sobo

Conditioned Where's the pics?

Well, Steve, ya know I'm sort of a project manager, planning-type guy... I got to the pub about 5:30 pm or so, and figured I'd sleep in the parking lot that night, since it was coo' with Yasha and all. So I perused the offerings posted upon the venerated chalkboard and formulated the most exquisite drinking plan. I think there was like 6 or 7 brews on tap that night, and I wanted to try them all, since I wasn't going to have to drive anywhere afterwards. I had 5 or 6 hours within which to complete this daunting project. Shouldn't be a problem, right? I'd start large, and as the night would wear on, drop the ABV (alcohol by volume) back on each subsequent beer until I was down in the lowest range of the ABV scale at Last Call. That way, as I got drunker, I'd be drinking less potent varieties. A cunning plan, no? So I opened the evening with a pint of Strong Ale (8.7% abv), followed by a pint of Festivale (8.3%), then a pint of two of IPA (6.7%), then the lamb Gyro wrap & chips/salsa with some Breakfast Porter (don't remember % abv now) to wash it down, some Stout (really don't remember % abv now), an ESG (really don't remember much of anything now), well you get the idea... I actually felt pretty good, until I started setting up the tent. I stood up waaaaaay too fast after pounding in some pegs, and got the "whirlies". Then I was done for. And yes, Rob, you speak the truth. There was some serious eraser action going on later that evening...

Great work, man. You're almost "officially" out of the PNW.

What an excellent for this thread's topic.

Yes, well-articulated. I, too, am waiting anxiously for the rejoinder.

Why thank ya kindly, Sherri. Much obliged. VUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRP!!!!1 Oh man, excuse me. Man, that tastes fucking awful... ugh!

Did you make it over? What did you get on?

Trip: Lostine River Canyon, OR - Wallowing in the Wallowas Date: 2/9-10/2008 Trip Report: Well, here's the story I'm going with, as much as I can remember of it... I went down solo on Saturday to scope out the area before pup_on_the_mountain would arrive Sunday morning. We had a meeting arrangement for 8:30 Sunday morning at Terminal Gravity Brewpub there in Enterprise (great food, greater beer, highly recommended!). Anyway, I found the end of the plowed road in Lostine River Canyon, and skinned up the forest road about a mile, actually passing the point where I was supposed to leave the road and go bushwhacking. It wasn't until I realized I was traveling faster than my budgeted estimate that I had gone too far. So I turned around and looked up, and I saw the most beautiful blue ice runnels clinging to the cliff face about 500 vertical feet above me and about a quarter of a mile back down the road. So I spun around and headed back down, then up. Going up this ~45-degree slope in mashed potatoes on AT skis was "athletic" to say the least. After about a half-hour of this nonsense and not getting very far vertically, I abandoned this idea of going up to "check it out", as it was about 4:00 now and there was no way I was going to make it before dark. So I stopped by the Blue Banana at the Lostine River Road turn-off and got a 3-shot latte and shot the shit with Jerry the owner (fun, interesting guy), headed into Enterprise for the night, called p_o_t_m to get him stoked, and vowed to approach on the morrow with snowshoes instead. I didn't really plan on this part, but I got good and drunk Saturday night at TG. Yasha the Barkeep was a hoot, and Frank the Local was fun to hang with at the bar. Eric the Birthday Boy sure had a nice posse of wimmin there for his celebration, and all in all I don't think I publicly embarrassed myself too badly. Now after closing and in a drunken stupor, I threw down my tent in the parking lot, then promptly threw up in the parking lot 3 times before finally getting to bed around midnight (I shoveled it all up, Steve). Pup showed up promptly at 8:30, and I was already out of the tent and nearly packed up and ready to roll. My head was clanging. But y'all would have been proud of me nonetheless, given my past history surrounding "early" starts, seeing me standing there grinning and picking chunks of the previous night's revelry out of my teeth. After about an hour at the Lostine Tavern sucking down local coffee and regaining consciousness, we made the mile trudge in along the forest road, then turned left and ascended the slope, wallowing in mashed potatoes up to our thighs, many times dropping in up to our crotches and waists. There were a few slides and face plants as well. Pup's got a few pics of this bullshit. It was brutal, and I kept belching these horribly nasty-tasting vurps (vomit-burps) the whole time. And I couldn't even think of eating anything at this point, either. Oh man... Well, after ~2.5 hours of this crap, we finally arrived at the base of what I can only say would have been an excellent WI-4 flow of about 400 feet in height. The lower half would have been cruxy, as it was not totally formed anymore and was very rotten and aerated after the warming spell. There is a short vertical/slightly overhung section to access the upper half of the climb, which was rambly, WI-3 blue ice. But our biggest problem was the climb was actively detaching from the rock while we were standing below it. We sought shelter behind some boulders, rehydrated and ate (I felt better by now), and discussed politics and religion for about an hour while icicle explosions went off to our right. It was kind of surreal, to be sitting behind some boulders, wearing our helmets, huddled against the wind, and enjoying the scenery while 30 feet away a whole 3-pitch ice climb was actively disintegrating next to us. We assessed the avy danger for using the drainage gully proper for our descent, as neither one of us wanted to backtrack our ascent route. We got in the gulley about 25 yards below the "blast zone" of the climb, and one quick glissade had us down to the road in less than 15 minutes! Back at the rig, Pup swigged a few sips of some Deschutes Buzzsaw Brown I had picked up the day before, then passed to me. I took one swig, and I'll be damned if I didn't just pour it out on the ground. I've never done that! All in all, a fun weekend out, although I could have done without the drunken stupor part. I think Pup was impressed to learn that I was at it as strong as I was Sunday morning, especially after he learned that I had thrown up for about an hour the night before. This fat, 48-year-old fart kept up (most of) his end of the trailbreaking along with the studly 29-year-old! And I felt pretty darn good Monday, although driving back home Sunday night was dicey. Had to pull over for an hour's nap in Cody's parking lot after dinner. Pup's got some pics of the ice and some other shots of the canyon walls on his camera. Mebbe he'll post them up here. Gear Notes: took it for a stroll in the woods Approach Notes: hefty servings of mashed potatoes, no gravy snowshoes better than skis ryland moore was right on about the Blue Banana and the Lostine Tavern. :tup:

That was one of the funniest threads I've read in a while. Right up to where Hugh kills it.

You mean like penis-whipping? and ball-kicking?

...with curb feelers, so Ivan doesn't scrub the gangsta whitewalls when he drags up to the club. Yo.

Nope. That notion suggests infidelity, of which I will take no part.

And who have those pesky death sentences upon their heads, no matter where they may go to seek safety, merely for having left their religion behind.

i am glad it works for you. I wont have that in my relationship. it just doesn't work for me. To each their own, Muff. It's just a couple of alliterative words to me.

well, at least you're considerate... did I just say "you're"? I meant "she's"...

OK, I had to quit hitting the "Quote" button because I was getting this huge, 3-D feeling of falling into a box... There's no pussy-whipping involved here. Shit, most of the time I wish I was PW'ed. And yes, for every piece of humor uttered, there is a kernel of truth contained therein. But I have no negativity in mind when I get/spend my weekend "pass." It's just my way of saying that I'm free, and every guy/girl in the world knows that.

yeah, was pretty funny.

i don't think i would like being married to you. I don't think there is very much compromise there. There's plenty of compromise. She could clear her shit out before I get back, for example. Yikes! Harsh...

??? jmace, you married? Ever been? There's a difference between being led around by the nose ring by an attractive and available woman in the hopes of getting laid, and exhibiting behaviors toward your betrothed largely predicated upon matrimonial expedience and familial serenity. The difference may be minute, but it exists nonetheless. Put simply, I never cow-towed around my (now) wife when we were dating and/or engaged just to ensure that I got laid, but now I do things/have considerations for her that I never had before we got married. Sometimes, looking back, I wonder why she ever agreed to marry such a self-involved schmuck. Friends say I've grown since those days... One difference might involve the use of the term "penis pass". It's an oft-used coloquialism that many married folks use in conversation with "unencumbered" individuals to better explain the necessity of reaching a swift consensus on the use of said "pass." The implication is clear that the person holding the "pass" did not get it by groveling unashamedly or agreeing to a certain length of indentured servitude. i just don't get that. the whole concept of a penis pass... if i am with a man who doesn't want to be with me or can't work out compromises in an adult and amicable way, i would rather not be in a relationship. Muffy, clearly you missed the intent of my post. There is no issue of "being with", "not being with", or inability to broker compromises with someone when the reference to the "pass" is trotted out. At least, that's not my understanding of the use of the term. It's a construct of our times, due to the many demands on our time in our personal lives, and an amusing way to indicate to others that you don't have to watch the kids this weekend or whatever. Nothing to do at all with wanting to be with your mate/SO or not.

you can read about it...

good catch

??? jmace, you married? Ever been? There's a difference between being led around by the nose ring by an attractive and available woman in the hopes of getting laid, and exhibiting behaviors toward your betrothed largely predicated upon matrimonial expedience and familial serenity. The difference may be minute, but it exists nonetheless. Put simply, I never cow-towed around my (now) wife when we were dating and/or engaged just to ensure that I got laid, but now I do things/have considerations for her that I never had before we got married. Sometimes, looking back, I wonder why she ever agreed to marry such a self-involved schmuck. Friends say I've grown since those days... One difference might involve the use of the term "penis pass". It's an oft-used coloquialism that many married folks use in conversation with "unencumbered" individuals to better explain the necessity of reaching a swift consensus on the use of said "pass." The implication is clear that the person holding the "pass" did not get it by groveling unashamedly or agreeing to a certain length of indentured servitude.

an open mouth...? with no teeth...?

I'm sure she's exhibiting the latter, arch. Just look at those pearly whites!

As soon as it was posted on cc.com. Such is this little interweb world in which we live...