport crags. They relish in the attention of males, but will appear aloof and unapproachable to the majority of men. They are often good climbers who tend to hang with the stronger male climbers. They can be identified by their clothing selection (or lack thereof). Bikini tops, spaghetti-straps, and tight shorts. Cleavage is abundant. Their motivation is that they thrive on the attention of males and the sense of control this gives them.

 

The Serial Monogamist: These women don’t flaunt their sexuality as much as the histrionic, but they are generally still somewhat attractive. Climbing is a big dating game for them. They are often n00bs who get the attention of men by asking for help. They quickly latch on a helpful male, but for reasons yet unknown to me, the relationship tends to be short-lived. They are easily identified in the gym environment because they have a new male “partner” every couple of weeks. Their motivation is simply to have a relationship, after relationship, after relationship…

 

The Hippie: These women are drawn to climbing because they see it as “counterculture.” Look for dreads, hemp shoes, nose rings, and beat-up old cars to identify this group. They will often spend more time slacklining and hitting the bong than actually climbing. Their motivation to climb is that it supports their counterculture identity.

 

The Climber: These are women who climb simply because they have a passion for climbing. There are no ulterior motivations involved here. This is the minority of women climbers.

 

I’d love to hear everyone’s feedback on this. Have others made similar observations? I’m sure I missed many categories and I wonder what others have noticed.

 

If you’re female and you find yourself getting defensive and self-righteous in your reply, it is likely because I accurately identified you in one of the above categories. It’s natural to be defensive in that case.

 

But please keep in mind that ranting at me will not serve the rc.com community that could benefit from a rational discussion of this topic. So let’s keep this discussion civil!

 

Posted

GOD DAMN IT RUMR i swore i wouldn't log in all day at work today. this is your fault!!!!!!! :nurd:

 

that was fucking hillarious and right on too i might add :tup:

 

he forgot the yuppy climber though...the one will all the gear and no skills that climbs on "occasion" so they can think they are all rough and tumble :fahq:

Posted

This is FUNNY! But you shouldn't make fun of women, they are people too. If you want to reproduce, it helps to have one around. Plus I know a lot of women climbers that can climb pretty hard. I like belay them because its fun to watch their achievements in the gym.

 

But RESPECT the women. They are the future mothers of your children, OK men? Its funny to try to fit them into catagories, but remember that your mom is probably a woman. You should give her a call this evening.

 

 

Posted

No you can't. She can't go into Canada because of the drinking problem she had. But that is in the past.

 

DO NOT talk about her here!

Posted

The Prude Climber:

 

This humorless climber generally has a scowl on her face and lurks at ANY opportunity to be offended and turn something into a sexist debate. (Note the complete inability to laugh at herself, or a whimsical breakdown of the female climbing culture). Body type is usually man-ish, and although her mamilarry proturberences may be profound, the stocky nature of the beast is necessary to support her girthy legs and chest.

Posted
So cc.com gals, which category are you? Be honest!

 

i'll bite.

 

Climber. with a hint (okay more than a hint fuck you all :fahq:;) ) of the attention whore one who wears prana tops.

 

i suck at climbing but i am consistent at sucking :grin:

Posted

The Hippie: These women are drawn to climbing because they see it as “counterculture.” Look for dreads, hemp shoes, nose rings, and beat-up old cars to identify this group. They will often spend more time slacklining and hitting the bong than actually climbing. Their motivation to climb is that it supports their counterculture identity.

 

Sounds like my Tele-skiing friends that liked to ride around in my '69 VW microbus.

Posted
So cc.com gals, which category are you? Be honest!

 

I'll bite. First, this is hilarious. :lmao: The boyfriend follower description is spot on. Been there with skiing, but I was a girlfriend who fell in love with the sport and dumped the guy.

 

#1 no since married and mr. rmncwrtr does not rock or gym climb yet. He'll be following me!

#2 no way since I'm not a center-of-attention type not to mention that type of clothing is not me in any way shape or form.

#3 no since married.

#4, I may have hips, but I am so not a hippie chick.

 

That leaves #5, the climber. It fits even though I only climbed for the first time last week, but I fell in love with it like skiing and can't wait to do climb more inside and get outside. I'm keeping mr. rmncwrtr and kids amused by practicing my knots and tying into my harness :)

 

Posted
So cc.com gals, which category are you? Be honest!

 

i'll bite.

 

Climber. with a hint (okay more than a hint fuck you all :fahq:;) ) of the attention whore one who wears prana tops.

 

i suck at climbing but i am consistent at sucking :grin:

 

 

 

Muffy Muffy Muffy....... I love it! Your post is SOOOO funny!

 

No worries about being an attention whore, I'm a bit of one myself, plus I think prana tops are hot!

 

If I were a girl, I'd be.............. Mythos, what do YOU think!?

Posted
So cc.com gals, which category are you? Be honest!

 

i'll bite.

 

Climber. with a hint (okay more than a hint fuck you all :fahq:;) ) of the attention whore one who wears prana tops.

 

i suck at climbing but i am consistent at sucking :grin:

 

 

 

Muffy Muffy Muffy....... I love it! Your post is SOOOO funny!

 

No worries about being an attention whore, I'm a bit of one myself, plus I think prana tops are hot!

 

If I were a girl, I'd be.............. Mythos, what do YOU think!?

 

is there a reason you are stroking my ego all over the place. god damn i am a sucker for that :moondance::moondance::moondance::brew:

Posted
I'm just a natural flirt, and, you are pretty damn funny! Seriously, that was one of the funniest posts I've read!

 

i am a master of the double entendre or as my friend in high school called them the "sexual in your window" ;)

 

Posted
The Prude Climber:

 

This humorless climber generally has a scowl on her face and lurks at ANY opportunity to be offended and turn something into a sexist debate. (Note the complete inability to laugh at herself, or a whimsical breakdown of the female climbing culture). Body type is usually man-ish, and although her mamilarry proturberences may be profound, the stocky nature of the beast is necessary to support her girthy legs and chest.

 

All you have to do is take the word 'climber' out of that and you have a reasonably good definition of a East Coast Liberal College Student.

Posted
I'm just a natural flirt, and, you are pretty damn funny! Seriously, that was one of the funniest posts I've read!

 

i am a master of the double entendre or as my friend in high school called them the "sexual in your window" ;)

 

those are double fenestres

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