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Posted

The real question is, when you eat a 2000+? calorie [18 oz beef] cheeseburger at Pilot Butte in Bend, OR, and you only have a very small and unassuming dump two days after eating it, where did the burger go? That is what you find when you look up "scary" in the dictionary.

 

Thanks for the input enelson & bstach. I'll be bagging.

Posted
The real question is, when you eat a 2000+? calorie [18 oz beef] cheeseburger at Pilot Butte in Bend, OR, and you only have a very small and unassuming dump two days after eating it, where did the burger go? That is what you find when you look up "scary" in the dictionary.

 

Look up "Dunlap's Disease" in the dictionary. 2000+ calorie cheeseburgers are a major risk factor.

Posted
True story. My wife asked me this question tonight. Over dinner no less. If you eat a 1000 calorie hamburger, and the next day you crap, does any of the 1000 calories go with it? I told her no, they were burnt by your body during digestion. But I honestly don't know the answer. Anyone?

What a lovely dinner conversation. Your answer was correct. Now find a charming supposed climber who frequents this site to tell her what a stupid, ignorant, irrelevant question it was.

Posted

Ok, not to sound gross, but what happens when you have diarrhea in the mountains? I live with Chron's disease, (which in essence means your bowels are all F-ed up) so I am trying to imagine what the heck I would do! Ugh! Four bags of poo every day?!? Thats when mountains need Biohazard trash cans. LOL

Posted
Ok, not to sound gross, but what happens when you have diarrhea in the mountains? I live with Chron's disease, (which in essence means your bowels are all F-ed up) so I am trying to imagine what the heck I would do! Ugh! Four bags of poo every day?!? Thats when mountains need Biohazard trash cans. LOL

 

Spray paint a rock bright brown!

Posted (edited)
Ok, not to sound gross, but what happens when you have diarrhea in the mountains? I live with Chron's disease, (which in essence means your bowels are all F-ed up) so I am trying to imagine what the heck I would do! Ugh! Four bags of poo every day?!? Thats when mountains need Biohazard trash cans. LOL

 

OMG that was gross!

 

I thought Chron's disease was when your altimeter watch was always 500 feet off.

 

Seriously, though, your options are limited. At times, climbers do have issues with pooing in unlikely places. A friend had to open bomb bay doors while on lead on an aid climb once. This kind of poor planning is generally frowned upon, however.

 

Basically, you have four alternatives:

 

1) Never hike further than you can run in 10 seconds from a restroom.

 

2) Stop eating.

 

3) Consider a colostomy bag and an oversized backpack.

 

4) Hike only in third world countries in a trekking skirt without underwear. You'll blend right in.

 

These may not be the most attractive courses of action, but if I can continue to climb with all of my addictions and psychological disorders, you can certainly find a way to hike with your affliction.

 

Best of luck.

 

 

 

Edited by tvashtarkatena
Posted

Down low, where there's soil bacteria, I use the Pry and Poo method: Pry up a rock, give back to the land, burn TP, replace rock.

 

Up high, smearing (out of sight of potential passersby) seems to be the best choice.

 

One thing that has always amazed me is how people can leave TP IN THE TRAIL? I suspect it's women tinkling (sorry ladies, but the stuff is still white).

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