Jump to content

Off_White

Moderators
  • Posts

    9400
  • Joined

  • Days Won

    7

Everything posted by Off_White

  1. Holy shit, the guy tried to do a wall with Lancegranite and Chad Kellog?
  2. Emotional stress, maybe, but if the rock or the protection can't stand a little weight, it's time for me to find a different sport. Glad you had fun.
  3. I don't care about the name JayB, it's the fact that he likes to dine on small African children's livers that I find disturbing. "No one cares what happens in Africa, those people are scarcely human," opined Alito. "A controlled harvest is the act of a compassionate society, and unpropertied individuals were clearly originally excluded from constitutional protections."
  4. Off_White

    Bear love

    Does this mean I need to let all my little possum buddies go?
  5. Well, between enduring sogginess and the recent time change, the Wednesday Night Fantasmagoria is over until sometime in the spring. There are however times when the cliff is climbable in the winter -- we've climbed there every month except December. PM me your email address if you would like to be added to the notification list so you can squeeze in a little sandstone loving as conditions permit. Off
  6. And that's one of your good points!
  7. Off_White

    What did I miss?

    You owe me a beer.
  8. I thought Jon's first post, with his signature line below the photo, was perfect.
  9. Oops.
  10. Fuzzy and grumpy as your spouse may be, it's better to call and wake 'em up to keep them in the loop, so they don't bolt upright at 4am and start calling emergency rooms.
  11. I don't think GGK intended that post to be spray, but rather respect for strength and skill, and in the case of the parkour folks, real boldness. That said, it ought to be standard procedure around here that if you think your thread has been deleted, look around, odds are it's just been relocated. I often do that to area/route specific queries that show up here in the Climbers Board, often they get more and better beta if shunted to their region specific forums. Usually I try to drop a line to the original poster so they know what's going on.
  12. Sweet..... but don't quit your day job.
  13. Your best bet would be to work on your yoga.
  14. you mean "she" really is a woman?
  15. Ahhh ya fuckin' troll, that'll be the last time I defend such a citizen of the Romantic Retard Nation from bannination.
  16. I live for the day I overhear someone at the crag say "Yeah, I muff pointed it"
  17. Off_White

    Quality

    Surely you're familiar with Mojo Nixon's splendid opus, "Vibrator Dependent?" Came home early one night from work Thought my wife's in bed with a jerk She's in there with a piece of plastic Yelling and screamin super deluxe creaming She don't want my lovestick Cause she's vibrator dependent, don't want me in it Says I don't make the right noise Been replaced by batteries, hey there fellas can't you see She just wants to play with her toys She don't want to go out and dance She don't want to get in my pants Just stay home and vibrate I'm getting big blisters on my hands, thinking maybe I ain't a man Man she ain't gonna get impregnated Play with them honey There she was, in the bathroom, sounded like she was shaving her tallywhacker with a battery-powered device. Me, I'm prancing around in the living room, got the demon jism buildup, I mean I got a severe case of it. Lot of pressure on my brain, eyeballs turning white, grabbing my tallywhacker all the time. I look her in the eye, and I say, uh, I say, "baby baby baby baby baby baby baby baby please! Baby you got something I need, something I want, I want to put my face in the special place." She says "what?" "I want to put my face in the special place, yeah, I want to get ring around the face honey, you know what I'm talking about, when the full moon comes around." She said "Mojy wojy, you got to do something for me if you want to do that." I said "What's that honey?" She said "Mojy, know what you got to do? You know I got these battery powered things here, and you know I got some things plug into the wall, put 110 volts on my tallywhacker. Mojo, I want you to go out to the store, I want you to get me something, something big and ugly, gigantic vibrator, Vibratorzilla it'd be. And unplug the refrigerator Mojo, get Vibratorzilla in there and put 220 on the money, honey!" I said "Baby, you done gone crazy." "And then Mojo, you can put your face in the special place... But you're gonna have to, gonna have to Make a little noise Took her down to see a nurse Cure her of this terrible curse Doctor said lady you're afflicted, now I told you not to grab it I pronounce you addicted She just wants to play with her toys She's got VD, that's Vibrator Dependency now isn't it. No honey you can't plug my toes into the wall, I ain't gonna hum no more either.
  18. Off_White

    Quality

    Yes, I recall your torrid and scandalous revelations at Lovefest. Pity I'm not allowed to let any of that out of Skull Hollow....
  19. Off_White

    Quality

    I thought your little man was house sitting up around here??
  20. Off_White

    Quality

    Not to mention that he's married to someone else entirely!
  21. Off_White

    Quality

    46% of american women own at least one vibrator, according to Harpers Index.
  22. That's a nice looking crag, and a much better bargain than Sam Hill was. 1200' high dome? Yeehaw.
  23. How thorough are you? Does the carpet match the drapes?
  24. No crows were counted this time, but MisterE did tune his satellite radio system to the Steely Dan station, though he changed it as soon as he successfully lured Dru to the fire.
×
×
  • Create New...