Dr_Flash_Amazing

Well said!

Monsieur Trask ... you gargle zee ... how you say ..? zee ... butt gravy? Mais oui!

DFA

cjwhatever, your latest excremental musings are scarcely worth acknowledgement, let alone a response. Dr. Flash Amazing and all the friendly folks at AmazingCo, Inc. cordially invite you to piss up a rope, flag pole, or other similar object. Good day.

Howard Dean is coming this weekend, folks! Get out there and get psyched to pummel George Bush Jr's sorry ass right outta the White House!

'bout time those corporate media bitches at FOX "news" got the appropriate slap. Don't gigantic corporations have anything better to do than sic their legal departments on individuals? Nice to see that they stepped in their own pile of bullshit.

Fuck, this has gone from dumb to fucking stupid. MAKE IT STOP!

You, sir or madam, are an insufferable nuisance of the first order. Please direct your snide, misguided critiques at someone other than Dr. Flash Amazing; perhaps someone actually deserving of criticism in the first place, instead of an upstanding member of the cc.com community. Alternately, you might put down the baggie of Barge Cement for a moment, wipe the glue boogers off your nose, take a shower, and consider doing something useful with yourself. The AmazingCo, Inc. Community Center on N. Albina St. has some great summer career-enhancement and job-readiness programs (along with resume help and the job listings from all the local sources) that could be just what you need to get back on your feet. Stick around on Thursdays for free snacks and presentations from a local business owners on how to boost your chances of getting hired and making a good impression. Enjoy your summer! Love, Dr. Flash Amazing

Hangdogging some overbolted chip-job?

Or a gas-huffing pyro?

NO you are wrong DFA was asking a question. How can a question be wrong, you dork?

www.unprecedented.org www.deanforamerica.com www.portland.indymedia.org www.raisethefist.com www.punkvoter.com Let's bring the lying Republican motherfuckers DOWN and keep them there!

Isn't it "in a while, crocodile"?

Falcon guides are shitty in general. Also they publish Smoot. And they just recycled Vogel's Chockstone guide so JTree hasnt had a new book since 82. Well, DFA doesn't know anything about this Smoot character, but if people are buying his books, well, shit, someone's gonna put 'em out, eh? As for the J-Tree guide, is it Falcon's fault no one has come out with a new guide? Anyway, even if they were really awful evil people and financed the Republican party, it would all be OK, 'cause they're putting out the new Watts guide to Smith, which is going to be the greatest top-shit number one badass superguide ever published. Whatever. What's happening in The Spray?

"Why did you start climbing? What made you want to try it? " DFA had some friends who got into climbing through a couple other friends, and informed the Doctor that he oughta give it a shot. For some reason, after going climbing like five times, the friends in question decided to build a two-story climbing wall with a TR anchor on one of the guys' parents' house (on the brand new addition, no less. After helping build said contraption (with bolted-on railroad rocks for handholds) and flailing up it a couple times in Nike hiking boots and too-small borrowed rock shoes, the Doctor figured that climbing stuff was pretty fun. So he bought a BD Alpine Bod (cheapest harness available), some Sportiva high-tops (Enduros or something -- pink ones with a blue tongue), and a stuff sack for a chalk bag. That weekend, young DFA flailed mightily up Sky Patrol (5.9) at the Greensprings crag outside of Ashland, succeeding after way too many minutes and way too much tension on the TR. Another flail up an easier 5.8 lieback/wide crack thing, and the hook was set. Never regretted spending all of that money on gear for a second, fuckin' A. "I have heard the "average climber" (90% of those who try it once) only climb for a few years before moving on to another sport. If you have been climbing for 3 yrs +, why did you stay with climbing?" Climbing ain't nothing like anything else. For an uncoordinated loser klutz like DFA, who is lucky if he can successfully dribble a basketball or catch a baseball, to be able to actually enjoy a sport, and even do OK at it? That's fuckin' golden right there, absolutely golden. Getting up high off the ground, getting scared, working way too hard to figure out an improbable move or link an improbable route, futzing around with gear and getting pumped stupid and scared silly on 5.7 terrain, getting schooled by a new area, highball boulder problems, road trips and not bathing, tweaking your finger again, hitting the crag with a gang of stoked friends, wrapping your trashed digits around a cold beer and a hot burrito, finally sending your first 5.whateveryou'retryingtosend, meeting dope people at Smith and sharing beers at the Grasslands around a fire, watching someone climbing 5.14 and getting stoked, entering your first comp and failing miserably, taking what should be a shortish fall and finding out your bro gave you a ton of slack and jumped as high as he could when he caught you so you just sail ... fuck, the list could go on forever! It's all so damn cool. Shit. "Did you start with another outdoor sport and switch to climbing, or did you start with climbing and stay with it?" DFA started out hiking and backpacking and whitewater boating and skiing as a kid, and eventually it was just snowboarding and climbing, and finally just climbing. See reasons outlined above. God bless craggin'!

Fuckis wrong with Falcon? They make nice guidebooks that are well distributed and have sturdy construction and rounded corners. Are people pissed because they don't put out crappy photocopied guides bound with staples and filled with crappy topos? Losers.

The venerable www.dictionary.com describes snarky as "Irritable or short-tempered; irascible."

Shuddup, faggit!

rbw's preferred source: www.willametteweek.com

This thread blows chunks. i.e. (Heavens, you can almost taste it, can't you?)

DFA returned home from the anti-Bush assemblage about half an hour ago. Fine time, but not too much action. Nothing like a couple thousand people booing the "President" whilst angrily flipping him the bird. Satisfying. Funny how they need hundreds of armed cops in riot gear to keep a bunch of unarmed people from coming within 50 feet of the Prez. Ludicrous and comical at once. Bunch of burly dudes with zillion-power binoculars up on the roof of the Chiles Center (snipers?), a menacing-looking helicopter circling overhead, and throngs of secret service guys. What a fuckin' joke. Bush!

well, you never did give us anymore information... what do the wires do? wrap around your car? Perhaps an overgrown PacSafe?

Index is like 5 hours from PDX, boss! You're crazy!

When? Where? Why? How? Who are you?

You keep this madness up and you'll not have anyone with whom to speak.