allthumbs

Hardly

I recently picked a new primary care physician. After two visits and exhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing "fairly well" for my age. A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him,"Do you think I'll live to be 80?" He asked, "Well, do you smoke tobacco or drink beer?" "Oh no", I replied, "I've never done either." Then he asked, "Do you eat rib-eye steaks and bar-b-qued ribs? I said, "No, I've heard that all 'red meat' is very unhealthy!" "Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing golf?" he asked. "No I don't," I said. He said, "Do you gamble, drive fast cars, or fool around with sex?" "No," I said, "I've never done any of those things." He looked at me and said, "Then why in hell do you want to live to 80?"

MrE. you're without a doubt the dumbest motherfucker I've ever seen. Six year olds can operate a computer better than you. Go kill yourself, you rotten crotch.

sounds about right.

Hey Drul, go fuck a duck

I'm too drunk and lazy to read this fucked up thread. What's it about? Ah forget it, I don't give a shit. Fuck you all very much.

that's because you're a dumb mother fucker go buy a clue

This thread is the shits.

I've said all along that the Arabs hate us. Those fucking Saudis are the worst. Fuck the Middle East - it'll never be anything but a cesspool.

Thanks for the memories.

The End of the Line for Penthouse? The once high-flying skin magazine may soon cease publication. Even the mansion is at risk. July 18 2003 — Penthouse Magazine, long a staple of adolescent fantasies and a favorite topic of discussion for Howard Stern, could soon be disappearing from the publishing world. What’s more, by next week Penthouse founder Bob Guccione could lose his fabled Penthouse Mansion, a century-old residence that is one of the largest private homes in Manhattan. On Tuesday, July 15th the magazine’s employees were called to a meeting and told Penthouse had missed its printing schedule—no new issues of the monthly magazine appeared from late April until early July—because the company had been unable to pay printing costs, according to several people who were present at the session and asked to remain anonymous. The break in publication resulted in significant lost revenue and could make it hard for Penthouse to sell future ads.

I'm gonna go kill some shit.

you're incredibly offensive

they tried that shit with me a few years back but told me to go home when I said the "N" word. hehehe

"SAN FRANCISCO (Reuters) - More than 100 men and women gathered in famously liberal San Francisco this past weekend for what organizers said was the city's second annual public "Masturbate-a-Thon." Organizers said they have taken the event "from the sheets to the streets," offering volunteers -- 18 years or older -- the opportunity to overcome their inhibitions in "a safe environment" and raise money for charity. Horace Santry, 55, said the Friday night event was his first. "I have a lot of anxiety, but doing this among a group of like-minded people does make it easier," he said. Men and women ranging in age from the early 20s to the 50s, mingled at a local performing arts center in San Francisco's South of Market district, known for artists, galleries and nightclubs, before getting down to business. To the strains of soothing new-age music, the men and women -- a number of them couples -- were shown into rooms for men, women or both. "This is an effort to counter centuries of censure, to make masturbation more fun and to make it more accessible," said Thomas W. Laqueur, a professor of history at the University of California at Berkeley and author of the recent "Solitary Sex: A Cultural History of Masturbation," in a telephone interview before the event. The event is a fund-raiser for the local Center for Sex and Culture, a non-profit organization that provides sex education. San Francisco Masturbate-a-Thons have raised more than $25,000 over the past five years, said Center co-founder Robert Lawrence. The event has inspired others in several U.S. states and countries, from Alaska to Germany, in which participants raise money in the privacy of their homes." I'm gonna go raise some money for charity now...

I 'spose

I wish I had worms. Have you ever seen a warble worm? Warble flies usually lay their eggs in the ears of kittens and small dogs. But only one per animal. When the egg hatches it begins eating it's way into the animal's head and, if let go, all the way into the brain. These worms are about 2 inches long and 1/2 inch thick. And if you spot the hole, which is fairly obvious, you have to get tweezers and pull the worm out of the kitten's skull otherwise it will go mad and then slowly die.

That's a lot of work and time for a measly $500, unless you enjoy that kind of shit.

bwahahaha

I don't buy it. I think he's as full of shit as a Christmas goose.

Bob is a retard.

why not? having your annual goat roundup?

CALL 1-800-COLLECT HAHAHAHA

Hey Poop, why don't you grab a tall glass of "Shut the Fuck Up", Gimp. BTW, you just made my Shit List - Congratulations, asshole!