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Posted

An online beer review site.

 

A Tecate?

 

Tecate

I am unequivocally terrified after my first sip of Tecate. It tastes like water. It was made in Mexico. I am waiting for a puddle of warm shit to form in my pants at any moment. But surprisingly, there is no mess. Instead, it's just your relatively harmless, run-of-the mill, watery beer.

 

Rating: Mexican.

 

Or maybe a Stella?

 

Stella Artois

Even though I have no idea where Belgium is, they brew a fine beer. I imagine this so-called Belgium being a magical place where the waterfalls flow this fantastic beverage and topless blonde ladies dance in wooden shoes to some sort of flute music. If I have one more Stella Artois, I may have to go have sex with a soft melon immediately or I won't ever be able to get to sleep tonight.

 

Rating: Boner.

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Posted (edited)

"Take 10 gallons of ale and a large cock, the older the better; parboil the cock, flay him, and stamp him in a stone mortar until his bones are broken (you must gut him when you flaw him). Then, put the cock into two quarts of sack, and put to it five pounds of raisins of the sun - stoned; some blades of mace, and a few cloves. Put all these into a canvas bag, and a little before you find the ale has been working, put the bag and ale together in vessel.

In a week or nine days bottle it up, fill the bottle just above the neck and give it the same time to ripen as other ale."

 

Edit: Sack is 16th century spanish white wine

 

Cock ale

Edited by cook
Posted
An online beer review site.

 

A Tecate?

 

Tecate

I am unequivocally terrified after my first sip of Tecate. It tastes like water. It was made in Mexico. I am waiting for a puddle of warm shit to form in my pants at any moment. But surprisingly, there is no mess. Instead, it's just your relatively harmless, run-of-the mill, watery beer.

 

Rating: Mexican.

 

 

 

Is this why Hello Kitty is on the toilet?

Posted
An online beer review site.

 

A Tecate?

 

Tecate

I am unequivocally terrified after my first sip of Tecate. It tastes like water. It was made in Mexico. I am waiting for a puddle of warm shit to form in my pants at any moment. But surprisingly, there is no mess. Instead, it's just your relatively harmless, run-of-the mill, watery beer.

 

Rating: Mexican.

 

 

 

Is this why Hello Kitty is on the toilet?

 

This is confidential information, which cannot be revealed at this time.

Posted
An online beer review site.

 

A Tecate?

 

Tecate

I am unequivocally terrified after my first sip of Tecate. It tastes like water. It was made in Mexico. I am waiting for a puddle of warm shit to form in my pants at any moment. But surprisingly, there is no mess. Instead, it's just your relatively harmless, run-of-the mill, watery beer.

 

Rating: Mexican.

 

 

 

Is this why Hello Kitty is on the toilet?

 

This is confidential information, which cannot be revealed at this time.

 

Stop fucking up the quote boxes.

You are bugging the shit outta me.

Stoopid pun intended.

Posted
An online beer review site.

 

A Tecate?

 

Tecate

I am unequivocally terrified after my first sip of Tecate. It tastes like water. It was made in Mexico. I am waiting for a puddle of warm shit to form in my pants at any moment. But surprisingly, there is no mess. Instead, it's just your relatively harmless, run-of-the mill, watery beer.

 

Rating: Mexican.

 

 

 

Is this why Hello Kitty is on the toilet?

 

This is confidential information, which cannot be revealed at this time.

 

Stop fucking up the quote boxes.

You are forgetting to add another closed quote tag to match all the open quote tags. It is bugging the shit outta me.

Stoopid pun intended.

 

I can't HEAR you! fruit.gif

 

And you can quote me on that.

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