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It Would Be Impossible To Make News like This Up!


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Posted
That's news to me that cannabis causes schitzophrenia.

 

It's just a lie that my enemies made up. Wearing a tinfoli hat will stop them! tongue.gif

Posted

pfff. I mean puffff.

 

whats that noise? do you hear the voices? join me in singing along.

 

me too!

 

damn rollerbladers. Alec Guinness puffed.

 

theres that noise again.

Posted

Stephen Hammond began smoking cannabis when he was 17 and by the time he was 20 he was smoking up to 10 joints a night at weekends.

 

must be some pretty bogus herb if it takes 10 to do the trick

Posted

I've climbed Ben Nevis and the punter route on the west and northwest sides is a wide-ass trail; but I know it wasn't smooth. Rollerblading up it would look kind of funny over the sometimes rocky surface. But whatever floats your boat or rolls your wheels.

Posted
must run if the family.

This is a fragment.

Please complete the sentence.

I am dying of curiousity.

 

It must be your computer, Arch. I got the whole thing & it was pretty funny.

Posted
VANCOUVER/CKNW(AM980) - Vancouver city police officers will be talking about this call for a while.

Officers responding to a shots fired call last evening on Grant Street near Victoria, arrested a man carrying a sawed-off shotgun and a bag of pot.

 

When they searched the house, inside a closet they found....an alligator.

 

No word on why the man was keeping an alligator.

 

It's good to know that the alligator is now out of the closet.

Posted
Maybe I wore out my refresh button.

 

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Posted

vagina dentata for real: the rapex anti-rape device

 

Rapex to the Rescue

Women wishing to ward off sexual assailants can look forward to a new form of protection: the Rapex condom. The anti-rape device, created by South African inventor Sonette Ehlers, is made of latex and is held firm by shafts of sharp barbs. The condom is inserted into a woman's vagina like a tampon; during penetration, the condom's burr-like teeth clamp down on the tip of the rapist's erect penis. To remove the device, the man must undergo surgery, which will alert hospital staff (and probably the police). "Nothing has ever been done to help a woman so she does not get raped, and I thought it was high time," said Ehlers. Critics caution the device could possibly escalate violent sexual assaults, and some lambaste the Rapex for being too barbaric.

 

I bet it's great for getting rid of a boyfriend you;'re bored of too. HCL.gifhellno3d.gif

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