tvashtarkatena

After I complete a really hardcore route, which is usually never, I grab the first bush baby I see and either eat it, fuck it, or smoke it, and I rarely care which.

You don't work for the City of Seattle by any chance? This sounds just like the sort of thing that they'd agonize over for five or six years. Maybe you need a committee to study the problem and a hefty budget for an outside consultant. See what I mean about the complexities of the modern world? I think slave ownership might help liberals return to a simple moral clarity they so obviously lack.

The problem with stoned chimps is that they're always doing stupid shit like stuffing half dead bush babies in your burrito, then sitting back and picking their assholes with that shit eating grin while waiting for you to bite into it. Plus they have lice.

I can focus much better after I smoke...for example when i was in high school and began smoking I started getting straight A's ....as for climbing after I smoke I get a little to timid although I can maintain better focus on my belaying. Have you ever been tested for ADD? No offense, and I'm not kidding, but pot is one of the primary self medications that helps the condition. Back to the subject at hand, I certainly wouldn't hunt within anyone who is stoned, particularly if they were a chimpanzee with tool making skills.

If my slave is a conservative Muslim woman, can I hate her while at the same time trying to save her from her violent faith, only to discover and come to admire her simple wisdom and inner peace so rare in modernity's frenetic rat race, undergo a transformation, write an award winning screenplay about the story, then use the proceeds to buy her freedom from myself?

Lakalakalaka jihad!!!!

That's exactly what my wife screams when I finally open the WC door...or it opens itself.

No, people do not perform better stoned. In all test performed, people were impaired in their performance. Unless they were smoking oregano. I have seen people lose some of the fear and climb less tentatively while stoned. I do not believe, however, in the event of a sudden event that requires instinctive, immediate action, that being stoned can do anything but get in the way.

Will I need to provide a retirement plan for my slave?

Bloody hell, thet chimpanzee's got mai boosh baiby!

"Carnival Cruise Itinerary: Day 6, Puerto Limon, Costa Rica 9:00 Brunch at the Hotel de Dolphinas Azules 10:30 Spider Monkey Tour 12:00 Beach Party 2:00 Mugger Asphyxiation Demonstration 3:00 Anxiety Counseling 6:00 Return to Ship for Gin and Tonics"

"in more than one instance, the arch-anima was observed beating a tool, a bone apparently, with repeated, sharp jabs..."

I had a near miss rappeling while enjoying nature's bounty early in life, so combining the two is out for me. You only get to die once. I'd also want my belayer to have the fastest reaction time possible (particularly given my experience 2 weekends ago ice climbing with Jens), so I'd strongly vote for apre rather than simo climbing combustible relaxation.

I can buy a slave for 15 bucks? Do they have a website?

I prefer to think of the Anti Christ as a state of, rather than individual, being. A movement, you will. And, in times of GI distress, a particularly difficult movement.

A dog at the Pearly Gates asks "Can I have my balls back?"

I hate liberals and Muslims, especially when the latter abuse liberal Muslim women.

Currently, the oiled pork loin lies neatly coiled in its own white porcelain bowl, so such a photo would be an accurate representation of the man in full.

"If ye see bone, flush it doon." - Scottish Proverb

and M16s. I'd better stop the gun talk, though, or our little Chester might cum in his whitey tighties.

When you couple this with the current rhino raping elephant wave, this could spell trouble for the safari business.

Cheney critical of China's arms buildup

STFU, SS. That's not a state supported religion and you know it. Oh, wait.....

I'm anti thesis and pro nography. Some say I'm the Anti Christ, but I say I'm just pro Gnostic.