Alpinfox

Olympus Stylus 300. I don't think mine is a "D", but I "dunno". Edit: OH! "D" = "Digital". Yeah, I'm dumb. It's been a good one. Doesn't take great macro shots and I don't think the picture quality is as good as the big honkin' Olympus I had before, but it's small, light, "weatherproof", and has an all-metal body (I've dropped it a couple times). I'm pleased. Squidy! Let's go climbin! I wanna hang out with you more cuz judging from Icegirl's reaction, you attract a lot of ladies. Mr.E - Has the route been redpointed before? Is it the case that the person who redpoints an open project gets to name it even if they didn't develop it? So it's 5.14what?

Hello Communist! Your english getting better me think? For inspiration maybe you check out http://www.engrish.com/ Thank you for allow mutant chihuahua to post on human website!

Hmmm... I'll probably be there around 6:30ish. I'll be wearing some remarkably stinky climbing shoes and a "God Bless America and Ollie North" shirt. Shouldn't be too many of those around. I imagine that BP is enroute and therefore incommunicado. Don't know when he'll be there. Cheers.

Boyz, I be down fer some fantastic plastic pullin', but I'm not gonna go fer the full enchainment witcha. What time you gonna be at SG? BP, you still at work?

It was amazing how still and in control Mr. Caldwell was at all times and how precise his movements were. He must not be related to Elvis. It was also incredible watching him just rest while laybacking off of the arete (just below where he is in the picture). I'm sure it's wicked hard there and he just sat there for close to 10 minutes before heading up the arete and into the crux just above. WOW! I hope he gets the redpoint and names it something nifty. BTW: Is Ian Caldwell related to Tommy? I ain't up on that climbing groupie gossip shit. DBB - *PTTTTHBB!!!* Can you get me a job at Der Institute Der Biowhatnot? I'd take it, assuming they pay me a ridiculous salary, give me a personal assistant, and 90 days of paid vacation/year. You can tell them those terms are SOMEWHAT negotiable. Oh, and nice avatar picture!

Max, WOW! Great research and pics (even if you were a bit off in some of the specifics locales). Billcoe, I'm gonna go out on a limb (hehehe) here and say that MOST of the precariously balanced deadfall would have gotten blown over and stabilized during the winter storms. If you have your heart set on that route, I wouldn't dismiss the idea of doing it this year. CARPE ANNUM! Maybe hike up there a bit and check things out? Note: I haven't been up there since the fire , but I wouldn't put one of my dream routes on hold in this situation.

For more tasty Smiff pics, see my Smiff photo TR: OHHH!! IT'S SO TASTY!

Climb: Smiff-Cruel Sister, Delerium Tremens, Blue Light Special Date of Climb: 3/8/2004 Trip Report: Senor BobbyPeru and I decided to avoid the cc.com infestation of Smiffy by heading down there for a Monday/Tuesday sendfest. Monday we headed to the lower gorge and were basking in the sun; big smiles on our faces and no shirts on our backs. We saw this bat on the hike in: He didn't look to be in very good shape and had some kind of line/fillament that seemed to be sticking out of his back. Since he was out in full daylight, I didn't think he was going to last very long. Anybody know what species? So after hanging out with the bat for a bit, we warmed up on Dire Wolf, a pretty nice 5.8 crack, and Sitting Duck, a pretty nice 5.9 crack. Now, a note to you newbies out there just getting started leading cracks. It's important to have a very experienced climber check out your gear placements and give you some feedback. This guy checked out a couple of my cam placements and didn't seem to like the fact that they were in his living room: After getting schooled by the "Safety Lizard", I felt confident enough to lead "Cruel Sister" which is one of the sweetest collections of hand jams I've encountered: We toproped some stuff including Crack-A-No-Go (11b)which I got without falling! and Catalyst (12a/b) which I hung like a dog on. I didn't get all the moves, but I got most of em. We then headed over to the front side and I led Blue Light Special which I didn't quite get a redpoint on (WTF?). Those crux holds could use a good brushing! On the way back to the car, we saw a guy clinging to the seemingly holdless vertical wasteland of Picnic Lunch Wall. A quick purusal of Mr. Watt's bible revealed that the "route" was a 5.14a? project and a quick purusal of the back muscles attached to the climber and the little blonde honey belaying led Mr. Peru to speculate that we were most likely witnessing Tommy Caldwell and Beth Rodden enjoying some Oregon sunshine. Here he is: After watching him take a couple falls (wimp), but eventually get to the chains, we headed across the bridge where I got a couple of nice sunset shots: We headed into Bend that night and checked out the Deschutes Brewery. As it turns out, Monday nights are Locals nights (cheap beer) so the place was packed! For some reason, none of the four women there wanted to step up and chat with a couple of stinky climber lowlifes such as ourselves... WAZZUP LADIES!?!? A solid night of drinking can make you a little shaky the next day, so I experienced a little "Delerium Tremens" while leading this steep corner hand crack: I had the shakes so bad I even dropped my NUTZ; something I've never done before. The sober Mr. Peru showed me the proper technique for this pitch STEMMING! I climbed a couple of unknown bolted routes on the west side of "the mudpile" just uphill from Delerium Tremens. If anyone knows what these were, I'd like to hear names/grades. The first felt 5.9/10a the second felt like 5.8/9 with one reachy/thin 10b move. I think this pic is of the reachy 10b move on the second (further uphill) climb. I think both climbs were 8 bolts to the anchor. Second climb had a snaplink anchor. Anyone? Well, it was a fun weekend. Nice to be out in the sun and climbing some sweet cracks! Cheers to Mr. Peru. Gear Notes: Bring your safety lizard

Yeah, you can buy a bunch a' busted shit on Ebay! Maybe you could find some broken faberge eggs or some other expensive shizzle. "Um, yeah... so my faberge egg collection is, like, totally smashed dude. That's $45,000 you owe me. 3 year climbing road trip here I come!!! ... Oh, did I say that last part out loud?" Insurance fraud

I think the incident you are refering to happened on Mt. Hood. CBS news story

Holy Shit!

ChucK. Yes, NE slab = NF. NE slab is a more accurate description actually... Maybe I'll change that.

Climb: The Tooth aka Das Toof aka Der Toofen-Northeast Slab Date of Climb: 3/2/2004 Trip Report: Being a climbing bum does not provide benefits such as dental coverage, so I decided that yesterday I should get some sharp implements and scrape some crud off of the northeast slab of The Tooth. This idea sprang upon me so suddenly, that I had no time to rustle up a partner and I liked the idea of doing a moderate winter alpine route solo anyway, so I headed up. It was a beautiful day in the Alpental Valley. The northeast slab route (sometimes called the "north face" route) is shown in the photo above. The route starts in the lower right of the corner (left facing corner with rock on right side) and then proceeds up and slightly left towards/through/past the trees and continues up the north ridge to the left (not visible) to the summit. The slope is actually a little steeper and longer than it appears in this photo (some camera tilt and maybe some perspective issues?) maxing out at about 70 degrees. The base of the route had the best ice. It was wonderful, alpine ice that allowed the whole pick to penetrate on the first swing. I was pretty excited at this point and was really looking forward to the climb. This picture was taken in that sweet stuff: Unfortunately, that sweet stuff soon turned to a thin coating of sugary crap covering about a quarter inch of verglas on top of rock. This stuff wouldn't hold any weight and I began to get a little concerned. I wasn't sure if I could make it the next little group of trees (a potential spot to bail) and my crampons & tools were slipping a bit. I was somewhat comforted by the knowledge that my friend AlpineDave had been through here a couple of days before and had summited ( his TR here) , but maybe things had changed since then? I traversed left a bit and tried to go up again. No dice. I downclimbed a bit and traversed left some more, and eventually reached some steep snow flutings that held body weight. I climbed up through the flutings, past some more thin "ice" and finally reached a little patch of yellow water ice and was able to get a sinker "thank god" stick in something I was pretty confident would hold a fall. (note: for those of you thinking of leading this route, I doubt you could get a great screw in here, maybe a stubby). A bit more rotten "ice" separated me from a tree just below the north ridge and safety. Some delicate climbing got me to the tree and then I excavated a buried heather bush and sort of snow/heather climbed up the remaining 70-degree slope to the ridge. There are no pictures through this section because I was a little busy . Once on the north ridge, a small rock step (about 15ft high) blocked my passage to the coveted summit of Der Toof. I even managed to get a nice hand jam in there, which I apparently thought was photo worthy at the time: After the rock step, I was quickly on the summit and soaking in the views and the sunshine. Stuart was lookin' pretty bad ass! While dining on a Subway Veggie Delite and some water, I started thinking about how to get down the south face. I brought a 50m rope and hoped that would work. 5 (SHORT!) rappels later I was at the base of the south face and hiked around the pineapple, past the big cornice in the photo below, and into the basin below Das Toofer. I hung out in the trees at the little pass looking over the west side of Denny Mountain and chatted breifly with some ski patrollers that came by and then started heading down. In the basin below Ein TOOOOOfen, I saw this cool snow drift on a rock and climbed it. It was like a piece of playground equipment; stairs on one side and a little slide on the other: Well, to all of you poor suckers stuck in your cubicles on the last nice day of weather we are going to have for a while, all I can say is: Gear Notes: Trusty old X-15s, crampons, 8.5mmX50m rope (a 60m would have been nicer for raps), ski poles for approach, no snowshoes, no partner (might bring one next time) Approach Notes: The Alpental backcountry return ski trail was wicked icy. I took a nice digger on it at one point and bent my wookie.

Yup! I found a good deal on the stubai ultralights, but the Camp's were my first choice.

You got it. I'll leave it to CBS to give you the official density measurements and such... "...compact snow weighing between 0.6 and 0.8g/cubic centimeter is considered 'neve' whereas .... blah blah blah".

WC Zeros Size Color Expansion (mm / inch) Weight (gm / oz.) Strength (kN) Cam Stop Strength (kN) Z1** Purple 5.5 - 7.8 / .22 - .31 23 / .81 3 3 Z2** Green 7.0 - 9.8 / .28 - 39 29 / 1.02 4 4 Z3 Silver 8.5 - 12.2 / .33 - .48 43 / 1.51 6 6 Z4 Gold 10.3 - 16.0 / .41 - .63 50 / 1.94 6 6 Z5 Blue 13.0 - 19.0 / .51 - .75 57 / 2.01 9 9 Z6 Red 17.0 - 24.0 / .67 - .94 61 / 2.15 9 9 Aliens 3/8 = 9.9 - 17.0mm / 9.3kN / 71g / blue 1/2 = 12.7 - 17.0mm / 11.6kN / 74g / green 3/4 = 15.5 - 27.1mm / 12.9kN / 83g / yellow 1 = 19.0 - 33.7mm / 12.9kN / 88g / red 1-1/2 = 26.1 - 41.4mm / 15.6kN / 110g / orange 2 = 30.5 - 49.5mm / 15.6kN / 122g / violet 2-1/2 = 35.5 - 59.7mm / 15.6kN / 139g / white

can be nice too

Well I never see you at Stoner Gardens anymore, I guess your home gym is working out for you? Perhaps I could return your book at a pub club or sumfin?

"Pardon me, but is that a severed head in your lap?"

18++ or 19- ? reductio ad absurdum

Hey BP, Are you going to the Mars Bar tonight? Ken?

"Oh good, I see you all got the memo about the dress code..."